> I think a letter similar to this was around before. However, I got a few
laughs from the one below!
> So the story goes:
> My wife received this letter from Walmart! (I was
> only having fun while waiting for my wife to shop.)
> Dear Mrs. Rightmyer,
> Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Gene
> Rightmyer, has been causing quite a commotion in our
> store. We cannot tolerate this type of behavior and
> have considered banning the entire family from
> shopping in any of our stores. We have documented
> all incidents on our video surveillance equipment.
> Three of our clerks are attending counselling from the
> trouble your husband has caused. All complaints
> against Mr. Rightmyer have been compiled and are listed
> below. Please discuss this situation with your husband.
> Although we appreciate your business, should there be
> further incidents, we shall take further action.
> Wal-Mart Complaint Department MEMO
> Re: Mr. Gene Rightmyer - Complaints:
> 15 Things Mr. Gene Rightmyer has done while his spouse
> was shopping:
> 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put
> them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
> 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to
> go off at 5-minute intervals.
> 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor
> leading to the restrooms.
> 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in
> an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and
> watched what happened.
> 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put
> a bag of M&M's on layaway.
> 6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to
> a carpeted area.
> 7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping
> department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in
> if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
> 8. September 23: When ever a clerk asks if they can help
> him, he begins to cry and asks, "Why can't you people
> just leave me alone?"
> 9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera;
> used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
> 10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting
> department, asked the clerk if he knows where the
> anti-depressants are.
> 11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously
> loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
> 12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his
> "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
> 13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when
> people were browsing through, yelled "PICK ME!",
> "PICK ME!"
> 14. December 21: When an announcement came over the
> loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and
> screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
> 15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the
> door and waited a while; then, yelled, very loudly,
> "There is no toilet paper in here!"
2006-11-16
17:00:03
·
12 answers
·
asked by
jloren
2
in
Jokes & Riddles