Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

1)WHAT HAS TEETH BUT DONT BITE????????
2)WHAT IS FULL OF HOLES BUT HOLDS WATER?????????????
3)WHAT HAS EYES BUT DOESNT SEE AND IS BROWN AND WHITE????????
WHO EVER GETS THEM ALL RIGHT GETS THE BEST ANSWER

2006-07-06 07:19:52 · 20 answers · asked by Gammy 1

If you answer right as the first person, you will get 10 points for best answer (tomorrow, when i can do that)

What is the next letter?
W I T N...

2006-07-06 07:18:40 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-06 07:12:41 · 13 answers · asked by brian c 1

The people who make me sell me,
The people who buy me don't use me,
and the people who use me don't know there using me.
What am I?

2006-07-06 07:07:50 · 13 answers · asked by Guera 1

My husband and I love corny jokes, as long as they are silly enough to be funny!

2006-07-06 06:59:14 · 7 answers · asked by ShineOnYouCrazyDiamond 4

Anyone have a really good joke right now? i could use a laugh...

2006-07-06 06:59:00 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

Come on people, give me a good laugh.

2006-07-06 06:55:11 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

Why all of them wear tights...?
Where did they learn the trick to undress into a phone booth very fast?

2006-07-06 06:50:11 · 11 answers · asked by Styloroc 4

2006-07-06 06:45:01 · 29 answers · asked by GRUMPY /UK 5

An elderly couple, Margaret and Bert, are in California. Bert always
wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he
buys them and wears them home, walking proudly.

He walks into the house and says to his wife, "Notice anything
different about me?"

Margaret looks him over, "Nope".

Frustrated, Bert storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks
back into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again he
asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different NOW?"

Margaret looks up and says, "Bert, what's different? It's hanging
down
today, it was hanging
down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow."

Furious, Bert yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN,
MARGARET?"

Nope", she replies.

IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!"

Margaret replies... "Shoulda bought a hat, Bert . Shoulda bought a
hat."


Anybody out there with a Yeeeeeee-Haaaaaa! for me?
1-10

2006-07-06 06:40:44 · 13 answers · asked by SmileyCat : ) 4

Ever Wonder?

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing
liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

2006-07-06 06:24:21 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

the last answer takes the 10...all the others just 2...

2006-07-06 06:18:25 · 52 answers · asked by xx_dragonz_xx 3

2006-07-06 06:17:53 · 14 answers · asked by usmchawkeye 3

and what did he/she think they were doing at the time

2006-07-06 06:07:00 · 18 answers · asked by stu110185 1

eggs come from chickens and chickens come from eggs!!!

2006-07-06 06:05:45 · 38 answers · asked by stu110185 1

You're trapped in a room with no windows and no way 2 get out just plain walls. all you have is a mirror. and a table. How do you get out?

2006-07-06 06:04:00 · 19 answers · asked by Bosnian_chic_2012 2

the first who answers this question takes the 10...lolz..all the others just 2

2006-07-06 06:01:11 · 19 answers · asked by xx_dragonz_xx 3

if you are a she..click here
http://www.mess.be/pirate-names-female.php

if you are a he
click here
http://www.mess.be/pirate-names-male.php

type your name...click and get your pirate name.

Shiver me timbers!its Sealegs Ethel [thats my name].....
now stop ye whining ye yellow bellied, lilly livered land-lubber !!!

then give us ol ur name.....have fun!!!

2006-07-06 05:56:24 · 16 answers · asked by princess_consuela 4

the most random thing you can say in 3 sentences. funniest one gets best answer.

2006-07-06 05:49:58 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-06 05:48:31 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

my took place today, i want to see if anyone else has had a similar experience.

2006-07-06 05:47:10 · 15 answers · asked by bee 1

# men go to a hotel and get 1 room for a business trip. The room cost $30. They each pay $10. The 3 men go to their room and then cashier realizes the had a discount for usin a credit card. The cashier tells the employee to bring the $5 discount to the men. The employee realizes you can split $5 in to 3 parts so he keeps $2 and gives each man a dollar. Since each man recieved $1 they only spent $9. 3 x $9(3 for 3 men)= $27+$2(the money the employee took)=$29. What happened to the 30th dollar?

2006-07-06 05:46:12 · 8 answers · asked by DiMooch 3

A blonde was driving down the road one day. She happened to see another blonde out in a field in a rowboat with no water in sight. The blonde in the car pulls over to the side of the road and yells to the blonde in the rowboat, " You know it is dumb blondes like you that give us all a bad rap. And If I could swim I would come out there and kick your butt! "

2006-07-06 05:41:28 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-06 05:35:50 · 17 answers · asked by remo_vr 1

2006-07-06 05:35:03 · 4 answers · asked by AndMan433 2

2006-07-06 05:21:38 · 21 answers · asked by remo_vr 1

2006-07-06 05:07:50 · 8 answers · asked by rj c 2

for yelling "MOVIE!!!" in a crowded firehouse?

2006-07-06 05:06:01 · 11 answers · asked by Comfortably Numb™ 7

hey the funniest answer gets 10points;)

2006-07-06 04:59:23 · 12 answers · asked by CC 1

I need to get my brother good! I want to leave pranks at his house so when he gets home from work he will be over with.

2006-07-06 04:52:53 · 12 answers · asked by richele152 2