Here’s the short background: 9 mos ago my husband attacked me in front of our little girl – he just went nuts and came at me, shoved me into her (she’s 3) and was swinging. I ducked several times and he didn’t actually hit me, though standing behind me and seeing it, she thinks he did. I was obviously very upset, crying and trying to leave. He held the door, I had to beg and struggled to open the door, he held it, but finally let me out. She screamed all the way to the Sheriff’s office for Daddy not to hurt Mommy. I left and haven’t been back. He wouldn’t go to counseling, so I filed for divorce. I only see him in very public places like the mall.
I DO NOT SPEAK BADLY OF HER FATHER TO / AROUND HER. NOR DO I TALK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED THAT DAY UNLESS SHE BRINGS IT UP.
Tonight, she was angry with me and tried to hit me. I, as usual, put her in time-out.. when it was time to get out, I told her it is not okay to hit, we use our words and told her she should say she is sorry. She said, Well, Daddy hit you and you cried so bad. (Remember – this happened 9 months ago!) I sat down and put her on my lap and said, what daddy did that day was a wrong choice - I know, he shouldn’t have tried to hurt mommy, she said, are you going to live somewhere else? I said what do you mean? She said, when daddy hurt you we don’t live in the red house anymore, mommy I don’t want you to go …. And then I was at a total loss.. I don’t know what to say… How do I explain to her why I couldn’t stay with Daddy and his refusal for counseling? Or explain to her what happened that awful day without saying bad things about her dad? Or lie and say that Daddy won’t hurt Mommy – because to be honest, I don’t know if he’ll try again or not… What do I say?
2007-06-23
18:03:00
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32 answers
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asked by
Wildflower
6
in
Marriage & Divorce