SMART *** ANSWER #6
It was mealtime during a flight on American Airlines.
"Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
"What are my choices?" John asked.
"Yes or no," she replied.
SMART *** ANSWER #5
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his
trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat, she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your
stub."
SMART *** ANSWER #4
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she
couldn't find one big enou gh for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
SMART *** ANSWER #3
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled
down his window.
"I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a
ticket.
SMART *** ANSWER #2
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway.
A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead".
Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under
the bridge.
Cars are backed up for miles.
Finally, a police car comes up.
The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on
his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"
The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of
gas."
SMART *** ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006:
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.
"Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow.
I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or
a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!"
A smart-*** guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What
would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter
sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering.
When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student,
shakes her head and sweetly says,
"Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."
2007-10-04
02:04:45
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8 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Jokes & Riddles