A man decided to leave work early and go drinking. He stayed at the bar until
it closed and by then, he was very drunk. When he got home, he didn't want to
wake up his wife, so he removed his shoes and started to tiptoe up the stairs.
Halfway up the stairs, he fell backwards and landed flat on his butt. That
wouldn't have been so bad, but he had a couple of empty bottles in his back
pocket which broke and carved up his buttocks pretty badly. He was so drunk
though, that he didn't even realize he was hurt.
He made it up the stairs and into the bathroom, where he began to undress.
Suddenly noticing some blood, he checked himself out in the mirror. Sure enough,
he saw that his behind was cut up something awful. He repaired the damage as
best he could, under the circumstances, and went to bed.
When he woke up in the morning, his head was hurting, his backside was
hurting, and he was cowering under the covers, trying to think up a good story.
Just then, his wife entered the room and said, "Well, it looks like you
really tied one on last night. Where were you?"
"I worked late, dear," he replied, meekly, "and went out for a couple of
beer."
"A couple of beer? That's a good one," she snapped. "You got plastered! Where
did you go?"
"What makes you so sure I got drunk last night, anyway?" he asked.
"Well," she replied, "my first clue was when I got up this morning and saw all
the band-aids stuck to the mirror....."
2006-08-19
00:49:50
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7 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Jokes & Riddles