Senior Citizens

The story goes.....this old man had been feeling really sick and weak. His wife took him to their doctor. The doctor called him back to the exam room and asked him what was wrong. The man went on to describe his symptoms as the doc examined him. After his exam the doctor told the old gent what he needed to do to recover. He said; " you must have your wife take care of you and treat you well. She must bring your slippers, fix your favorite meals and bring them to you, let you watch your favorite television shows massage your feet etc. Otherwise my sad conclusion is that you are going to die.." The old gentleman went back out to the waiting room and the doc had his wife come in to discuss what she needed to do. He told her she must wait on her husband hand and foot and treat him like a King or he was going to die. He finished telling her, and she went back out to her husband. Her husband said;" what did the doc say?" She said; "he said you're going to die!!!"

2007-11-07 02:53:47 · 16 answers · asked by Eve 5

My wife and I live in South Florida. We are both 55 Florida is a "world" where everyone sells their houses every few years, constantly moves from job to job, state to state, and all are 'living' for one goal; retire as soon as possible! We are the opposite; 20+ years at our jobs. My wife would like to semi-retire at 67, then work part-time. I want to work until 85 (50 years on my job at that time!), and we are still living in the same house for 25 years. Instead of moving all over, like everyone else, we rent a house, for two weeks, in a different part of the country, every year.

With so many people around us constantly 'selling and moving,' (all our neighbors have changed every few years), we sometimes think that we are not doing the right thing by "staying put!"

I think we are on the "right track" with this. What do the rest of you think?

PS We would like to have a summer home. My wife and I are considering Maryville, Tennessee. Anyone know the area?

2007-11-07 02:43:13 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

Resimay



Deer Sir,

I waunt to apply for the reporter job what I saw in the paper. I can Type real quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting. I think I am good on the phone and no I am a pepole person, Pepole really seam to respond to me well. Certain men and all the ladies. Im lookin for a Jobb as a reporter but it musent be to complicaited. I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety. My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth, I can start imeditely.



Thank you in advanse fore yore anser. hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.

Sinseerly,

BRYAN nikname Beefy

PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of me.
.



( Picture of handsome muscular man)



Employer's response:.....

Dear Beefy-I mean Bryan ,

It's OK honey, we've got spell check. You're hired. .

2007-11-07 02:10:11 · 14 answers · asked by Cheryl 6

but will NEVER taste again if you have the choice?

2007-11-07 01:50:22 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

and an IRS agent was sitting by your bed, what would you say to them?

2007-11-07 01:48:58 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

realized that it was for the best, later?

2007-11-07 01:45:21 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

the holidays come sooner and sooner every year. remember when you were young and the official christmas season started the day after thanksgiving? when people put up decorations and stores magically transformed overnight? is it just me or, was it just more special then? with everyone trying to get such a huge head start these days, it's just not the same anymore.

2007-11-07 01:42:19 · 16 answers · asked by racer 51 7

Is there anyone in your family or friends, who you love, but just cannot trust?
TIA!

2007-11-06 22:32:08 · 17 answers · asked by kayboff 7

This a scary thought. It never hurts to be in the know, right? TIA!

Here's a link for anyone interested:
http://www.privacyrights.org/fs/fs17a.htm

2007-11-06 21:03:07 · 14 answers · asked by kayboff 7

I'm a young? woman almost 30 and I'm facing a problem I'm single and have really always been, at times i feel lonely but only for a time now here's my dilemma, my family is traditional and want me to settle down and marry, i on the other hand feel fine as i am, kind of,so why should i pursue a relationship? but the older ones say i will be lonely as i age i trust them to be wiser so i end up confused? I'm also always experiencing things later than others so some of my family my own age say that i will definitely want a husband later but should act now as this is the best age to find one, now this is very believable when i look around but i still don't think it would be easy to find one as i don't get asked out now.i want to know your age and what you think especially if you are a older single woman, how is your life do you have regrets,what would you change what are the benefits of being single in old age or if you married at late age for the first time was it harder was it worth it?

2007-11-06 19:20:35 · 30 answers · asked by hi people 3

How do you get back to sleep?

2007-11-06 18:02:53 · 25 answers · asked by ncgirl 6

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.
-- Will Rogers
(=^.^=)
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.
-- Winston Churchill
(=^.^=)
Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
-- Phyllis Diller
(=^.^=)
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.
-- Billy Crystal

2007-11-06 17:28:59 · 27 answers · asked by felines 5

On a recent trip to Texas my truck started bogging down, I couldn't get any speed and everytime I attempted to climb a hill the max speed I could get was like 30 miles an hour.
I finally pulled into a auto parts store and asked them to put the diagnostics machine on. They gave me several very expensive diagnosis. Having recently done a little work on the truck, their diagnostics didn't sound true.
I called my Brother who owns a trucking company in Houston. After explaining what was going on, he agreed with me.
He informed me that there was alot of bad gas out there, he felt like it was the fuel filter.
Now this fuel filter is under the truck, right under the drivers seat. It is an inline filter and cost a whopping $7.50. There is also a little package of clamps that the parts house sells for another $7.00, you have to clamp these little pac man type clamps on the nipples of the inline filter, to get the old on off.
(more to come)

2007-11-06 16:52:18 · 13 answers · asked by Cheryl 6

My husband and I were asleep and our dog was sleeping in the living room. Our small town was being robbed on and off for about a month. What they would do is cruise the neighborhood looking for bicycles. They stole the bicycles for the heist. In the middle of the night they rode up, came in through the side garage door and took things from the garage and hid them in the bushes between the houses. We were lucky, sometimes they filled the family car with stuff and stole the car, too! Through the garage they came into the kitchen. My purse was on the table and my husbands wallet was on the counter. When they started to walk into the living room, the dog woke up and scared them off. We found my purse after we went to the DMV and canceled all the credit cards. It turned out to be a big gang of identity crooks with a notebook full of information. I was in there, too, Now we double check all the doorlocks every night and our dog is always ready for the bad guys!

2007-11-06 16:31:55 · 29 answers · asked by Granny 6

with Jane Fonda and Henry Fonda and of course Katherine Hepburn.......I loved the movie and these are some wonderful actors/actresses...........

2007-11-06 16:09:28 · 34 answers · asked by Melissa R 4

I just found out. She had a boy and a girl...early. She's 47 ! So ...Whadda ya think of that????!!! My mother was 41 when she had me. How old was your mother when she had you?

2007-11-06 15:59:50 · 20 answers · asked by Deenie 6

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several
months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, he
motioned for her to come nearer.

She sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times.

When I got fired, you were there to support me.

When my business failed, you were there.

When I got shot, you were by my side.

When we lost the house, you stayed right here.

When my health started failing, you were still by my side...You know what?"

"What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with
warmth.

"I think your bad luck, get the hell away from me"

2007-11-06 15:48:24 · 11 answers · asked by Cheryl 6

I love my sweetie.

2007-11-06 15:32:06 · 28 answers · asked by snow ball 3

seniors or uk seniors I would like to know.

2007-11-06 15:12:56 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know.I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it.

A man answered, saying "Hello."I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?"Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right f***ing number!" and the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude .

When I tracked down Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're an asshole!" and hung up.

I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole' calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi,this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?"He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!" and hung up.

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking Spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his back window, so I wrote down his number. A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had is number on speed dial,) I thought that I'd better call the BMW asshole, too.

I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"He said, "Yes, it is." I asked, "Can you tell me where I can see it?" He said, "Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax. It's a yellow ranch, and the car's parked right out in front."

I asked, "What's your name?" He said, "My name is Don Hansen," I asked, "When's a good time to catch you, Don?" He said, "I'm home every evening after five."

I said, "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"

He said, "Yes?"

I said, "Don, you're an asshole!"

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.

Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.

Then I came up with an idea. I called asshole #1. He said, "Hello." I said, "You're an asshole!" (But I didn't hang up.) He asked, "Are you still there?" I said, "Yeah," He screamed, "Stop calling me," I said, "Make me," He asked, "Who are you?" I said, "My name is Don Hansen." He said, "Yeah? Where do you live?" I said, "Asshole, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, a yellow ranch, I have a black Beamer parked in front." He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers." I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole," and hung up.

Then I called Asshole #2. He said, "Hello?" I said, "Hello, asshole," He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..." I said, "You'll what?" He exclaimed, "I'll kick your ***," I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover.

Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd. In Fairfax.

I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax. I got there just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew.

NOW I feel much better. Anger management really does work.

2007-11-06 14:16:29 · 22 answers · asked by Cheryl 6

for a child yo call his/her parents by their first name..i have children ranging from 26 to 3..my youngest has started to call her dad and i by our first names...not all the time only when the mood takes.my mother who is 79 years young was shocked at this and said she will grow up with no respect lol.. when i was a child we all called our neighbours and my mams friends by mr/mrs whatever. we were never allowed to use their first names..i still call her friends by their full title..can anyone tell me the reason behind this..was it respect or just plain old fashioned x

2007-11-06 14:14:10 · 37 answers · asked by dollyk 6

I take, HRT and aThyroid pill, * vitamins. Is it time to really start reading labels properly?

2007-11-06 13:42:02 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

> >> A midget from Texas had testicles which hurt and ached almost all the time.
> >>
> >> The midget went to the doctor and told him about his problem.
> >>
> >> The doctor told him to drop his pants and he would have a look.
> >>
> >> The midget dropped his pants.
> >>
> >> The doctor stood him up onto the examining table, and started to examine him.
> >>
> >> The doctor put one finger under his left testicle and told the midget to turn his head and cough, the usual method to check for a hernia.
> >>
> >> "Aha!" mumbled the doctor, and as he put his finger under the right testicle, he asked the midget to cough again.
> >>
> >> "Aha!" said the doctor once more, and reached for his surgical scissors.
> >>
> >> There was a snip-snip-snip-snip on the right side, and then
> >> snip-snip-snip-snip on the left side.
> >>
> >> The midget was so scared he was afraid to look, but noted with amazement that the snipping did not hurt.
> >>
> >> The doctor then told the midget to walk around the examining room to see if his testicles still hurt.
> >>
> >> The midget was absolutely delighted as he walked around and discovered his boys were no longer aching.
> >>
> >> The doctor said, "How does that feel now?" The midget replied, "Perfect doc, and I didn't even feel it.
> >>
> >> What did you do?"
> >>
> >> The doctor replied "I cut two inches off the top of your cowboy boots."

2007-11-06 13:34:35 · 12 answers · asked by Cheryl 6

> I'm sure those of you who aren't in the cattle business don't understand
> the issues here.
>
>
> But to those of us who who's living depends on the cattle market,
> selling
> cattle, raising the best beef possible... this is frustrating.
>
>
> As far as my family, we don't eat at McDonald's much (Subway is our
> choice
> of fast food), but this will keep us from ever stopping there again,
> even
> for a drink.
>
>
> The original message is from the Texas Cattle Feeders Association.
>
>
> American cattle producers are very passionate about this.
>
>
> McDonald's claims that there is not enough beef in the USA to support
> their restaurants. Well, we know that is not so. Our opinion is they are
> looking to save money at our expense. The sad thing of it is that the
> people of the USA are the ones who made McDonald

2007-11-06 13:20:03 · 9 answers · asked by Cheryl 6

David David, Edgar Edgars, Phillip Phillips? Got some others?

2007-11-06 13:15:59 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

The question:- What came first, the chicken or the egg? Does not logic tell us that all they needed was one chicken and one rooster, and then the egg was laid?

2007-11-06 13:01:43 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

I have, when my husband had a heart attack. The doctors told me the prognosis was not good. I was walking down the corridor when I came across an old man who assured me that he was going to be alright.
The thing is, we never spoke, not a word.
It was just understood, that was the way it was to be.
I just didn't quite grasp what was going on at the moment. When I stepped out of the hospital I snapped, turned around and tryed to find him.....I was almost gleeful..I knew what I had come across.
Shortly afterwards, I transferred him to the Heart Institute in Houston. The surgeons there were amazing, even though the bottom of his heart was dead and had to be cut away.
Today, he is so active, I can hardly keep up with him:~)
Have you ever seen a spirit or an angel?

2007-11-06 12:33:40 · 24 answers · asked by Cheryl 6

Some tips.
1)A lump of sugar with1 drop of Eucalyptus Oil, three times a day, fightes the infection.
2) Chest Rub and inhalations. Cinnimon 2 drops, Nutmeg 2 drops. Ginger 2 drops, Eucalyptus 10 drops, Benzoin 4 drops, add to 30 mils, vegies oil. Good as a chest rub and on a hankie, AND, put in your socks under your feet. Your feet absorb.
3)A little brandy, 1 drop of Eucapyptus oil, some ginger, fresh. Add some honey and lemon, and hot water. Drink as hot as possible and get under the your blanket. Used a lot in Switzerland for colds and flu.
Use only GOOD Aromatherapy Oils. Run by your Doctor first.
They don;t like alternative methods, usually. But it is always best.

These have never harmed me or my family.

2007-11-06 12:22:05 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

Letterman. We are having a serious senior moment here and wont be able to sleep tonite trying to figure out her name.

2007-11-06 12:12:49 · 13 answers · asked by Riverrat 5

The tires are sold under the brand name Westlake, Telluride, Compass and YKS. It is for light-truck tires made from 2002 to 2005.

2007-11-06 12:03:20 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous