Jokes & Riddles - June 2006

Sandy began a job as an elementary school counselor and she was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.

Sandy approached and asked if she was all right.

The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself.

Approaching again, Sandy offered, "Would you like me to be your friend?"

The girl hesitated, then said, "Okay," looking at the woman suspiciously.

Feeling she was making progress, Sandy then asked, "Why are you standing here all alone?"

"Because," the little girl said with great exasperation, "I'm the goalie!"

2006-06-10 11:24:23 · 29 answers · asked by Aaron 1

2006-06-10 11:19:23 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-10 10:41:45 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-10 10:38:07 · 19 answers · asked by miami gal(305) 1

2006-06-10 10:18:51 · 6 answers · asked by Nivek69 1

Teethmarks on the toilet seat and footmarks on the door.
10 pts for the best one that is higher than mine...

2006-06-10 10:16:35 · 6 answers · asked by Featherman 5

A girl goes on a first date with this fellow and he takes her to a carnival. He asks her "What do you want to do"? and she says " I want to get weighed" So they go to the guesser and he guesses 120 and she weighs 117 so he gets his dollar back. A short while later he again asks her :what do you want to do? and again she says "I want to get weighed" so they go back to the guesser and this time he guesses right and he loses his dollar. They get something to eat and then he asks her " what do you want to do? And she says I want to get weighed" By this time he is thinking she is really weird and decides to end the date and take her home. They shake hands and that's the end of the date. Her roommate Laura asks her How did it go? and she answers " Oh Waura, it was wousy!

2006-06-10 10:12:18 · 14 answers · asked by xKati 2

maybe I would got some huh?...Ah well, maybe it's not in the stars. However, 6/10 is another day...or maybe I should just wait for 9/6 and sleep back to back.

Anyone have any nice 6/9 experiences yesterday?

2006-06-10 09:55:42 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

Pronounced as one letter,
And written with three,
Two letters there are,
And two only in me.
I'm double, I'm single,
I'm black, blue, and gray,
I'm read from both ends,
And the same either way.
What am I?

2006-06-10 09:36:35 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

dil tadap tadap ke kah raha hai aa bhi ja,tu humse aankh naa chura tujhe kasam hai aa bhi ja

2006-06-10 08:49:02 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

There is this 3 floored apartment. ON the 1st floor, there is this police. On the 2nd floor, there is this blind man, and on the 3rd, there is this sexy lady that has just moved in. So the police brings a welcome cake to the 3rd floor. The sexy woman comes out in a robe. He starts drooling and then says" here a couples of your cup ca- i mean a cake for u. " "Thanx." says the woman. The next day, The blind man comes over. "Since the man is blind, I should probably answer the door naked" So he rings the doorbell. DING DONG!! "Thats him" she says. " I have some news for u!!!!" says the man anxiously." I just got surgerey on my eyes!! Im not blind anymore!!!!!"

2006-06-10 08:36:19 · 33 answers · asked by yoiamcoolio 2

2006-06-10 08:20:05 · 13 answers · asked by Prufrock 4

On a hot summer day, two nuns—both young and beautiful—are working in the church library putting away books. After working feverishly to get the job done, the first nun turns to the second and says, “I can’t take this heat anymore! Do you think it would be OK if we removed our shirts to cool off while we worked?” The second nun, feeling the heat herself, decides that it would be OK. She locks the door and closes the curtains. The two nuns take off their shirts and keep working. Suddenly, there is a knock on the door. “Who is it?” asks the first nun. “It’s the blind man,” says the voice behind the door. “Well, a blind man can’t see our nakedness. We can let him in,” the other nun says. They open the door. “Wow,” says the blind man, “nice ****! I gotta run back to the truck. Where do you want me to set these blinds?”

2006-06-10 08:13:52 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

Give me food, and I will live; give me water, and I will die. What am I?

2006-06-10 07:34:58 · 37 answers · asked by Stewie Griffin 4

You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?

2006-06-10 07:33:13 · 15 answers · asked by Stewie Griffin 4

i would buy clothes shoes video games other electronic things makeup but mostly electronic stuff how bout you

2006-06-10 07:28:38 · 9 answers · asked by broken flame 3

Ya know, like Spandex Man or Electro-hooker.

2006-06-10 07:06:52 · 10 answers · asked by opjames 4

2006-06-10 07:02:16 · 20 answers · asked by A man of constant sorrow 1

2006-06-10 06:58:47 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-10 06:51:48 · 26 answers · asked by Felicia Fox 6

...do they automatically lose because they can't find themselves?

2006-06-10 06:45:04 · 20 answers · asked by Felicia Fox 6

...if you got on a bus and a person sat down next to you and they smelled like Frito's ? What would you do ?

2006-06-10 06:43:07 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-10 06:19:20 · 21 answers · asked by thebewast 2

in Jimbo's pants

2006-06-10 06:13:50 · 8 answers · asked by Laura 4

A car is fitted with 4 tyres and 2 extra tyres inside. What is the distance travelled by each tyre if each tyre (all 6 tyres) travelled equal distances. The total distance travelled by the car is 300 km?

2006-06-10 06:11:40 · 17 answers · asked by Shanu A 1

ever heard

2006-06-10 05:49:11 · 8 answers · asked by rbuunyr 1

Do you set the table for 4 or 6?

2006-06-10 05:46:42 · 13 answers · asked by Laura 4

2006-06-10 05:36:21 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-10 05:35:45 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

Are they always hitting on you?

(Inspired by the melancholy underground)

2006-06-10 05:34:43 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous