Jokes & Riddles - June 2006

2006-06-15 09:59:26 · 16 answers · asked by johnny idaho 1

check out http://jokesrus.ds4a.com

2006-06-15 09:53:43 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

Is It Orange ?

2006-06-15 09:52:45 · 12 answers · asked by Diddy 2

if you were paid money to put a pie in a celebrities face which male and female would you choose

2006-06-15 09:37:53 · 16 answers · asked by cricketfan82 4

The Iraqi Ambassador to the UN was walking down the hallway and bumped into President Bush.
Hoping to break the ice with an innocuous comment, the ambassador quickly said, "Respectfully, sir. I have a question about what I’ve seen in America."
Politely, President Bush answered, "If I can help explain things to you, please let me know."
The Iraqi whispered. "My little girl watches this show called 'Star Trek' and in this show, there’s Chekov who is a Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Sulu who is Chinese… but there aren't any Iraqis. Why aren’t there any Iraqis on Star Trek?".
President Bush whispered back to the ambassador, "It's because Star Trek takes place in the future."

2006-06-15 09:37:37 · 23 answers · asked by Chino 3

this 8 year old kid went on a public bus to visit his dad a few miles away. he sat down behind the bus drivers and talked to him all the way. The kid sayed said if my dad was a tiger and my mom was a tiger i would be a little tiger. If my dad was a elephant and my mom was a elephant i'll be a litle elephant. All ready annyoned by the kids words the bus driver sayed " what if your mom was a prostitute and your dad was a pimp, what would you be. The kid answerd. A bus driver

2006-06-15 09:32:44 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

What's your favorite joke or riddle?

2006-06-15 09:24:12 · 16 answers · asked by Kajunfriend2006 2

2006-06-15 09:19:55 · 16 answers · asked by Felicia Fox 6

2006-06-15 09:19:40 · 5 answers · asked by Renu M 1

please list for me all those little abbreviations like LOL, RMFAO etc, ok I'm a little off the date an all (but not sooo much)
THANK YOU, THANK YOU

2006-06-15 09:08:33 · 12 answers · asked by 【ツ】ρεαcε! 5

2006-06-15 09:06:46 · 13 answers · asked by Felicia Fox 6

little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've passed gas at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was passing gas because they don't smell and are silent." The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next week." The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what medicine you gave me, but now my gas, although still silent, smells terrible." The doctor says, "Good!!! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."

2006-06-15 09:03:29 · 19 answers · asked by poLar0!d 1

This little kindergarden boy goes with his mom...

boy: Mommy, in school they told me that I'm crazy....
Mom: Who told you that!?
boy: THE ******* BIRDS!!!!

2006-06-15 08:55:29 · 22 answers · asked by georgeiq 2

10. Hey! Now there's a gift!

9. Well, well, well...

8. Boy, if I had not recently shot up 4 sizes that would've fit.

7. This is perfect for wearing around the basement.

6. Gosh. I hope this never catches fire! It is fire season though. There are lots of unexplained fires.

5. If the dog buries it, I'll be furious!

4. I love it - but I fear the jealousy it will inspire.

3. Sadly, tomorrow I enter the Federal Witness Protection Program.

2. To think I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts to charity.

1. I really don't deserve this.

2006-06-15 08:51:07 · 11 answers · asked by poLar0!d 1

i loveeee this freakin joke....everytime i hear it i die, but its sooo lame......okay.....
Q. why was the collusium so windy?
A. cuz it was full of fans!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahhaah

2006-06-15 08:49:55 · 34 answers · asked by playaninstrument 3

Its like 1 foot long. My favorite childhood candy is stuck all over it, so it makes it all bumpy. Its colorful and its highly addictive. I think its been introduced a few years ago but I only discovered it last year. Its turned into one of my favorite candies! They do not exist in all countries yet, but the individual ingredients that makes up the candy are well known. They come in a purple packaging. What is it?

2006-06-15 08:48:03 · 6 answers · asked by Sean I.T ? 7

2006-06-15 08:46:01 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

Guess a famous person

2006-06-15 08:40:32 · 7 answers · asked by LetMEtell&AskYOU 5

Is the truth always better then living a lie; in the Matrix they had everything. In the real world they had nothing.

2006-06-15 08:35:10 · 9 answers · asked by Jman 1

I won't be offended because I like honesty

2006-06-15 08:19:38 · 12 answers · asked by Jesus Christ 1

This thing is for you... But you cannot buy it for your self... and if you buy it.. you cant use it.. and when you use it.. you wont feel it and you wont know you're using it...

2006-06-15 08:15:25 · 11 answers · asked by KumaR 1

What goes up, but at the same time goes down, up to the sky and down to the ground, my present tense and my past tense too, lets go for a ride just me and you...what am i?

2006-06-15 08:02:17 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

a total jerk,

2006-06-15 08:00:17 · 8 answers · asked by duc602 7

There are 100 light bulbs lined up in a row in a long room. Each bulb has its own switch and is currently switched off. The room has an entry door and an exit door. There are 100 people lined up outside the entry door. Each bulb is numbered consecutively from 1 to 100. So is each person. Person No. 1 enters the room, switches on every bulb, and exits. Person No. 2 enters and flips the switch on every second bulb (turning off bulbs 2, 4, 6, …). Person No. 3 enters and flips the switch on every third bulb (changing the state on bulbs 3, 6, 9, …). This continues until all 100 people have passed through the room. What is the final state of bulb No. 64? And how many of the light bulbs are illuminated after the 100th person has passed through the room?

2006-06-15 07:56:20 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-15 07:50:54 · 22 answers · asked by traveso 1

Be fuuny and original.

2006-06-15 07:39:45 · 75 answers · asked by Anonymous

name for a girl that starts with a p?? First thing that pops in your brain please!

2006-06-15 07:39:09 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

I am going to have to take prozac and exlax so I can sit on the toilet all day and feel good about it.

2006-06-15 07:38:53 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous

A Really Bad Day
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

2006-06-15 07:32:40 · 9 answers · asked by ♠Tatsuko♠ 2

A man walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water. The bartender then pulls out a gun and points it at the man. The man then says, "Thank you," and leaves. How come?

2006-06-15 07:30:28 · 14 answers · asked by Caitybell 1