Jokes & Riddles - June 2006

A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he had found a cat, but it was dead.
"How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked.

"Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," he innocently answered.

"You did WHAT?!!" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.

"You know," the boy explained, "I leaned over and said, "Pssst!" and it didn't move."

2006-06-12 12:53:45 · 14 answers · asked by deed 5

The maker doesn't want it.
The person who brought it don't use it
The user never sees it.
What is it?

2006-06-12 12:53:32 · 8 answers · asked by cawhiteak 1

ODAKLE STE??


:-)

2006-06-12 12:53:00 · 16 answers · asked by Kraljica Katica 7

2006-06-12 12:52:38 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous

to start you off it is a boy's name first one to get it gets the 10 points!!!

2006-06-12 12:43:38 · 12 answers · asked by Jasmine 2

2006-06-12 12:42:16 · 18 answers · asked by baldyhugsblues 5

An exasperated Mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him, "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"

The little boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll run in and out, in and out and keep slamming the door until St Peter says, "For Heavens' sake, Michael, come in or stay out."

2006-06-12 12:36:19 · 5 answers · asked by deed 5

well have you?

2006-06-12 12:36:14 · 7 answers · asked by fukitol 1

KOLIKO GODINA IMATE ???

:-))

2006-06-12 12:30:06 · 21 answers · asked by Kraljica Katica 7

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part where Chicken Little warns the farmer. She read, "...and Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling!"

She then asked, "And what do you think that farmer said?"

One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said Holy Ch*t! A talking chicken!"

The teacher was unable to teach for the next ten minutes...

2006-06-12 12:28:49 · 9 answers · asked by deed 5

?

2006-06-12 12:28:46 · 15 answers · asked by fukitol 1

2006-06-12 12:19:57 · 4 answers · asked by Quack Man 1

I wanna be a pop singer, then I would get rich and I would buy a ranch.

What do you wanna do when you grow up?

2006-06-12 12:09:44 · 14 answers · asked by Quack Man 1

2006-06-12 12:01:33 · 18 answers · asked by Richard B 1

2006-06-12 11:57:08 · 6 answers · asked by Richard B 1

there a hole, theres a hole, theres a hole at the bottom of the sea.

2006-06-12 11:55:30 · 11 answers · asked by skateboardgrindzero 2

2006-06-12 11:52:28 · 7 answers · asked by Coffee-Infused Insomniac 3

2006-06-12 11:49:59 · 9 answers · asked by Richard B 1

figure it out for 12 points:D

2006-06-12 11:48:56 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-12 11:48:12 · 16 answers · asked by Richard B 1

2006-06-12 11:35:35 · 11 answers · asked by Coffee-Infused Insomniac 3

2006-06-12 11:26:46 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

A man is walking on the beach,
just after taking a long swim in his clothes. He sees a restaurant on the beach.
He walks into the restaurant and gets seated. He looks at the menu and orders
seagull soup. The waitress brings out the soup, he takes one bite, realizes
something & runs out onto the road and gets killed.



The question is: why did he freak out?

2006-06-12 11:26:12 · 21 answers · asked by ineedlotsofhelp118 2

2006-06-12 11:23:48 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

a pizza will feed a family an african american wont!!!

2006-06-12 11:17:08 · 5 answers · asked by imanigerwannasteal 1

A man walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water. The bartender then pulls out a gun and points it at the man. The man then says, "Thank you," and leaves. How come?

2006-06-12 11:17:03 · 9 answers · asked by Ladylucious 2

2006-06-12 10:52:57 · 11 answers · asked by imanigerwannasteal 1

I'm really bored and I need a good laugh...
Some yo mammam dumb blondes, and funny jokes... Thanks :)

2006-06-12 10:34:31 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

done by first graders...6-year-olds!

Don't change horses... ...until they stop running.
Strike while the... ...bug is close.
It's always darkest before... ...Daylight Saving Time.
Never underestimate the power of... ...termites.
You can lead a horse to water but... ...how?
Don't bite the hand that... ...looks dirty.
No news is... ...impossible.
A miss is as good as a... ...Mr.
You can't teach an old dog new... ...math.
If you lie down with dogs, you'll... ...stink in the morning.
Love all, trust... ...me.
The pen is mightier than the... ...pigs.
An idle mind is... ...the best way to relax.
Where there's smoke, there's... ...pollution.
Happy the bride who... ...gets all the presents.
A penny saved is... ...not much.
Two's company, three's... ...the Musketeers.
Don't put off till tomorrow what... ...you put on to go to bed.
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and... ...you have to blow your nose.
There are none so blind as... ...Stevie Wonder.
Children should be seen and not... ...spanked or grounded.
If at first you don't succeed... ...get new batteries.
You get out of something only what you... ...see in the picture on the box.
When the blind lead the blind... ...get out of the way.
Better late than... ...pregnant.

2006-06-12 10:32:07 · 9 answers · asked by Clyde 5

We all lose those we love.
We never realize,
That they were sent from above.
All those little things you’d say,
To brighten up my day.

Then they're gone,
And we have nothing to lean on.
For never noticing them,
As we should.
and not always doing our best for them,
As we could.

More often then not I’d just ignore,
Those who I should be fighting for.
I never thought about when you’d be gone,
But now the distance seems so long.
I never did notice my best friend,
A concept I didn’t comprehend

So now that I remember to say,
I hope this brightens up your day.
Now that you've moved on,
I miss you now that you're gone

2006-06-12 10:07:05 · 12 answers · asked by emwads 3