Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

Who's buried in Grants tomb?

2006-07-24 13:34:41 · 10 answers · asked by lesmizman67 1

What is green and smells like a skunk? Someone asked me this at work and I have no idea what the answer is. I guessed poo but I guess I was wrong.

2006-07-24 13:27:33 · 14 answers · asked by HOT A$S 2

one sunday morning this guy gave to church one million $ so the church man said the nexts sunday we should offer the guy 3 hems so the next sunday they found out that he was gay but they didnt care it was a million $ so all the church men came up and called the guy o come up to pick his hems so the uy looked at all the men and said ill that him him and him

2006-07-24 13:24:07 · 4 answers · asked by amy 1

Boo!

2006-07-24 13:18:41 · 32 answers · asked by nikki -nicole 3

looking for somtin funny. (yes i know i spelt somthing wrong)

2006-07-24 13:10:22 · 9 answers · asked by spring goth 3

if a tree falls in the forest do the trees laugh at it?still just bein silly

2006-07-24 12:57:51 · 13 answers · asked by jolenex101 2

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
"I was raised in the West. The west of Texas. It's pretty close to California. In more ways than Washington, D.C., is close to California."

"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"

"What I am against is quotas. I am against hard quotas, quotas they basically delineate based upon whatever. However they delineate, quotas, I think, vulcanize society. So I don't know how that fits into what everybody else is saying, their relative positions, but that's my position."

"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."

"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'."

"If you're sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign."

"We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself."

"The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case."

"If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura."

2006-07-24 12:56:54 · 8 answers · asked by maidenrocks 3

2006-07-24 12:56:26 · 10 answers · asked by cashdog137 3

Below are six sets of five letters each. These six sets of letters contain the same ten letters between them. These ten letters are C, G, H, I, O, P, R, S, T, Y. Your job is to figure out the order for these ten letters. In any given set, the letters are in order as they will appear when you are done. For example, in the first set, SGIYP, S comes before G, G comes before I, I comes before Y, and Y comes before P.

Once you have the order of the ten letters, reverse them to make a common ten letter word.

S-G-I-Y-P
T-H-R-P-O
S-T-I-Y-C
T-G-R-O-C
H-G-R-Y-O
S-T-I-R-P

2006-07-24 12:54:00 · 3 answers · asked by big_dave_x 4

WILL THEY GET A DIVORSE? CAZ LOL. WILL THEY MAKE 889 BABYS? LOL

2006-07-24 12:52:05 · 2 answers · asked by KYthehumpit ₪scrappyboy₪ 1

A Licker Locker !!

2006-07-24 12:27:58 · 26 answers · asked by kellysimmons@btopenworld.com 1

2006-07-24 12:25:25 · 4 answers · asked by Emmagine(imagine) 3

spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
George Best

An inch or two either side of the post and that would have been a goal.
Dave Bassett, Sky Sports

Ardiles strokes the ball like it is part of his own anatomy.
Jimmy Magee, RTE

Gary always weighed up his options, especially when he had no choice.
Kevin Keegan, Radio 5 live

This is really a lovely horse, I once rode her mother.
Ted Walsh ( Horse Racing Commentator)

I would not say he ( David Ginola) is the best left winger in the Premiership, but there are none better.
Ron Atkinson

He dribbles a lot and the opposition don't like it - you can see it all over their faces.
Ron Atkinson

I never comment on referees and I'm not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat.
Norman Whiteside

It took a lot of bottle for Tony (Adams) to own up.
Ian Wright ( commenting on his teammate's alcoholism)

I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country.
Ian Rush

Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of Oxford crew.
Harry Carpenter ( BBC TV Boat Race 1977)

Here we are in the Holy Land of Israel - a Mecca for tourists.
David Vine

Morcelli has four fastest 1500-metre times ever. And all those times are at 1500 metres.
David Coleman

Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field.
Metro Radio

..and later we will have action from the men's cockless pairs ...
Sue Barker

Her time is about 4.33, which she's capable of
David Coleman

Dennis Pennis: 'Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography ?'
Chris Eubank: ' On what ? '

Grand National winning jockey Mark Fitzgerald: 'Sex is an anti-climax after that !'

To play Holland, you have to play the Dutch.
Ruud Gullit

Well , either side could win it, or it could be a draw.
Ron Atkinson

For those of you watching in Black and White, Spurs are in the all-yellow strip
John Motson

Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.
David Acfield

What will you do when you leave football, Jack - will you stay in football ?
Stuart Hall ( Radio 5 live )

We'll still be happy if we lose. It's on at the same time as the Beer Festival
Noel O' Mahony, Cork City boss before the game in Munich

I'd like to play for an Italian club , like Barcelona
Mark Draper (Aston Villa )

2006-07-24 12:18:27 · 9 answers · asked by maidenrocks 3

Can you tell me how to get to Seasame Street?...

2006-07-24 11:58:34 · 17 answers · asked by jrm_jab 2

True bravery is arriving home really late after a boy's night out and really drunk, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and still having the guts to ask...

Are you cleaning, or were you flying somewhere"? lol






"

2006-07-24 11:56:26 · 9 answers · asked by maidenrocks 3

what is the rest of the limerick "there once was a girl from
Nantucket"

2006-07-24 11:53:22 · 9 answers · asked by cathyl1226 3

2006-07-24 11:43:24 · 8 answers · asked by THINKER 2

if u were 2 step in2 a sealed room filled with 100% methane gas and strike a match, wot would happen??????

2006-07-24 11:35:20 · 9 answers · asked by little_hen_uk 3

"There's a snake!!"

Hot damn y'all got some slow reflexes..


Don't trip.

2006-07-24 11:29:53 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

Any rude humor, or just stuff thats funny. Thanks

2006-07-24 11:07:54 · 13 answers · asked by HeaRTbRoKeN 1

That`s for all

2006-07-24 11:03:27 · 9 answers · asked by wael 2

(If 7-11 is open 24/7/365, why do they have locks on their doors?)

kind of like these...
http://www.ahajokes.com/random_fun_thoughts.shtml
http://expage.com/thingstowonder
http://expage.com/starrlite8
http://www.geocities.com/ml25/current.html
http://home.nycap.rr.com/hrickard/i_wonder_why.htm
http://www.jokesnjokes.net/funny.jokes.amusing.humor.laughs/Wisdom/ponder01.htm
http://www.kubik.org/lighter/think.htm
http://www.pagetutor.com/jokebreak/140.html
http://www.johnandtrish.com/wandw/jokes.html
http://www.plumbingsupply.com/life.html
http://www.some-guy.com/quotes/why.html
http://casunsetz.com/thoughts2.htm
http://www.angelfire.com/ok5/french/thoughts.html
http://www.aboundinglove.org/outreach/or-022.php
http://kan-7880-ptld-j.livejournal.com/
http://1falcon1.tripod.com/id38.html
http://us.geocities.com/SoHo/7373/ponder.htm
http://www.futurelooks.com/forums/showthread.php?t=6719

you can give me some websites or just some that you know...

2006-07-24 10:47:26 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

Something begining with D

2006-07-24 10:46:42 · 22 answers · asked by ,¸¸,ø¤ºLouis Vuittonº¤ø,¸¸, 1

something beginning with C

2006-07-24 10:41:55 · 43 answers · asked by ,¸¸,ø¤ºLouis Vuittonº¤ø,¸¸, 1

if you give a riddle include the answer

2006-07-24 10:30:26 · 12 answers · asked by Bruins Fan 6

The most burps gets the 10 points

2006-07-24 10:20:21 · 13 answers · asked by dishwasher67 6

2006-07-24 10:10:30 · 10 answers · asked by tata brada 2

2006-07-24 10:08:56 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous

No offensive or sexually implicit sh!t por favor..

Yeah right.. F$%* what I just said.

Seriously, keep it clean but feel free to be wild.

yeah right...

*@@#* !

2006-07-24 09:59:38 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

So if a fat person falls in the forest and no one is around do the trees laugh?

2006-07-24 09:50:30 · 11 answers · asked by jcab20055 2