Marriage & Divorce - 19 September 2006

I have been out of my home and marriage now almost 2 weeks. I am safe and everything is falling into place. I will be in a new home within a week, maybe even by friday and out of this safehouse. But I still cry uncontrollably at the drop of a hat. I know this is what I have to do but why is it so darned difficult? Besides dating, (YUCK) what can I do to help me get on with my life and stop greiving the loss of a marriage I cant save? I know he will not change, tried this before and went back, nothing had changed. I still care but I can not talk to him. I can not see him. If I do I fear I will cave and dissappoint my kids and myself because he never changes even though I left 4 times before. Yesterday he was served. I signed a lease option on a new home yesterday too. I should be happy but I can hardly breath. What can I do?

2006-09-19 23:56:28 · 13 answers · asked by Lynnette G 2

2006-09-19 23:49:57 · 14 answers · asked by shadrobin 1

ok my husband and I didn't have a wedding. But we both want to have one. I just would like a list of things I going to need to do/find to get it all set up. I really have no idea. (my dress was a t-shirt and sorts) So can someone help me?

2006-09-19 23:29:09 · 5 answers · asked by Sekkennight 3

always men creates wars >>>>

2006-09-19 23:24:33 · 16 answers · asked by get_me 1

stanley herring last know city high point n.c.

2006-09-19 23:00:05 · 1 answers · asked by frankie h 1

sidharth sankar sahoo birth 29th dec 1982 time 6.22 stardust -gemini how long days my marriage possible is it love or arrenged ? near or distance?

2006-09-19 22:52:01 · 3 answers · asked by gita p 1

My hubby expects me to read his thoughts and to know in every moment what to do or say without asking him. He wants me to understand him but does not want to communicate with me openly. When I told him to tell me, what is wrong and what can I do, he just said that if I don’t understand, then I am stupid, that I have to take care what I will do in the future because he cannot stand it anymore.

However, he is never willing to tell me clearly, what the problem is, but rather just a half-truth, "throwing the hook" and wait for me to get the point.

For example, he promised to go for a walk, and I was ready, then he told me he was sleepy. I said OK, let's go, it will wake you up… After the walk, he went to bed and said that he didn't feel good. I thought that he was just sleepy and I insisted to go for a walk, but I didn’t have any idea that he is ill, because he didn't tell me so. He was expecting me to understand the word sleepy as ill, what I didn't.

Of course, I told him that I don't like it and that I expect him to communicate more concrete with me, but he usually started yelling and accusing me for everything. I simply have no right to say anything I don't like, because always it will be my fault. I am expected to pretend that I don't know anything and that everything is OK even when it is obvious that there is something wrong.

Furthermore, he said that he wanted to keep me out of his problems because it bothers me and I am not strong enough to know about it.
On the other side, he thinks that he is fair and good to me and that he is doing everything for me to be happy and that he is desperate because he knows that I am not. But he still doesn't want to se the things from my side.

I feel lost and helpless and I am afraid to make any step further to do something for us. I feel he just does not respect me, treats me as a child.

Please, don't tell me to talk with him, because I have tried so many times and it does not work. He also doesn't feel like going to some therapist – he thinks the problem is in me, not in him. He does not cooperate and he underestimates my side of the problem so I just need to do something only for myself.

All I want is to get back my self-respect and make him respect me.

2006-09-19 22:50:02 · 15 answers · asked by smiiile 2

2006-09-19 22:24:34 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous

i think he might hurt me if he finds out b4 its done

2006-09-19 22:17:38 · 25 answers · asked by torilouanne 1

when we were boyfriend/girlfriend, he is always the one who waits for me whenever we have a date or just meeting. now that we're married he always makes me wait and i hate it! he always have a reason for this and i think its valid because he is a hardworking person. but i hate waiting! actually im waiting now in the office for him to fetch me. and he's late again!

2006-09-19 22:08:53 · 22 answers · asked by leviosa 2

the love of my life has dumped me cuz he thinks i cheated on him i did not i only senthis m8 dirty txts as joke my chp doh want me????how can i get him back?

2006-09-19 22:04:23 · 19 answers · asked by skinnyminniekitten 1

Someone asked if monogamy was natural and everyone who answered agreed it wasn't. Yet, people are shocked by my questions about my wife having a boyfriend. Why is that?

2006-09-19 21:54:29 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-09-19 21:53:36 · 30 answers · asked by asylumseeker 1

We met when we were young and fell deeply in love after a year of friendship. Circumstances pulled us apart, but never far enough so as not to still love and want each other even with other partners. We have both since married and I have a daughter. He contacted me and we met and made love. I ended it and told him that it was the last time we'd ever see each other. Its been almost a year and he's found me again and I find myself obsessing about him. His marriage is on the rocks and mine, although I love my husband, has never been very strong. I keep thinking of my daughter and how this would affect her not to mention my husband and what this would do to him. My family will be emigrating, which is why my lover and I wanted to meet up one last time, but I'm torn...please help me.

2006-09-19 21:46:16 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous

On what basis will the church divorce a married couple?

2006-09-19 21:43:01 · 7 answers · asked by gg 1

i exerted so much effort to change him but nothing happens. i am married with him for more than 20 yrs. am i a martyr wife. what to do next pls help. he doesnt want divorse

2006-09-19 21:41:48 · 23 answers · asked by suri 1

2006-09-19 21:35:23 · 2 answers · asked by suri 1

Married for 8 months and 4 days after we got married he left for Iraq. Argue constantly. No communication at all. We love each other so much. Do we need counseling or something.

2006-09-19 21:28:47 · 21 answers · asked by chakaree 2

2006-09-19 21:28:22 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-09-19 21:11:45 · 11 answers · asked by Pallie 2

2006-09-19 21:04:18 · 26 answers · asked by wife of Ali Pasha 3

2006-09-19 21:00:53 · 13 answers · asked by Erik G 1

I am 33 and have 2 beautiful children. I love my hubby very much but deep down I feel I want more. I had a career that I was thriving in until my 1st child came along. My husband decided that my career is on stand until my 2 bubs have grown. I am at home with them growing with them day by day, but I want more. My husband as nice as he is expects me to cook, clean, clean the car, look after the kids, do the groceries, look after 'several' investment properties and pamper him as he is quite busy with his demanding career. Thats fine and I understand that he is the bread winner and I should be very happy that I have the opportunity to stay home with my kids, but sometimes I feel I am not cut out to be the 'housewife'. I want more. I want to work and be who I was, I done want to ask him all the time if I can spend x amount of $ to buy this or that. I feel like a slave and he has taken full advantage of me, he comes home and picks on what has not been done, and so on.

2006-09-19 20:52:04 · 19 answers · asked by sid98gal 1

Is it :
a plain street slut
an adulterer (an unfaithful wife)
or a unmarried "open door"

2006-09-19 20:30:02 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

I wanted to be cute before our wedding, which is next month, and "get married" online... Because we are both always on the computer at work. Does anyone know of a fun website where we could do that?? It would be especially nice if I could "marry" him while he was at work, and while I'm at school. I just know it would make his day. Thanks!

2006-09-19 20:14:24 · 4 answers · asked by shelly 2

I truly trust my spouse but I work in a high stress protection job overseas in the middle east! I asked her not to talk or go out with certain people while I was gone. I do trust her and I do believe in her independence, but I do not need the stress of worrying about how these single male friends may try to take advantage of my being gone! I do not care if they talk on the phone but would prefer they not meet for drinks or come over to my house or her to theirs while I am away. Bare in mind I have never met any of these people!

2006-09-19 20:12:15 · 24 answers · asked by marine_one1996 1

hi everyone. i actually dont need advices, just opinions. i am married 2 years already, am young-23. we had a child who died.
he is far away for 4 months already. and i feel i dont luv him anymore. i feel he is myfriend, we talk by phone, write, but i cant even say "baby" to him or"miss u" coz i dont miss him at all.
i can ttell him this things, and dont know if i should do this. if i stay with him the rest of my life i know it will be ok-a good calm respectfull husband, a big house , car, maybe children.
but i cant even imagine to let him touch me, or kiss or make luv. mabey there's somebody who experienced the same?! pls give ur opinion.

2006-09-19 20:04:31 · 17 answers · asked by notme 2

My wife thanks seperate bank accounts andother trivial things should be different and I am old school and think we should share these things!

2006-09-19 20:03:48 · 8 answers · asked by marine_one1996 1

OK, I met a guy online a few months ago.....we talked on the phone for a while. We decided we were gonna wait 1 year to meet in person. We just wanted to get to know each other on a different level first without any "strings". There was no "cybering" as people put it....we just met in a chat room and things took off from there. I fell head over heals with this guy over the phone. All of the sudden he tells me he is going to try to work things out with his ex wife "for the sake of the kids" . So, we backed off and didn't talk for a month. He calls me tonight out of the clear blue sky....tells me he actually has custody of the kids she just gave them up...and he misses me, and he thought about me everyday....yadayadayada.....I missed him too, and I want to talk to him to but I am so scared of getting hurt again. I am not a desperate person, we just have so much in common and he can make me laugh, and oh ya all know....he is "everything I would want in a man". Do I give him another chance

2006-09-19 19:54:21 · 17 answers · asked by justhanginout 2

2006-09-19 19:53:57 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous