Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

Once 5 house lizards were crawling on the wall when all of a sudden,
One started to sing a song. The moment she stopped singing the song,
others fell down from the wall !!!... WHY ???

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coz, they all started clapping !!!!

2006-07-08 08:22:19 · 9 answers · asked by simply_boring 4

Q - In a pond there are 10 fish, one of them dies, and the water
level of the pond increases. How?


Think,
... scroll...





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.....scroll.........







... scroll...





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A - The other 9 fish are crying.................

2006-07-08 08:20:38 · 16 answers · asked by simply_boring 4

Are those famous last words?

2006-07-08 08:13:28 · 17 answers · asked by Ѕємι~Мαđ ŠçїєŋŧιѕТ 6

2006-07-08 07:53:28 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

If it were two hours later, it would be half as long until midnight as it would be if it were an hour later.
What time is it now?

(a)18:30 (b)20:00
(c)21:00 (d)22:00
(e)23:30

2006-07-08 07:46:28 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

You are stuck in a solid room with no windows or doors, the only things in this solid room is a mirror and a table. How do you escape?

2006-07-08 07:42:23 · 12 answers · asked by shadow_lion 2

Sally Likes 225 but not 224;she likes 900 but not 800; she likes 144 but not 145,
Which does she like:
(a) 1600 (b) 1700
(c) 1800 (d) 1900

2006-07-08 07:36:42 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

tell me where that ni**er at so i can study his motives and peel his mother ******* cap.

2006-07-08 07:19:21 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous

3 blonds got lost on a deserted island. They found a geniue and they could each wish for 1 wish. The first blond said she wishes she was smarter so she swam across the river only to be eaten by alligators the second said she wish she was smarter than her original self and built a boat and still got eaten by the alligators the last blond said she wish she was a hundred times smarter and walked across the bridge! XP

2006-07-08 07:08:16 · 14 answers · asked by kittykat 1

2006-07-08 06:54:34 · 13 answers · asked by blueblast66 1

My Printer has been misprinting words, what phrases has it printed out?

O bord is she land in eorth too is she lush.
She barly bind watches she warm.
I tolling stonk rathers to mops.
Thy grans in alwags greeter in thy otter wide.

2006-07-08 06:51:15 · 8 answers · asked by big_dave_x 4

2006-07-08 06:42:25 · 14 answers · asked by AtoZ 1

2006-07-08 06:26:13 · 4 answers · asked by lkfan 1

Well,he's here with Ricky and Julian and hes asking about you.

2006-07-08 06:19:56 · 11 answers · asked by MrBudbag 3

I've heard alot but not enough...what i want to know is what's the best?!

2006-07-08 06:15:47 · 37 answers · asked by ♥āngelic♥děmon♥ 3

Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?

First one to get it wins!

2006-07-08 06:12:35 · 7 answers · asked by Believe 2

What is black when you buy it, red when you use it, and gray when you throw it away?

First to get it wins!

2006-07-08 06:09:56 · 8 answers · asked by Believe 2

I soar without wings, I see without eyes.
I've traveled the universe to and fro.
I've conquered the world, yet I've never been anywhere but home.
Who am I?

First one to get it wins!

2006-07-08 06:04:01 · 10 answers · asked by Believe 2

I run, he runs, I stop, he runs?What am i?

First one to get it wins!

2006-07-08 06:01:38 · 9 answers · asked by Believe 2

Tell me the funniest joke you have ever heard.I am really bored and I need something to laugh at.

2006-07-08 05:59:47 · 9 answers · asked by Kayli (: 4

name the coolest ones u can think of and dont try to copy other people or give a dumb question or i will be tempted to report you for gaming for points p.s. i am a nice person

2006-07-08 05:51:52 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous

am i the only one on ere with a SOH?? you are all too serious, it's meant to be a bit of fun!!!!

2006-07-08 05:48:52 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

Fill in the blank and answer in the following format:

You're the _____ now dog!

2006-07-08 05:42:08 · 17 answers · asked by mangobuyer 2

There is nothing the matter with me.
I'm as healthy as I can be.
I have arthritis in both my knees
And when I talk, I talk with a wheeze.
My pulse is weak, and my blood is thin
But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.
Arch supports I have for my feet
Or I wouldn't be able to be on the street.
Sleep is denied me night after night,
But every morning I find I'm all right.
My memory is failing, my head's in a spin
But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.
The moral is this, as my tale I unfold,
That for you and me who are growing old,
It's better to say "I'm fine" with a grin
Than to let folks know the shape we are in.
How do I know that my youth is all spent?
Well, my "get up and go" just got up and went.
But I really don't mind when I think with a grin
Of all the grand places my "get up" has been.
Old age is golden, I've heard it said;
But sometimes I wonder as I get into bed
With my ears in the drawer my teeth in a cup,
My eyes on the table until I wake up.
Ere sleep overtakes me, I say to myself,
"Is there anything else I could lay on the shelf?"
When I was young my slippers were red,
I could kick my heels over my head
When I was older my slippers were blue,
But I still could dance the whole night through.
Now I am old, my slippers are black,
I walk to the store and puff my way back.
I get up each morning and dust off my wits
And pick up the paper and read the obits.
If my name is still missing, I know I'm not dead
So I fix me some breakfast and go back to bed.

2006-07-08 05:28:24 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-08 05:20:31 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

The perfect man is gentle
never cruel or mean
he has a beautiful smile
and he keeps his face so clean
The perfect man loves children
and will raise them by your side
he will be a good father
and good husband to his bride
The perfect man loves cooking
cleaning and vaccuuming too
he'lldo anything to convey
his feelings of love to you
The perfect man is sweet
writing poetry from your name
he's a best friend to your mother
and kisses away your pain
He has never made you cry
or hurt you in any way......
OH SCREW THIS STUPID POEM............
THE PERFECT MAN IS GAY!!!!!!

2006-07-08 05:19:43 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

First person to answer correctly gets best answer. Good luck!

2006-07-08 04:58:47 · 14 answers · asked by finderoftruth 2

Think of a number. Double it. Add on six. Halve it. Take away the number you first thought of.

2006-07-08 04:56:13 · 27 answers · asked by D&___ 1

2006-07-08 04:51:14 · 43 answers · asked by johnnymeeky 1

One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.

"Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man.
"We don't have any money for food." the poor man replied.
"Oh, come along with me then."
"But sir, I have a wife with two children!"
"Bring them along! And you, come with us too!", he said to the other man.
"But sir, I have a wife with six children!" the second man answered.
"Bring them as well!"

They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

The lawyer replied, "No problem, the grass at my home is about two feet tall!"

2006-07-08 04:14:31 · 16 answers · asked by Rajesh K 2