Is it wrong to pray that bears maul my seventh grade orthodontist? Here’s why I ask. The first thing Elisha does as a prophet is heal some water. The second thing? Bear attack.
Check out 2 Kings 2:
23 As he was walking, some youths came out and jeered at him. “Go on up, you baldhead!” they said.” 24 He turned around and called down a curse in the name of the LORD. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.
Can you imagine if God still operated that way? Man, I would abuse that. I can see myself getting frustrated by a teenager on his cellphone in the middle of a movie. Without asking him to be quiet, I’d mutter under my breath, “God, bears please.”
How many bears would I launch during my commute? Cut me off, here’s a bear. Rode up the breakdown lane, how about a bear? Gave me the finger? Three bears.
I would be bearing people all day. Which is why God won’t give me access to them. He knows I’m a jerk and would abuse the blessing of attack bears.
2007-09-19
03:24:29
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12 answers
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asked by
longtuesday
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