Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

2006-07-26 19:24:16 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-26 19:13:18 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-26 19:04:59 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

its only a joke...

2006-07-26 18:55:14 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-26 18:52:38 · 19 answers · asked by answer@yahoo 1

I mean, I make a joke on here about eating cat stew or something, and at least 2 people will give me a lecture about animal cruelity or report my question.
Hey folks....It's called a joke. You get jokes, don't you?
I have a cat AND a dog and I would never hurt either one of them.
Geez, give me a break.

2006-07-26 18:51:49 · 17 answers · asked by opjames 4

What state has the largest percentage of Catholics in the U.S.?

[First one to correctly answer it will recieve 10 POINTS!]

2006-07-26 18:51:25 · 7 answers · asked by Mo 6

So there once was this eagle who ws realy horny, and he needed some lovin. Even though there were no lady eagles around for miles, he was bound and determined to get some action.

He went out on day, and found himself a pretty little dove. They went back to the eagle's love nest, and had a good night. The next morning the eagle is woken up by the dove on the balcony singing "I'm a dove, i wanna make love, i'm a dove i wanna make love". The eagle gets sick of this, so he kicks her out.

The next night, the eagle still wants a little lovin so he goes out and finds this beautiful loon. They go back to the love nest, and have a very, very good night. Once again the eagle is woken up the next morning. IT's the loon "i'm a loon, i wanna spoon; I'm a loon, and i wanna spoon. The eagle aint gonna take it, and the loon is gone.

The eagle is to the point where he just wants a sane bird who's not gonna wake him up. So he goes out and finds a duck.

2006-07-26 18:49:06 · 3 answers · asked by Your hero until you meet Jesus 3

i don't need attention but i'm bored and i feel like having attention so be free to post any rude comments (i prefer random comments but it's your choice)

2006-07-26 18:44:59 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-26 18:44:57 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

How do you get a dead baby out of a blender?

2006-07-26 18:41:57 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-26 18:40:46 · 6 answers · asked by Deana M 2

Can you share your most embarrassing moment?
I'll start with one that I recall (I don't think it's my 'most' embarrasing one though)
I met someone at a party, and she was telling me how nice the party is, and I thought that she was complimenting me on my dress, so I go: "Thanks, Iike yours too"!

2006-07-26 18:30:07 · 5 answers · asked by a b 3

It's not as obvious as it sounds, think about it. Do the research, first one to get it gets the points!

2006-07-26 18:21:33 · 29 answers · asked by Your hero until you meet Jesus 3

2006-07-26 18:16:45 · 16 answers · asked by GG 1

2006-07-26 18:15:53 · 26 answers · asked by GG 1

The animal with the greatest possibility of survival than all the others?

[NOTE: Humans are excluded.]

[First one to correctly answer it will recieve 10 POINTS!]

2006-07-26 18:11:36 · 15 answers · asked by Mo 6

I think one guy gets 3 dollars and goes upstairs, he gives another guy some of the money. when he comes back down one of the dollars is mysteriously gone! please tell me so I can tell my friends.

2006-07-26 18:10:50 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

What's my new name? I made this one up, and believe me, I wouldn't have gotten it if I hadn't come up with it myself.

Hint:
The small 'n' has some meaning in which it NEEDS to be a small 'n', not a big one.

I'll leave you with that. If you get this on the hint I've given, you are much better at this than I am. If no one gets it, I'll post another question tomorrow sometime, and give another hint.

2006-07-26 18:04:11 · 8 answers · asked by 42ITUS™ 7

I am pretty sure it's breathing but idk. What do you think/know about this riddle?

2006-07-26 17:59:48 · 52 answers · asked by Xaeni 2

Closest to the right answer, at least the one I have, is worth the big 10 points.

2006-07-26 17:57:55 · 2 answers · asked by apollo124 3

The question: Do you know what major U.S. Highway leads directly to/from Massachusetts via California [coast-to-coast]?

[First one to correctly answer the question will recieve 10 Points.]

2006-07-26 17:56:04 · 7 answers · asked by Mo 6

A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is $200,000 a year."

The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshittin' me!"

The social worker says, "Yeah, well... you started it."

2006-07-26 17:55:14 · 8 answers · asked by dorihnnt1 3

2006-07-26 17:55:08 · 5 answers · asked by sabin t 1

When my dad was in collage, he had a friend who worked at the place where you bury dead people (can't remember what it's called). So one time, the guy took an arm of a person and let it hang from the inside of his trunk, making it look like a body was in there.

Of course, a cop pulled him over eventually, when the guy told the cop he was pranking him! The cop had a good laugh, and told him to not do it again, of course.

2006-07-26 17:54:55 · 3 answers · asked by וואלה 5

Johnny's mother had four children. The first was April, the second was May, and the third was June. What was the name of her fourth child?

2006-07-26 17:54:00 · 11 answers · asked by mrsjav 3

2006-07-26 17:50:32 · 11 answers · asked by Rajesh j 1

Doing?

Deja Vu?

2006-07-26 17:50:03 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

The bridge can only hold 14000 lbs, which is the exact weight of the truck. The truck makes it half way across the bridge and stops. A bird lands on the truck. Does the bridge collapse?

2006-07-26 17:47:34 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

Willys cynical thought for the day;

As my father used to say; "Look at the trees; they're all different. Same with people no two are the freaking same!"

-  Young riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go.

-  Overconfidence can be supplied by spare spark plugs, a set of wrenches, and a roll of toilet paper.

-  Never offer to fight an OLD geezer. If you win, there's NO glory. If you lose, your reputation is shot.

-  A good wrench will let you watch without charging you for it.

-  Advice is free and worth every penny.

-  Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night.

-  Always back your scoot into the curb-and sit where you can see it.

-  Work to ride - Ride to work.

-  Whatever it is, it's better in the wind.

-  Two lane blacktop isn't a highway-it's an attitude.

-  When you look down the road, it seems to never end-but you better believe it does.

-  A biker can smell a party 5,000 miles away.

-  Winter is Nature's way of telling you to polish.

-  A motorcycle can't sing on the streets of a city.

-  Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.

-  People are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.

-  More races were won in the tavern than on the track.

-  Never loan your bike to someone else, and never ride another's.

-  If the bike ain't braking properly, you don't start by rebuilding the engine.

-  Motorcycling is a giant game of Mines Bigger than yours!

-  Remember to pay as much attention to your partner as you do your carburetor.

-  Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes.

http://www.total-knowledge.com/~willyblues/

2006-07-26 17:40:50 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous