All categories - 25 April 2007

"Warning"...Bad Virus!


If you receive an email entitled "Badtimes", delete it immediately!
Do not open it. Apparently, this one is pretty nasty.

It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also
delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer.

It demagnetizes the stripes on ALL of your credit cards.

It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play.

It will re-calibrate your refrigerator's coolness settings so all your ice cream melts and your milk curdles.

It will program your phone's autodial to call only your mother-in-law's number.
This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank.

It will drink all your beer.

It will leave dirty socks on the coffee table when you are expecting company.

Its radioactive emissions will cause your toe jam and bellybutton fuzz (be honest, you have some) to migrate behind your ears.

It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing their hotel rendezvous to your Visa card.

It will cause you to run with scissors and throw things in a way that is only fun until someone loses an eye.

It will give you Dutch Elm Disease and Tinea.

It will rewrite your backup files, changing all your active verbs to passive tense and incorporating undetectable misspellings, which grossly change the interpretations of key sentences.

If the "Badtimes" message is opened in a Windows95 environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub.

It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, but it will also refill your skim milk with whole milk.

It will replace all your luncheon meat with Spam.

It will molecularly rearrange your cologne or perfume, causing it to smell like dill pickles.

It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold.

It is also a rather interesting shade of mauve.

These are just a few signs of infection.

PLEASE FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!!
LIFE IS UNCERTAIN; EAT YOUR DESSERT FIRST!

2007-04-25 08:01:41 · 14 answers · asked by ? 3 in Jokes & Riddles

According to the US Constitution, Treason is when one plots to over throw the U.S. Government during a time of war. Last night Tom Morello on the Tavis Smiley Show advocated the overthrow of the American Government which he equated with Nazi Germany & said our president should be hung. Both acts are considered acts of treason under the U. S. Constitution during war times. This puts him in that same category as Al Quida & Hamas. According to the U.S. Constitution, Tom Morello should be killed for treason against America.

2007-04-25 08:00:45 · 3 answers · asked by Holy Pig 2 in Music

2007-04-25 08:00:44 · 16 answers · asked by Here kitty kitty 5 in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-25 08:00:44 · 30 answers · asked by April 5 in Polls & Surveys

I've been dating on and off for almost 3 years now and I just become more and more discouraged with each new person. I'm 31 years old and I'm looking for a life partner, not just a boyfriend. I have to be selective because I'm a divorcee and I can't repeat the same mistakes twice. Does anyone have any good solid dating advise? How do you know when you finally meet the "one"? :(

2007-04-25 08:00:42 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

not scientific

2007-04-25 08:00:41 · 11 answers · asked by whoknewneu 1 in Mythology & Folklore

2007-04-25 08:00:27 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Sociology

Whyt cant they answer questions logically without sinking so LOW?
Got this hate mail just now:

From: i_want_to_be_nice
Subject: Re: You couldnt answer the question as usual
Message: LOL-- You liberals are so funny.
You're just upset that I am a BLACK conservative that your party can't control.
That is quite racist of you to think that I have to be some kind of robot and conform.


Nothing of the sort. SHE is the racist for implying something so wrong. This does proove once again how racist right wingers really are.
And that they cannot argue a point without smearing.

Thanks anyway. This works for the moderate/liberal majority in the long run.

2007-04-25 08:00:26 · 5 answers · asked by Jim W 2 in Politics

When walking the fine line of Life, some will stumble upon the realization of the mind-splitting paradox of the physical and the spiritual world.

And, within this realization it is conveyed that what our mind perceives as real, is merely a reflection of our own inner-self; and, that which we perceive to be outside of ourselves is really inside of ourselves.

With this realization, the question lies...
What more is needed, but to change our own mind fully/conclusively, if the drama of the outer is merely the drama of the inner?

(Sorry if this doesn't seem worded well, but somethings are hard to put into physical words. Thanks for listening...)

2007-04-25 08:00:25 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Religion & Spirituality

What would you change to make this nation better for all Americans of all races and colors ?

2007-04-25 08:00:14 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Immigration

Since the wages of sin are death and everyone sins, then death is imminent for all. It's also said that the body is a temple that should be treated as such. If we sin and/or consume things that damage the body, is the behavior a slow suicide since the end result will be death? Presuming the answer to be "yes" then what is the difference between a deliberate act of suicide and the death that results from our normal sinful behavior? Sin is sin and death is death; I would argue that there is no difference.

2007-04-25 07:59:56 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Religion & Spirituality

i only need one more word and then im done...the word is flint...so far i have:
fil
fin
fit
lift
lin
lint
lit
nil
nit
til
tin.....can u help??? only one more word...what in the world is it???

2007-04-25 07:59:46 · 8 answers · asked by Jessie 3 in Words & Wordplay

i want braces but i'm in a financial bind right now between bills, rent, car note, food expenses and school, someone told me that i could go to TJ. and get the braces put on way cheaper than it would cost me to start out here, (CA.) it sounds like a good idea seeing as how i can always get my ortho treatment out here in CA ,

2007-04-25 07:59:22 · 8 answers · asked by sweetest_1_00 1 in Dental

I am 16 years old, I am 5'3" and 175 lbs. I need to lose 35-40 pounds to be healthy. I need a few ideas of what foods NOT to eat. Will it be ok to have bread once in a while? I know a lot of diets don't allow bread. Also, I crave Pepsi. Is there anything or any other kinds of soda (besides diet soda) that i can have? any kind of meal ideas will be welcome as well. please help me be healthy again!

2007-04-25 07:59:21 · 11 answers · asked by K. 1 in Diet & Fitness

A new employee is replacing an employee who left lets say old_employee@companyx.com , The mail system is Exchange Server, what is the best practice to allow the new employee access to the old_Employee account..
1. Simply rename the old account
2. Create a new_employee@companyx.com account and forward all the emails ..(but what about the past emails)

Basically the employ an operations assistant ,needs access to the person who left emails, we're just looking for the best way.. Remeber this is Exhange Server/Outlook

2007-04-25 07:59:14 · 4 answers · asked by acb29 4 in Computer Networking

A man voiced his intentions to 'jam my inbox full of spam'. What's the worst I can expect?

2007-04-25 07:59:01 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Is a conscientious objector someone who refuses to enter into military service upon being drafted/ or is it someone who is already in the army and then refuses to keep serving?

I would think that both would qualify as being conscientious objects.

Second Question:

If there was a draft, are there any penalties for being an objector? and how does one actually go about proving they are an objector?


Thanks!

2007-04-25 07:58:59 · 10 answers · asked by Ben 1 in Military

2007-04-25 07:58:52 · 11 answers · asked by icyhott4urmind 1 in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-25 07:58:47 · 16 answers · asked by toni 1 in Other - Skin & Body

2007-04-25 07:58:45 · 18 answers · asked by kaye j 3 in Homework Help

2007-04-25 07:58:25 · 4 answers · asked by Kabu 5 in Women's Health

I have the instruction but they suc.....I heard about marking the tire and do a full tire rotation, then measure the distance but do you have to convert that to metric?? you need a four digits....help

2007-04-25 07:58:25 · 3 answers · asked by william L 2 in Cycling

2007-04-25 07:58:21 · 14 answers · asked by José C 1 in History

2007-04-25 07:58:17 · 10 answers · asked by jay p 1 in Cancer

mobile world or t mobile ( they are all on the same network) is it affecting every one else on the same networks

2007-04-25 07:58:03 · 1 answers · asked by bjmlewis 5 in Cell Phones & Plans

so if u hate christians your basically an anti-semite like hitler.

2007-04-25 07:58:00 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Religion & Spirituality

Transending "" effect on people involved???? for example movie "Pretty Woman" -- Both Juila Roberts and richard gear literally goes through trans formation --- To give another example from Osho - he thinks that people who fully express their sexuality are - one who are "Awake" and are completely free from what he calls "Parental voices in our head" - possibly - "Indoctrination" - and some one who has taken birth again -----

2007-04-25 07:57:55 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Philosophy