Jokes & Riddles - September 2006

How many flowers do I have if all of them are roses except two, all of them are tulips except two, and all of them are daisies except two?

2006-09-30 11:34:03 · 14 answers · asked by Silver Spoon 4

JOKE NUM. 1
Knock Knock???
Whos there?
Ketchup
Ketchup who?
CATCH UP WITH YOUR HOMEWORK OR YOU WILL FALL BEHIND!!!!

JOKE NUM 2

a baby juss swallowed a pen...
the mother worried, called the doctor and asked for help
the doctor : meanwhile use a pencil then....! ahahahaha..

2006-09-30 11:21:50 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

OH gag me!!!!

2006-09-30 11:08:56 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-09-30 11:08:47 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

He's been a huge pain today, but I don't exactly know how to get him, and what do I do once I pull?

2006-09-30 10:44:19 · 7 answers · asked by Susie 1

what's the meaning of "imao" ?

2006-09-30 10:43:52 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

they asked a stupid man: why you killed ur father?
he answers: there was a trip for people whom parents has died
they asked again:then why you killed ur uncle?
he answers:because i wanted my cousin to go to the trip with me
then they asked: then why you wanted to kill ur self?
he answers:because the trip was cancelled.

2006-09-30 10:42:15 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this, the wife wants him to quit; she gets two shot glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey.

After getting him to the table that had the glasses, she brings his bait box. She says "I want you to see this." She puts a worm in the water it, and it swims around.

She puts a worm in the whiskey, and the worm dies immediately. She then says, feeling that she has made her point clear, "what do you have to say about this experiment?"

He responds by saying: "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"

2006-09-30 10:41:12 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

Im working on a SATURDAY, and I really want to hear some good jokes to keep me laughing. Have any? Share. I'll start off:
Why does Micheal Jackson like 27 yr olds?
Because there are 27 of them. lol

2006-09-30 10:36:56 · 30 answers · asked by Brittney 5

a snake bite a silly man, the man laughed and laughed, the snake asked him why r u laughing although i bite u
the man answered: because i've AIDs

2006-09-30 10:30:50 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

what is round.has a whole.people can put their finger in the whole.and every one that used it enjoys it.

what is it??????

2006-09-30 10:26:15 · 8 answers · asked by boricua(787) 3

Which is it, do you know...
spit -or- swallow ~*~ both ~*~ gargle

2006-09-30 10:22:12 · 7 answers · asked by Illusion 2

what's ur opinion about this joke?

a person take the medecine before it's time, why?
to surprise the virus

2006-09-30 10:16:25 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

In the office building at night they let the guard dogs out to protect against intruders,one night a german sheppard got caught short and made a big puddel in the middle of and office floor,the next morning the boss comes in and sees the puddle and turns to his secretary,and ask is that URINE,the secretary replies it's not mine.

2006-09-30 10:09:07 · 8 answers · asked by kman1830 5

Clues 1- I am in a cold climate in North America.
2-Minnesoeta is my neighbour
3- I was once 2 cities but now am 1
4- I have a population of more than 100.000 Less than 200,000
5- Paul Schafer( From David Letterman) and Neil Young both lived here at one point
6-I have a giant that is sleeping
7-I am the head of the largest freshwater lake in the world

2006-09-30 09:58:42 · 27 answers · asked by JewelsH 2

You are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your left side is a valley and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping pig which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is a helicopter flying at ground level. Both the giant pig and the helicopter are also traveling at the same speed as you.

What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?

2006-09-30 09:52:31 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous

Whenever I wake up my underwear is always riding up my bum. Why is this?

Is it because they are too tight, but 'saggy' in the back? What would you do/say if you were here?

2006-09-30 09:40:40 · 18 answers · asked by GB 1

What can you stand in front of in broad daylight and not see even if you have perfect eyesight.

AND NO! It's not air or oxygen, or germs, or bacteria, or molocues.

Its made of metal or wood. Sometimes you can see it.
And its powerful

2006-09-30 09:33:52 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

a man drove all the way from new york to san francisco only to discover at the end of the trip that he had a flat tire from the very start.yet his car was completely unaffected by it.how is this possible????

2006-09-30 09:26:56 · 6 answers · asked by liju v 2

I put this in the right category TRUST ME!!!!!

2006-09-30 09:24:47 · 24 answers · asked by harrypotterschick07 2

No kidding, it came up in a Yahoo! question and I'm not sure what it means? (Sorry, not even sure which section is right for this question)

2006-09-30 09:23:20 · 13 answers · asked by GB 1

to join PETA

2006-09-30 09:23:07 · 13 answers · asked by harrypotterschick07 2

Guatemala, Belize, El Salvador, Honduras, Nicaragua, _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _, Panama

2006-09-30 09:15:10 · 9 answers · asked by Socastee_Angel 2

2006-09-30 09:15:03 · 14 answers · asked by ? 4

Okay, now only my tech teacher got it right away. Everyone else...dumbfounded.

Three men are stranded on an island. All the same age, single, same religion, and each do not have any family to go back to. But they have different philoshiphies (forgive me if I misspelled it). They are all healthy. And NONE OF THEM believe in reancarnation

One day they run out of food, so they decide one of them has to die for the other two to eat. They quickly decide who will be eaten, even the one chosen thought it was a good ideal...why?

2006-09-30 09:08:34 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

This is going to make you so MAD! There are three words in the English language that end in "gry". ONE is angry and the other is hungry. EveryONE knows what the third ONE means and what it stands for. EveryONE uses them everyday, and if you listened very carefully, I've given you the third word. What is it? _______gry

2006-09-30 09:06:02 · 30 answers · asked by mr_spike432 2

lol, her teacher told her to go home and do an essay,lol

sorry if anyone get offended, but when i heard it it was hilarious, plus

2006-09-30 09:05:01 · 13 answers · asked by mssjj87 2

kick hs sister in the chin,lol,

when i first hear this i really didnt get it

2006-09-30 09:02:46 · 14 answers · asked by mssjj87 2

just ad watter!

2006-09-30 08:44:15 · 9 answers · asked by daidiiro 2

Police say he Topped himself!

2006-09-30 08:41:55 · 18 answers · asked by sashlou 3