Adoption

My daughter is from a step-parent adoption. She doesn't know her biological dad. I have kept all her court documents and original birth certificate for her and I am thinking about putting it all together into a scrap book to give her when she's a teenager and starts asking more questions. She knows now that she was adopted, but she's too young to really understand too much about it.

I was wondering if this was a good idea, in your opinion, and what else I can do to help it be easier for her as she grows up?

2007-10-18 13:07:51 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

im looking for an online adoption support group for the family members that gave the bay up for adoption


if you have any references please tell me or any sites that offer where to get support for the adoption healing process

thanks so much

-alison

2007-10-18 07:06:41 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

Why can't adoptive parents be secure enough in the relationship they have with their child and allow them to know the whole truth about the beginning of their life. Their roots. Their heritage.

2007-10-17 23:44:55 · 20 answers · asked by H****** 7

I know of several couples who have adopted children -- not infants -- from overseas, such as Guatamala, Russia and Liberia. I know it's very difficult to adopt an American infant, and I'm wondering what keeps American couples from adopting American children out of foster care or from an agency?

2007-10-17 16:05:11 · 23 answers · asked by No Shortage 7

Ok, so I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now. We have a child together but not married, we haven't had the best relationship. Any who, my whole life I have wanted to adopt at least one child. But just last night I found out that he's completely against adoption (yeah, I know). This is something I've wanted my WHOLE entire life, and now I can't because he doesn't like the idea??!! Do you think this is something to break up over? What would you do?

2007-10-17 12:04:10 · 25 answers · asked by kytta22 1

my husband and i adopted a sibling group of 4. ages 11, 5, 6, 20mo. everything was going fine until recently. all my children calls us mom and dad except,you got it, my 11 yr. old girl. and recently she has been very disrespectful to us. exspecially me. i don't require my kids to call me mom. but i do reqire them to respect us. my 11 yr. old thinks she can do what ever she wants and should suffer no consequences. she is very mouthy. and although she is almost a straight A student i hesitate to reward her for that because she is so ungrateful for anything we do for her. nothing is ever good enough for her. i love all of my kids very much. but i am almost to my limit with her atitude. and you would think someone coming from the situations she did would be more grateful. and actually at one time she was and now she is not. is this a normal age thing or is this something else. please help me what should i do. and how can i help her to understand that we are only trying to be her parents.

2007-10-17 09:02:27 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous

Is it wrong for me to want to discontinue a relationship with her? She is 27 and her life is mess. There are way to many details to mention, but she makes me feel selfish for not wanting to spend every waking minute with her and help her work out all her problems. She expects that now that she knows me as a sister I should always accommodate her. Because "we are blood" But I don't feel the connection with her that I thought I would when I decided to finally meet her. I don't want to be in her life. I have tried my best. I have done so much for her in the short time that I have known her and I feel this is a one way relationship. Just because an adoptee meets their biological relative, is wrong to say "I can't handle this" and decide to cut ties?

2007-10-17 07:16:12 · 13 answers · asked by Jean 3

I would really love to hear more positive adoption stories, and yes, I know they are out there!!! I know many people who are adopted and are happy!! For those of you who are adoptees and have had a bad experience, I am curious to know what about your adoptive family hurt you so much. I have a 3 1/2 month old adopted daughter and I want to do what I can to avoid her feeling the same way when she is older.

2007-10-17 04:40:08 · 15 answers · asked by Amy B 3

Need information about the procedure and the time it takes

2007-10-17 02:27:24 · 33 answers · asked by mental_inside2002 1

I was adopted by a white family; my biological mother is American Indian. Recently, I've thought about digging up the adoption records in order to enroll in the tribe, to establish some genetic ancestral connection for myself and my kids. But I worry whether this is a selfish desire that would cause a burden on the tribe, or if increased enrollment benefits tribes. And, in general, how do tribal members view adopted-out people looking for connection? I mean, culturally, I'm all white; only my blood is half red.
Any comments, encouragement, suggestions?

2007-10-17 02:14:33 · 9 answers · asked by sagacity incarnate 2

my daughter just realised that shes adopted. i dont know how she knows about it. shes angry i hadnt told her. ihad actually decided to tell her when shes 12 years.. shes still 9 years... so i hadnt told her.. now she doesnt talk to us properly, tries to ignore us if we try to talk to her.. i want to talk to her... but she doesnt listen to me... i also have the fear that she may attempt a suicide that shes not living with her own parents... plzplz help........
im really tensed and worried about all this..................

2007-10-16 21:59:29 · 47 answers · asked by katie 2

I don't understand, most experiences in life, especially something as profound as adoption have gradations in them, some good, some bad...

But with adoption it seems that people are determined to pretend it is all good for the adoptee and adoptive parents. All babies want one thing, their mommy, when you have a baby and keep it all the education classes really drive this home, but somehow adopted out babies are different?

Someone on Y!A recently suggested that until they start having a "bad" adoption section only they would avoid the adoption section altogether. I don't understand.

Why can't people who have had difficulty with adoption speak out about it?

Why do people think they are speaking for all people? My best adoptee IRL friend is glad she was adopted, she grieved horribly as a child, I knew her then, and I don't remember grieving at all, she baffled me when she talked about it, but I certainly didn't put her down.

As I got older I saw how adoption

2007-10-16 20:42:35 · 10 answers · asked by Joy M 3

I've been on here for a few weeks, just watching, and I'm in shock.

I am a birthmother who has chosen to place my daughter (8 years ago) and she has a wonderful life with 2 parents who love her and can give her EVERYTHING I couldn't. Yeah I wanted her to have vacations, an education, a family,Her birthfather was a married co-worker who wanted me to get an abortion. He let me know from the begining that if it got out, it would ruin me. (trust me he had connections)

I made the choice myself. I wasn't some nieve little girl who was talked out of her baby. I have a great relationship with her family. She's does thing I dreamed of as a child and she SO HAPPY!!!


I'm thankful everyday that this was an option for us I would have never made it through my residency with a baby at home.
I Would have had $200,000 in student loans and no job.

I find it offensive that all these "advocates" speak for me.

Do any other birthmothers feel the same way

2007-10-16 15:34:18 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

Did you know that's it's illegal for an agency to allow a woman to chose parents for her child based on race?

Some law makers are even trying to make it illegal for PAPs to include their pics to prevent "discrimination"

However the adoptive couple can chose EVERY feature they desire and are willing to accept down to a distant history of mental health or height of b-parents, if she smoked, what kind of delivery she chose.

How do you feel about this?

2007-10-16 14:13:27 · 14 answers · asked by in COGNITO * 4

but its hard for me to remember her mothers name please help me in this matter we did it because it was best at the tim

2007-10-16 10:01:42 · 15 answers · asked by wordologist 2

I believe that God has a plan for EVERY child.

Our son was exposed to horrible thing while in utero and by the grace of God his b-mom and I were brought together just before she was would have made a decision that she would regret FOREVER. Like she thought, he was born with many problems and God provided her with a couple equiped to care for his needs and then some.

She has learned from her mistake and has gone on to parent her next child who was born healthy.

I feel so blessed that God (not me) gave him a chance at life and I get to be a part of that

Does anyone else feel SOOOOOO BLESSED?

2007-10-15 15:11:38 · 13 answers · asked by in COGNITO * 4

If you are 22 or 23 and have been married for 2 or 3 years, can you adopt a baby domestically?

2007-10-15 13:03:04 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

adoption knowing their birth parents

2007-10-15 08:45:49 · 22 answers · asked by syed h 1

2007-10-14 12:34:40 · 10 answers · asked by helena71 1

My children were adopted internationally and are a different race then my husband and me. People often come up to us, and ask questions about our children while they're sitting right there. While some are totally innapropriate, others are just curious, but not things I think should really be shared with strangers or anyone really unless they chose to share it when they're older.
My question is, how should I respond when someone asks a personal question about their adoption. I definetly don't want to share informaton that belongs to my children, but I don't want to say "that's none of your bussiness!", and make my kids think the story of their birth and adoption is shameful, and not something they can ever discuss.
Adoptive parents, how do you handle this, and adoptees, how would you want this handled from a child's perspective? My sons are both too young to ask their opinions now, but the oldest will soon be able to understand what people are talking about.

2007-10-14 07:00:43 · 17 answers · asked by Angela R 4

answers on adoption,people are giving some really good answers and advice to people and then they get the thumbs down for it......why....is it because people dont understand about adoption.....if thats the case then they shouldnt be voting,what right do they have to make someone feel like they should keep there opinions to themselves when all there doing is trying to help or get there point across......

2007-10-13 13:45:47 · 22 answers · asked by bugwales 2

I feel like that information is personal to my child and I am not really comfortable telling others. Feel like it makes it easy for others to place judgement on the parents and therefore disrespects my child.
What do you think?
What would you politely say to people when they ask?

BTW, I am including my in-laws with this....they would tell the world if they knew.

(I have not adopted a child yet......I am preparing)

2007-10-13 11:51:21 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-13 11:39:34 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

I was curious let's say an affluent couple have a baby and they want to give it up for adoption and of course they want the best for their child-- and a single lady with a job wants to adopt the child, BUT, she also wants the biological father to pay child support even though it is not her own. Is this possible and have you ever heard of something like this before.

I am 42 and am looking to adopt. I can't afford the high fees to get a child, but I can afford to raise one if the father helps financially. YOur thoughts.

2007-10-13 08:11:25 · 17 answers · asked by DREENA 2

2007-10-13 06:10:42 · 13 answers · asked by profile not in use 2

Mine are nice.
I think my experiences were overall positive.
I still have issues with adoption and being adopted.

How about you?

2007-10-13 05:42:07 · 20 answers · asked by Isabel A 4

every body should know about their origin.. its part of human right.. do you think so?

2007-10-13 02:22:28 · 15 answers · asked by Sienna 2

We are hoping to adopt a little girl from infant to toddler. Lately, some family members have been really pressuring me not to ever tell our child that she is adopted. I have very mixed feelings about this. For those of you who are adopted, what do you think? Is there a right age to tell? Or do you think you would have been better off never knowing? I don't like deception so my gut instincts tell me that the child SHOULD know....but any and all answers are appreciated!!

2007-10-12 06:08:36 · 28 answers · asked by LoveMyKids! 3

2007-10-11 15:15:25 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

them. I think I need to rewrite the question though because I have talked to my son further, and now he says it's not that he wants to explore his birthmother's religion as much as it is that he feels like he doesn't belong in ours, and HE attributes that to having been adopted. With this in mind, he says he doesn't want to continue in religious education because it makes him feel like he doesn;t belong. I really don't like the idea of him just quitting his religious education, not until he's at least 13. I also have a daughter who was adopted who would like nothing better than to quit just because she doesn't "like" it. I can't let him quit and insist that she continue; I just wouldn't ahve a leg to stand on even if his "reason" is more mature than hers. She is also 11. Any new or additional thoughts are welcome! (we're talking 2 hours each week here of very "liberal" religious education -- pretty mild on the indoctrination scale and not at all demanding in a religous way)

2007-10-11 14:11:57 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous