?????help i need advice and to know what you would do in my shoes??????????read me click here!!!!!!!!!!!!!?

Question

I'm a young? woman almost 30 and I'm facing a problem I'm single and have really always been, at times i feel lonely but only for a time now here's my dilemma, my family is traditional and want me to settle down and marry, i on the other hand feel fine as i am, kind of,so why should i pursue a relationship? but the older ones say i will be lonely as i age i trust them to be wiser so i end up confused? I'm also always experiencing things later than others so some of my family my own age say that i will definitely want a husband later but should act now as this is the best age to find one, now this is very believable when i look around but i still don't think it would be easy to find one as i don't get asked out now.i want to know your age and what you think especially if you are a older single woman, how is your life do you have regrets,what would you change what are the benefits of being single in old age or if you married at late age for the first time was it harder was it worth it?

thank you all so much for your wisdom :) that being said are there any actual elderly people on y answers to be found ??? I'm talking 60's and up???

Answer 1

I am young, high school young.

Love is something that you can't choose, you can try searching but it is not easy to find that man so quickly. Do try however

:)
Good luck with ur future descisions with love.

Answer 2

I'm that magical number 60, going on 16!

I was married for three years and I had a child to raise by myself. He's 31 years old now. So, I guess I've had the best and worst of both worlds.

Here's the thing to remember: This is your life, do not let family dictate it. They've made their mistakes, too, and maybe some you don't know about, and they probably think you're better off not knowing about.

I've been single for many years and had many suiters. I've just always felt better and been happier as a single. To me, men are too high maintenance. It's hard enough taking care of my needs without having someone else to take care of. I will grant that there are those who will really go out of their way to help with your needs, but that's just not really enough, psychologically, to keep a marriage going. There's sooooo much more to it.

Love does conquer all, and I find it is much easier for me to keep the well filled, by being single.

By the way, I was 26 when I married, not exactly a youngster, it only goes to show that you can make errors in your life at any age.

Seniors have a great many options in their lives, and always something to do, keeping us interested in life.

You will know what's right for you when the time comes.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

I married at the age of 23 under familial pressure. It was a horrible marriage that ended a few years later while I was pregnant for the 3rd time. I raised my children by myself without assistance of any sort because I didn't want to confuse my preschoolers with a stranger coming into their lives. Their father was killed and the kids never really knew him or anyone else as a father. I have remained single since that time, had a professional career and retired a few years ago. Marriage is a serious commitment. Your family wants the best for you, but they don't have to live with the man you marry, you do. Don't do it if it isn't right. I'll by 71 before 2008. I'm not sorry for going it alone and sometimes I feel lonely but it is better than the alternative for me.

Answer 4

Don't let your family pressure you into a relationship.
I am over 50 and been married a few times, like Southern Comfort said, I ain't tellin!!
Apparently you haven't met the right person, because if you had, you would be married by now.
You will know when your heart skips a beat and you feel like you just can't live with out them.
You don't have to settle for anything or any one.
It is written in the stars, and so it shall be.
In the mean time, enjoy your life and don't worry about tomorrow, tomorrow will be here soon enough.
Then you can move on to washing someone else's dirty under wear, picking up after them, bearing children and so on and so forth.
Enjoy your life to the fullest.
There is no hitch on a hearst.
This is the dance and I hope you dance it to your fullest:~)

Answer 5

I'm 66 years old. My husband died 9 years ago and I certainly would not want another relationship now. I raised a family and taught and later became a mental health professional. That was good for me BUT if you want to stay single (at least for now) that is perfectly fine and nobody else's business. Don't make the mistake of marrying because your family wants you to. A single woman can have a fantastic life and I don't think loneliness is a valid reason to marry. The years I was married were the lonely ones. Now I'm happy as a pig in a mudhole.

Answer 6

O.k. I'm not quite 60 yet but in my fifties. I have grown children. One is 30 and married and my other is 25 and single. We don't say anything!! Its not our place. I always tell him don't be in a hurry because if it happens and you find someone great but if it doesn't great also!! Its whats best for YOU!! There is nothing wrong with being unmarried. Don't pick and settle for someone just because you think you should as you are getting older and your family thinks you should. get married. THEY DON'T COUNT!! Plenty of single, successful women out there. My friend is in her late 40's, never married {dated when she felt like it} and happy. Lonely? See your family, buy a dog. I'm lonely I go to the mall ,see a friend. Just tell them Thanks for your concern and advice but I'm happy with the way things are. If it happens it happens. By the way...Plenty of married women who are lonely. Sometimes marriage isn't the answer. You'll know. Don't rush. Tell the family to talk about something or someone else. If you are happy PLEASE AGAIN don't find and marry a guy to make other members of your family happy. You do that and you will have regrets. Are you happy with the way things are? Yes? Good. To heck with everyone else.

Answer 7

The biggest mistake that you can make in your entire life is to get married just to get married and that because someone else wants you to.

I have seen that sort of thing quite a few times in my 61 years and it never ends well.

If the right person comes along and you want to get married, then by all means, get married; but, always remember it is better to hold out for Mr. Right than to spend the rest of your life with Mr. Wrong which is what will happen if you get married to the wrong person. Believe me, even if you get divorced, in one way or another that person will be with you the rest of your life - especially if you have children together.

As we get older, we all have regrets. That is just a part of life. There is always some wishfulness about "the road not taken" but loneliness is not evitable if you do not marry. There are so many things out there to do and people to meet who you do not have to marry.

Right now I am a single older woman, and an Atheist, so I don't go to church, but I do volunteer work at this community center, teaching computers, helping with activities for both children and older people. I am far from lonely, in fact a bit of a social butterfly.

So what I am saying is get out there and live life. If you meet the right person, get married. If not - have fun!

Answer 8

I had three children by the time I was 26 years old. BUT I WASN"T MARRIED. I am now though!! To a wonderful man who loves my kids and they him!
I have to say that this is a personal decision that your family shouldn't get involved in.
Love doesn't fall from the sky all perfect and wonderful! It may seem that way in the VERY begining of a relationship, but you both have to work at it to make it last! And most people are talking about divorce before they even get to the alter! So don't rush a relationship because you feel you have to satisfy your traditional family. Keep life to your own pace, you have to live it after all!
When you find "the one" and you make out the invitations to your wedding, then you can gloat over how wonderful a choice you made by waiting! (of course you do this discretely!!)
Do what is comfortable TO YOU. Just have fun meeting people. WHo knows, Mr. Right-Now maybe Mr. Right after all!

Answer 9

I am 56, divorced with no children. Don't let your family pressure you into anything.When the right person comes along, there will be no stopping you. Trust me, I know. I have been married twice. I was 20 years old the first time I got married. The man I married had been previously married, so my parents tried to talk me out of that, but it didn't work. I listened to my heart.He died after 12 years of marriage, but I have no regrets. He taught me to ride a motorcycle. Live your life how you want and do what pleases you. If something else comes up along the way, you can always change your plans.

Answer 10

As many have already said, you must do what you think is best for you! You don't need a spouse to make you whole. I had a great aunt who never married. She passed away a few years ago at the age of 92 without any regrets. I also have two sisters who have never married and don't plan to either. It's YOUR choice. Good luck, you will find what is right for you when the time is right.

Answer 11

I'm a single 45 year old guy. All my life I rebelled against the wishes of my family. Sometimes for the right reasons and sometimes for the wrong reasons.

Ultimately the decisions I've made were my own. When I've fallen sometimes I had family and friends there to help me get back on my feet.

The events that taught me the most were the ones that I struggled through on my own.

I guess what I'm trying to tell you is that it's better to be alone for the right reasons than to be with or married to someone for the wrong reasons.

If you get really lonely consider adopting either a dog (as I did) or a cat or some other pet from your local Animal Shelter.

Trust me my dog Angelina has given me comfort when others would not. I've learned more from her than she has from me