Subject: Tech Support
*This ought to make you feel better about your computer skills! If you
skip
any, you have to read the last one! Unbelievable, but supposedly all
true!!!!* =================================*
Tech support:* What kind of computer do you have?*
Female customer:* A white one...
===============*
**Customer:* Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.*
Tech support:* Have you tried pushing the Button?*
Customer:* Yes, sure, it's really stuck.*
Tech support:* That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.*
Customer:* No, wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still
on my
desk... sorry....
===============
*Tech support:* Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the
screen.*
Customer:* Your left or my left?
===============
*Tech support:* Good day. How may I help you?*
Male customer:* Hello... I can't print.*
Tech support:* Would you click on "start" for me and...*
Customer:* Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not
Bill
Gates.
===============
*Customer:* Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every
time I
try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and
placed
it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find
it...
===============
*Customer:* I have problems printing in red...*
Tech support:* Do you have a color printer?*
Customer:* Aaaah....................thank you.
===============
*Tech support:* What's on your monitor now, ma'am?*
Customer:* A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.
===============
*Customer:* My keyboard is not working anymore.*
Tech support:* Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?*
Customer:* No. I can't get behind the computer.*
Tech support:* Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back*
Customer:* OK*
Tech support:* Did the keyboard come with you?
*Customer:* Yes*
Tech support:* That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there
another
keyboard?*
Customer:* Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work...
===============
*Tech support:* Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple, a
capital
letter V as in Victor, the number 7.*
Customer:* Is that 7 in capital letters?
===============
*Customer:* I can't get on the Internet.*
Tech support:* Are you sure you used the right password?*
Customer:* Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.*
Tech support:* Can you tell me what the password was?*
Customer:* Five stars.
===============
*Tech support:* What anti-virus program do you use?*
Customer:* Netscape.*
Tech support:* That's not an anti-virus program.*
Customer:* Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
===============
*Customer:* I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver
on my
computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
===============
*Tech support:* How may I help you?*
Customer:* I'm writing my first e-mail.*
Tech support:* OK, and what seems to be the problem?*
Customer:* Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get
the
circle around it?
===============
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her
printer.
*
Tech support:* Are you running it under windows?*
Customer:* "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point.
The
man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his
printer is
working fine."
===============
And last but not least...*
**
Tech support:* "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at
the
same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now
type
the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager"*
Customer:* I don't have a P.*
Tech support:* On your keyboard, Bob.*
Customer:* What do you mean?*
Tech support:* "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.*
Customer:* I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!
2006-09-07
09:16:56
·
18 answers
·
asked by
Anonymous
in
Jokes & Riddles