Jokes & Riddles - January 2007

here is a hint
Technically, there are 2 true answer

2007-01-25 13:54:04 · 10 answers · asked by bevi 2

He's really funny. One of his jokes was like: "when you're talking to someone, and you say that 'I like children', be careful that you're not being too specific... you can't say things like - 'I like twelve-year-olds'."

2007-01-25 13:50:44 · 7 answers · asked by sincere12_26 4

2007-01-25 13:48:45 · 20 answers · asked by mindy 2

They found her face down in Ricki Lake.

2007-01-25 13:45:46 · 9 answers · asked by Commander 3

Joe loves to create confusion. One Tuesday he sent an e-mail memo to his secretary that said, "I'll be back in the office three days before one week after the day after tomorrow."

When would he be back?

2007-01-25 13:38:07 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

I just got a gig doing trivia on Wednesday Nights, and I am a little unsure of the formatics. ! was going to do 3 rounds of 10 questions. In between the rounds, play some music, and go over the answers for the first round, and give out small prizes, Or should I wait until the end to reveal all the answers, and check them myself or have people check their own or swap with another team. Help! What would be the best flow?

2007-01-25 13:23:56 · 3 answers · asked by ALive 3

A young couple got married and they were both virgins and very shy. As the weeks went they were both to shy to ask the other for sex. They decided to try a sex therapist. They told the therapist their problem and he said it was easy. He said that the woman could call herself the washing machine and the man could call himself the washing. They went home and tried it. The woman said to the man "Darling would you like to do your washing in my washing machine?" All went well for months then one night the man said "Darling can I do my washing in your washing machine?" to which his wife replied, "No my washing machine's broke so you'll have to do your washing by hand!!!"

2007-01-25 13:01:38 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

1. I have a face , that can not see , and I have two hands but can not hold.

2. What keys can not open door ?

3. What two things can not eat for breakfast ?

2007-01-25 12:54:44 · 9 answers · asked by Pretty woman 1

2007-01-25 12:50:19 · 8 answers · asked by lashandra p 1

There once was a lady who was tired of living alone. So she put an ad in the paper which outlined her requirements. She wanted a man who 1) would treat her nicely, 2) wouldn't run away from her, and 3) would be good in bed. Then, one day, she heard the doorbell ring. She answered it, and there on the front porch was a man in a wheel chair who didn't have any arms or legs.
"I'm here about the ad you put in the paper. As you can see, I have no arms so I can't beat you, and I have no legs so I can't run away from you."

"Yes, but are you good in bed?"

"How do you think I rang the doorbell?"

2007-01-25 12:49:26 · 15 answers · asked by RuKuS 4

A woman goes into a bar and orders 2 double whiskys. She sits down and drinks one and throws the other up her skirt. She then goes back to the bar and orders the same, sits down drinks one and throws the other up her skirt. The bar tender observes this and when she returns back to the bar for another round he asks her why she drinks one and throws the other up her skirt. She said that she had won the lottery and was celebrating. The bar tender said that he could understand her drinking but why was she throwing whisky up her skirt to which she repiled "Well it's the only c**t that's getting a drink out off me!!!"

2007-01-25 12:46:13 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-01-25 12:36:53 · 8 answers · asked by sexy nikki 2

ok.. what is something that has 7 letters, it says the same thing reading it forwards and backwards.. and they mean the same thing....... anyone know??

2007-01-25 12:17:14 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

Can you figure out which one is which.

First person: I'm the ambiguous one.
Second person: That's not true.
Thrid person: I'm not the ambiguous one.

>.<

2007-01-25 12:11:16 · 10 answers · asked by bluecymbals04 2

This can fit the smallest mouse's mouth but not on the Titanic. Humans can eat it but cannot digest it. It glows bright in the dark and fades away in the light. When lit on fire it remains that way forever. What is it?

2007-01-25 12:06:26 · 52 answers · asked by call the owls 4

Around me now are 56 with names. I can assure you all, I'm not playing games. Nine have no names, some are giants and one steals fire. One is the mother of love and sexual desire. I look different than others of my kind..but it is my name that you must find!

2007-01-25 11:54:07 · 17 answers · asked by corylingard 2

"What do you call a brunette with bad breath?"

"A blonde standing on her head".

2007-01-25 11:46:59 · 15 answers · asked by Commander 3

There is a married couple, the wife found out the husband was cheating. She shot him..put him under water..and she hung him. He apologized. Then took her to dinner. How is this possible?
A riddle to all..............

2007-01-25 11:36:03 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

What is da funniest thing ever? I am really in the mood 2 laugh...

2007-01-25 11:34:42 · 17 answers · asked by Akon_luva_13 2

How did the redneck die drinking milk?


The cow sat on him!

2007-01-25 11:27:19 · 10 answers · asked by buickbeast 3

2007-01-25 11:24:56 · 21 answers · asked by mumsabout 2

2007-01-25 11:15:58 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

Why don' rabbits make noise when mating?......

...cause they have cotton balls...lol

2007-01-25 11:13:53 · 15 answers · asked by *SexXyLuV* 3

2007-01-25 11:04:38 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous

Here is one ; I am getting carried away and must start behaving myself:)

Man who walks through doorways sideways with erection is always going to Bangkok.

2007-01-25 11:04:19 · 1 answers · asked by Duisend-poot 7

into a phsyciatrist office wraped in syranwrap
The doctor looks at him and says, O.K. I CAN SEE YOUR NUTS!

2007-01-25 11:01:03 · 9 answers · asked by Chloe 4

it is a 2 letter word and starts with a

2007-01-25 10:54:26 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

ok there was a little girl in sunday school and her teacher wanted to ask he 3 questions so she did.
The first question was "who made the earth"
that boy next to her poked her in the hip with a pencil and
she yelled GOD ALMIGHTY
so her teacher asked her the next question
"who got pined to the cross for r sins"
and the boy poked her with the pencil
she yelled JESUS CHRIST
so her teacher asked her the next question and
it was "what did eve say to adam while they were makin babys" and the boy poked her with the pencil and she yelled
IF U POKE ME WITH THAT THING IM GOING TO BREAK IT IN HALF.
HAHAHA

2007-01-25 10:54:22 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-01-25 10:52:56 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-01-25 10:49:59 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous