All categories - 23 May 2007

2007-05-23 10:33:01 · 14 answers · asked by WWTSD? 5 in Religion & Spirituality

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench

talking........and one blonde says to the other:

"Which do you think is farther away.......... Florida

or the moon?

"The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo,

can you see Florida .......?????



.----------------------------------------------------------------.

CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station.

She tells the mechanic it died.

After he works on it for a few minutes,

it is idling smoothly. She says,"What's the story?"

He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"

She asks,"How often do I have to do that?"



.-----------------------------------------------------------------

SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks

her very nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get

your act together.

Just yesterday you take away my license and then

today you expect me to show it to you!"



.------------------------------------------------------------------.

RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk.

She comes to a river and sees another

blonde on the opposite bank.

"Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,

"How can I get to the other side?

" The second blonde looks up the river then down the

river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."



.---------------------------------------------------------------------.

KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the

freeway.Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the

blonde behind the wheel was knitting!

Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren,

the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn

and yelled , "PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------.

BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.

The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"

The American said, "We were the first on the moon!

" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on

the sun!"

The Russian and the American looked at each other and

shook their heads.

"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!"

said the Russian.

To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know.

We're going at night!"

.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.

It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on

Science &Nature.

Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone

calls your name, can you hear it?"

She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------.

FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs,

and asked her what their names were.

The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex

and one was named Timex.

Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs

like that?"

"HelOOOooo," answered the blond.-"They're watch dogs!"

2007-05-23 10:32:58 · 9 answers · asked by crharris01 2 in Jokes & Riddles

I need help finding all the factors of the number 333. please help and QUICKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!

2007-05-23 10:32:55 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Mathematics

why are you not living for today?

2007-05-23 10:32:53 · 10 answers · asked by Trish 5 in Polls & Surveys

What if they had Peyton, LT, Hutchinson, Urlacher, and Champ, could they win?

2007-05-23 10:32:48 · 21 answers · asked by BBQ & Beer 3 in Football (American)

I have been taking paxil for less than a month but taking it everyday 10m I want to stop taking it. Can I do this abrumptly since I havent been taking it for long?

2007-05-23 10:32:42 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Mental Health

I was a big fan of this in the military, haven't had it as good since then.

2007-05-23 10:32:39 · 8 answers · asked by supercarpman_49 2 in Cooking & Recipes

2007-05-23 10:32:33 · 1 answers · asked by Scotty Doesnt Know 7 in Reality Television

I am getting married next year. I have alot of family members that im close to. How do I include them without hurting their feeelings?

2007-05-23 10:32:28 · 19 answers · asked by KIMBERLY J 1 in Weddings

There is some very important info for them at

http://evenbethel.tripod.com

2007-05-23 10:32:26 · 12 answers · asked by jwalert 1 in Religion & Spirituality

2007-05-23 10:32:25 · 5 answers · asked by Aaron Walker 1 in Skin Conditions

2007-05-23 10:32:23 · 13 answers · asked by yanswers 2 in Small Business

Some historians maintains that Wolrd War II was a continuation of World War I. Please list some arguments supporting this ideas.(fastest awnsers get the points<3)

2007-05-23 10:32:16 · 11 answers · asked by italianonikki 2 in History

First blonde guy joke


Three men, an Irish man, a Mexican man, and a blonde (yes they are legal but back to the joke) work together on a construction site. During lunch the Irish man opens his lunch and says, "Corn beef and cabbage again? I swear if I get corn beef and cabbage in my lunch again, I'm going to jump off this building!" The Mexican man opens his lunch and says, "Tacos and burritos again? I swear if I get tacos and burritos in my lunch again, I'm also going to jump off this building!" The blonde man opens his lunch and says, "Bologne and chips again? I swear if I get bologne and chips in my lunch again I too will jump off this building!" The next day during their lunch the Irish man opens his lunch and sure enough he has corn beef and cabbage. He jumps off the building. The Mexican man opens his lunch as he has tacos and burritos. He also jumps off the building. The blonde guy opens his lunch and he had bologne and chips. He jumps off the building as well. During the funeral, they had all three together, the wife of the Irish man said, "If I had known that he didn't want corn beef and cabbage, I would have asked him what he wanted." The wife of the Mexican man said, "If I had known that he didn't want tacos and burritos, I would have gotten out my cook book and tried something new." They each looked at the wife of the blonde man which she replied, "Don't look at me, he always fixes his lunch!"

2007-05-23 10:32:13 · 17 answers · asked by retrodragonfly 7 in Jokes & Riddles

Who has gotten them before? I just got one today. I want to shower. Can i? It's the stage where its already peeled and it's orange

2007-05-23 10:32:11 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Tattoos

Doing the math, that's 1 million people who have entered this country illegally having a criminal record. What kinds of crimes have they committed? Who knows, we'll never know.
And thanks to this new bill, that's 1 million more people added to a growing list of criminals in this country.

2007-05-23 10:31:56 · 12 answers · asked by Terry H 3 in Immigration

I am thinking of moving to Orlando to pursue a career in Real Estate. I know no one. I would probably work 2-3 nights a week as a bartender but I was wondering if people thought that a NEW real estate agent in a completly NEW city could make it. I know sales is a lot about who you know. Any other fields that I might should consider? THANKS!

2007-05-23 10:31:51 · 2 answers · asked by hopes2graduate 1 in Other - Careers & Employment

2007-05-23 10:31:43 · 3 answers · asked by abdo94 1 in Diet & Fitness

2007-05-23 10:31:35 · 2 answers · asked by Ryan H 1 in Other - Electronics

Shouldn't you be against artificial insemination, fetility drugs and viagra? These can lead to unwanted pregnancies - fertility drug takers ofter have high count multiple births. If abortion was illegal, all the women who could not get pregnant naturally would have a larger pool of adoptable babies.

2007-05-23 10:31:30 · 10 answers · asked by citizenjanecitizenjane2 4 in Politics

I thought we were getting along

2007-05-23 10:31:28 · 35 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

there's this guy that i really like. we've been having sex together. so anyways he's a big flirt and last night I asked him why does he flirt with other girls and he was like "I don't want a girlfriend right now" meaning that he doesn't want ME to be his girlfriend. why doesn't he just tell me so directly? why does he continue to call me even though i tell him not to? what is his problem and what should i do? i don't want to be used by him anymore so how do i get rid of him??????? is he playing with me???? or did he really mean it when he said he doesn't want a girlfriend right now?

2007-05-23 10:31:27 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

i dont get it i kno their lives are hard...y would they want MORE pain??? i siply think its HORRIBLE..and if u do it get some help...explain it to me ppl!

2007-05-23 10:31:26 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Mental Health

There's this girl in my class, yesterday she wore a blue top. Today it was red, last week I overheard her say that she was writing an essay on the restructuring of post soviet Russia and was looking for a book that could help. I know where there is a book store. This girl also has a lunch box and I have heard a pair of boots, but I am unable to confirm that. does she like me?

2007-05-23 10:31:21 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

My boyfriends mother won't come to our wedding stating she can't afford to so she said and also she wants my bf to come say he is sorry for yelling at her she had continually lied to me about his life and he confronted her now she and his two brothers (groomsmen) won't come I don't know what to do I just went over there to get our lawnmower and she told me wedding haha he told me there wasn't going to be one I didn't say anything another ? HOW DO I GET HER TO STOP LYING?

2007-05-23 10:31:18 · 13 answers · asked by melissa s 1 in Weddings

2007-05-23 10:31:02 · 5 answers · asked by halle 2 in Mathematics

It almost looks like the detergent is not washing away completely. I use Cascade powder and I use that Jet Dry rinse aid stuff. Is there some way to remedy this?

2007-05-23 10:30:50 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Cleaning & Laundry

2007-05-23 10:30:34 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Renting & Real Estate

2007-05-23 10:30:26 · 6 answers · asked by reifguy 6 in Polls & Surveys