Senior Citizens

I have a simple machine and would like to learn.

2007-12-18 14:10:53 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

The first says: "Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, there's a better one. At MacDougal's, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will buy your third drink!"
The second then starts: "That sounds like a nice bar, but where I come from, there's a better one called Vinny's. At Vinny's, you buy a drink, Vinny buys you a drink. You buy another drink, Vinny buys you another drink."
Then the third pipes up. "You think that's good? Where I come from, there's this place called Murphy's. At Murphy's, they buy you your first drink, they buy you your second drink, they buy you your third drink, and then, they take you in the back and get you laid!"
"Wow!" say the other two. "That sounds fantastic! Did that actually happen to you?" "No," replies their friend, "but it happened to my sister

2007-12-18 14:02:35 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

I don't always but some years I do. Just wondering if anyone else does this.

2007-12-18 13:51:17 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous

Would it make you cranky? Or would you be just as happy?

2007-12-18 13:45:19 · 76 answers · asked by Sugar 7

A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. The golfer says to himself, "I'd give anything to sink this next putt."

A stranger walks up to him and whispers, "Would you give up a fourth of your sex life?"

The golfer thinks the man is crazy and that his answer will be meaningless. At the same time he thinks this might be a good omen, so he says, "Okay," and sinks the putt. Two holes later he mumbles to himself, "Boy, if I could only get an eagle on this hole."

The same stranger moves to his side and says, "Would it be worth another fourth of your sex life?"

The golfer shrugs and says, "Sure." He makes an eagle. On the final hole, the golfer needs yet another eagle to win. Though he says nothing, the stranger moves to his side and says, "Would you be willing to give up the rest of your sex life to win this match?"

The golfer says, "Certainly!" He makes the eagle.

As the golfer walks to the club house, the stranger walks alongside and says, "You know, I've really not been fair with you because you don't know who I am. I'm the devil, and from now on you will have no sex life."

"Nice to meet you," says the golfer. "My name's...
Father O'Malley!"

2007-12-18 13:39:01 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-12-18 13:37:47 · 9 answers · asked by Ju ju 6

The older I become the more comfortable I have to dress...stylish, but comfortable..after all they say, all you have to do is feel sexy and you'll be sexy !
and for the young ones...at 50 and 60 we still are SEXY!

2007-12-18 13:31:24 · 24 answers · asked by jalady 6

I love his music but just heard his version of Jingle Bells. Awful! He should stick to mainstream in my opinion.

2007-12-18 13:27:46 · 12 answers · asked by Just Hazel 6

2007-12-18 13:14:27 · 14 answers · asked by gggggg 6

Happy?
Thought provoking
Shocking
Set up for sequel
Ambiguous?

Or name one I forgot?

2007-12-18 13:00:04 · 29 answers · asked by Wickwire 5

or do others play a role?

2007-12-18 12:54:16 · 24 answers · asked by Wickwire 5

Big spender?
Moderate?
Cheapskate?

2007-12-18 12:49:29 · 24 answers · asked by Wickwire 5

or painting?

2007-12-18 12:47:02 · 28 answers · asked by Wickwire 5

Other than Lou Gehrig?

2007-12-18 12:43:17 · 6 answers · asked by Wickwire 5

or make pop corn balls

2007-12-18 12:41:48 · 15 answers · asked by gggggg 6

2007-12-18 12:39:22 · 15 answers · asked by Wickwire 5

For no apparent reason.

2007-12-18 12:26:02 · 15 answers · asked by Star doodle 2

2007-12-18 11:56:40 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-12-18 11:54:01 · 26 answers · asked by ⓑⓐⓨⓢⓐ ™ 6

mine is ironing

2007-12-18 11:50:34 · 32 answers · asked by ⓑⓐⓨⓢⓐ ™ 6

with our prez that our economy is OK.

My fixed income hasn't changed appreciably in the past 5 years yet many essential items like groceries and gasoline have almost doubled in price. Is GWB living in the real world?

2007-12-18 11:50:18 · 16 answers · asked by Just Hazel 6

...returning home from the beach each morning to rake up the
leaves in back and miscellaneous road trash in front yard.

2007-12-18 11:21:36 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

rooted a pineapple top? I bought a nice fresh pineapple at market yesterday and was trimming it this AM when I remembered that I had once rooted a top and it grew into an interesting plant but it a long time ago and I've forgotten how I did it. Do I put it in water or soil? And yes, I know it sounds like I'm rapidly approaching terminal boredom and that may just be true. My computer is filing abuse charges against me. It claims to be overworked and grossly underpaid.

2007-12-18 10:50:56 · 13 answers · asked by Just Hazel 6

I am waiting for our married daughter to tell us we are going to be grandparents someday(soon I hope)!

2007-12-18 10:35:07 · 24 answers · asked by PBcruzr 4

This one made me laugh

Legless Budgies For Sale.

No perches necessary

2007-12-18 09:47:10 · 23 answers · asked by ? 5

Neighbor? Friend? Family? UPS? Mailman? Or...That
' Special Someone'?

2007-12-18 09:35:46 · 40 answers · asked by Eve 5

..........What if" ( what if this had happened or that had happened instead of........?)

2007-12-18 09:25:29 · 27 answers · asked by Eve 5

......to someone who is no longer in your life that you wished you had said before, (good or bad), what would it be? To whom?

2007-12-18 09:20:43 · 29 answers · asked by Eve 5

2007-12-18 09:20:36 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-12-18 09:04:00 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous