Jokes & Riddles - August 2006

2006-08-17 12:03:33 · 23 answers · asked by zd_sr1 2

this is this cat
this is is cat
this is how cat
this is to cat
this is keep
this is a cat
this is dumb cat
this is one cat
this is busy cat
this is for cat
this is forty cat
this is seconds cat


now read the third word in each line...hee hee
(i replaced a word just so u know)

2006-08-17 11:59:04 · 16 answers · asked by ♥ HeartStolen ♥ 2

After teaching his class all about roman numerals (X = 10, IX=9 and so on) the teacher asked his class to draw a single continuous line and turn IX into 6. The only stipulation the teacher made was that the pen could not be lifted from the paper until the line was complete.

How would this be done?

2006-08-17 11:49:54 · 6 answers · asked by Erin A 2

There is a common English word that is nine letters long. Each time you remove a letter from it, it still remains an English word - from nine letters right down to a single letter. What is the original word, and what are the words that it becomes after removing one letter at a time?

First one to get it gets 10 points!

2006-08-17 11:48:08 · 9 answers · asked by Erin A 2

in the song "the riddle" by 5 for fighting what is the riddle? i mean he says heres a ridle for ya, find the answer . theres a reasong for the world , you and i . but i and kno if u and i is the answer or part of the riddle?????


ps. i put this question in jokes and"RIDDLES" just to be funny!

2006-08-17 11:39:08 · 7 answers · asked by DirtBikeRipper#10 1

A man is standing at a fireplace and is looking at a picture on the mantle and says," Fathers and sister I have none but this man's father is my fathers son."

Who is in the picture?

2006-08-17 11:38:38 · 12 answers · asked by stewart_pittman 2

OK a guy was underwater. Nothing wrong right, but here is the thing he was underwater for over an hour and was completely fine. What happened? He didn't have any snorkeling gear/scuba diving gear. He was just in a swimsuit. He didn't lose his breath or anything. How did he do it?
First to answer correctly gets 10 points.

2006-08-17 11:30:40 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

2 dwarfts worked in a circus, they were both very popular, however one of them was jelouse of the other one because theo other one was blind, so he got more attention and more admiration from the audience just for the fact that he was blind. One morning the blind dwarft was found death in his room laying on the floor next to his bed. There was no blood or any kind of weapon, the only thing left was "sawdust". Here are the questions, Who killed him? Why? and most importantly HOW?

10 points and my admiration for the one who solves this mistery.....

2006-08-17 11:08:58 · 47 answers · asked by Lilly 5

Answers this question by Solid reason or .. with perfect answer ?

2006-08-17 11:08:08 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

what a con

2006-08-17 11:07:53 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

best punch line gets 10 points.

2006-08-17 11:07:51 · 10 answers · asked by ace striker 2

The banker saw his old friend Tom, an eighty-year
old rancher, in town. Tom had lost his wife a year
or so before and rumor had it that he was marrying
a "mail order" bride.

Being a good friend, the banker asked Tom if the
rumor was true. Tom assured him that it was. The
banker then asked Tom the age of his new bride
to be. Tom proudly said, "She'll be twenty-one in
November."

Now the banker, being the wise man that he was,
could see that the sexual appetite of a young
woman could not be satisfied by an eighty-year-old
man. Wanting his old friend's remaining years to be
happy the banker tactfully suggested that Tom
should consider getting a hired hand to help him
out on the ranch, knowing nature would take its
own course. Tom thought this was a good idea and
said he would look for one that afternoon.

About four months later, the banker ran into Tom
in town again. "How's the new wife?" asked the
banker. Tom proudly said, "Oh, she's pregnant."

The banker, happy that his sage advice had worked
out, continued, "And how's the hired hand?"

Without hesitating, Tom said, "She's pregnant too."



Don't ever underestimate us old geezers.

2006-08-17 11:06:16 · 10 answers · asked by Sangy . 4

2006-08-17 11:02:49 · 45 answers · asked by michael d 1

2006-08-17 10:59:33 · 5 answers · asked by k2z28 1

I need a good laugh. Thanks.

2006-08-17 10:52:52 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

Does it tell the other fish it was abducted by Humans? Do they believe him?

2006-08-17 10:37:38 · 20 answers · asked by Westwood 1

The Philosophy of Dogs




The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.

-Anonymous


Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

-Ann Landers


If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.

-Will Rogers


There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.

-Ben Williams


A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves

himself.

-Josh Billings




The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

-Andy Rooney


We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.

-M. Acklam


Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.

-Sigmund Freud


I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

-Rita Rudner



A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.

-Robert Benchley


Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.

-Franklin P. Jones


If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have

known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.

-James Thurber


If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

-Unknown


My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.

-Joe Weinstein


Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!

-Anne Tyler


Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

-Robert A. Heinlein





If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.

-Mark Twain


You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'

- Dave Barry


Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.

-Roger Caras


If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them.

-Phil Pastoret


My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog already thinks I am.

2006-08-17 10:37:02 · 16 answers · asked by Sangy . 4

2006-08-17 10:31:39 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-17 10:17:18 · 16 answers · asked by topwrnch 2

2006-08-17 10:13:52 · 22 answers · asked by blackjack911 2

and put some chickens on there... shoot!

2006-08-17 10:07:22 · 2 answers · asked by VetteLeo 6

2006-08-17 09:54:48 · 28 answers · asked by ishsy y 1

really funny ...try it now before google discovers it's mistake.....

2006-08-17 09:52:07 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-17 09:38:38 · 12 answers · asked by compo 2

just an adjective please... :)

2006-08-17 09:38:03 · 15 answers · asked by Mr Razorblade 2

2006-08-17 09:32:26 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

but they found out he had been stabbed how did he die?

2006-08-17 09:26:57 · 17 answers · asked by element_rider_1993 2

2006-08-17 09:16:23 · 12 answers · asked by Westwood 1

you with a stick, will candy and toys pop out of you?

2006-08-17 09:08:59 · 17 answers · asked by Mr. Christopher 2

2006-08-17 09:07:08 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous