for the last 4 years, i've been so conflicted about whether to contact my dad. i was the last one in the family to still be in touch with him. everyone else given up, but i felt he would be more of a jerk if no one tried to deal with him. i thought he'd appreciate my faith in him, despite all the wrong things he's done to us all over the years (he was abusive and neglectful... but he also was so stoned on pot that he really thought it was everyone else that was wrong; pretty much paranoid, narcassitic, and a con-man).
i never expected magic from him, just kindness to his daughter. but finally i realized that if it were in his interest, he'd rip me off too, and that while i was a kid, he was never really there for me (in addition to the hitting and emotional abuse). i wrote him to not contact me until he felt like trying to be good to me.
now i have bad relationships with men, look to others to fill his role, and am worried he may die before i can be ready to contact him again.
2007-10-22
18:13:51
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8 answers
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asked by
calm cool collected
2
in
Family