All categories - 21 October 2007

2007-10-21 07:38:29 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

if u can read this to the end, then u really need to visit Yaba Psychiatric hospital because you're loco, like the goon that sent me this stuff.

please enjoy:

1. Sing the Simpsons theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip, "

5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".

10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.

11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

12. Sniffle incessantly.

13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

14. Name your dog "Dog." 15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."

18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".

19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."

20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.

21. Practice making fax and modem noises.

22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.

23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."

26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."

27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.

28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.

32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

34. Drum on every available surface.

35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.

36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.

37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.

38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks.

39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

41. Set alarms for random times.

42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.

43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.

44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

45. Honk and wave to strangers.

46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.

47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.

49. Wear your pants backwards.

50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.

51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"

52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

53. only type in lowercase.

54. don't use any punctuation either

55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.

57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.

60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.

61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."

62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.

63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.

65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."

66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.

68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."

69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

73. Drive half a block.

74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

75. Ask people what gender they are.

76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.

77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.

78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".

79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.

80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.

81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."

84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

86. Wear a LOT of cologne.

87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."

88. Sing along at the opera.

89. Mow your lawn with scissors.

90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"

91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."

92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."

94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."

95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

96. Never make eye contact.

97. Never break eye contact.

98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.

99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.

100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.

101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

2007-10-21 07:38:25 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-10-21 07:38:09 · 4 answers · asked by DivCW 2 in Engineering

A month ago I married a man with a four year old son (let's call him Johnny - not his real name). I began dating him when Johnny was 1.5 years old. I am very happily married and am completely in love with not only my husband, but also his son. He has custody of Johnny every other weekend and every Wednesday. Since we met I have gradually slipped into a "mommy" role when we have him. I do for/with Johnny all the things that a mother would do/be. I care for him the way I would care for my own child. My husband and I act as a two parent team, depending on eachother when Johhny is here. I feel that I am also raising his child along side him.

We recently had a heated argument about Johnny. I felt hurt when he said that the only people raising him were he and his ex-wife. Am I wrong for feeling like a parent? He is so comfortable with me doing the motherly duties, but claims that who I am will not impact Johnny's life. I guess I feel hut and underappreciated. Am I wrong?

2007-10-21 07:37:53 · 18 answers · asked by C.A.S. 2 in Marriage & Divorce

Your ChrisTmas purchases?

Cash, crediT card, savings, ChrisTmas club or oTher.

2007-10-21 07:37:46 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

what are ways to makw someone need to pee more badly?

2007-10-21 07:37:44 · 11 answers · asked by smexi_tewie 1 in Other - Health

Remember that it is only a theory and not a scientific law. Therefore, it could be true or it may not be true.

What do you think?

2007-10-21 07:37:42 · 21 answers · asked by USAman 6 in Polls & Surveys

Which is a real possibility if Republicans take as bad a beating at the Polls as the Beloved Leader Bush seems to be setting them up for.

Should we trust women again to get it ratified? Considering how dismally they failed before? Or should us guys take over the campaign and do it right this time?

2007-10-21 07:37:42 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Gender Studies

We got her from my brother. and they have no idea of what kind of dog this is. so im wondering if you guys knew. or thoughts.
she has a curly tail. shes still a baby.

http://s198.photobucket.com/albums/aa138/RiDE0RDiECHiCK/?action=view¤t=september29018.jpg
http://s198.photobucket.com/albums/aa138/RiDE0RDiECHiCK/?action=view¤t=October20105.jpg
http://s198.photobucket.com/albums/aa138/RiDE0RDiECHiCK/?action=view¤t=October20104.jpg
http://s198.photobucket.com/albums/aa138/RiDE0RDiECHiCK/?action=view¤t=October20102.jpg

2007-10-21 07:37:38 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Dogs

A childhood friend and I met up yest. We went to a cafe and a lady selling pink roses passed by and he bought me one. I don't know if it was considered a date. We talked about how he must go thru 10 days of not eating meat to support his family being Buddhist. We joked about how it is so hard for him to not eat meat. Everything went well, flirted, etc. Afterwards, he left to eat dinner at a vegetarian restaurant with his family. While he was there, he texted me "I hate eating veggies." And I texted right back (3 minutes later) that "Aww poor thing... hang in there hehe." Now I still haven't received any text or call back? Did I say or do something wrong? Should I have waited 1/2 hr? It has been 24 hrs since I heard back from him. Most importantly, did my message come across too mushy or sound like i want a relationship out of it already? Oh yea, and in his profile, it says he is looking for friendship, not dating. Do u think that may change? Does my text make him think i'm all over him

2007-10-21 07:37:37 · 14 answers · asked by Svetlana Z 1 in Singles & Dating

My cat became severely ill after eating one of the brands of tainted cat food. He eventually got a little better, but then suddenly got sicker than what he was before. This past Friday he died as a result of kidney failure. My family is trying to figure out where we can file a claim regarding this issue. Thanks in advance.

2007-10-21 07:37:37 · 2 answers · asked by honey_kisses86 1 in Cats

I have heard theres different brands of pills, what brand is best and why?? anything else rather than pills??

2007-10-21 07:37:09 · 3 answers · asked by Liz 3 in Women's Health

i just want to know if there is bussinees that i will invert my money into and get the interest back in short period of time for instant put $10 and get $13 in the bussiness . can any one guild me on this.

2007-10-21 07:36:56 · 5 answers · asked by ike e 2 in Investing

2007-10-21 07:36:56 · 5 answers · asked by iguanamoe6 1 in Renting & Real Estate

and no, i'm not fishing for compliments at all. every1's been telling me she's totally jealous & also lately she's been SO annoying 4 me to be around because she's always insulting me & saying my crush doesn't like me back (even though it's obvious to every1 he does).

my other friends told me they think she's jealous of me because
1- i'm skinny (in shape) and she's kind of chunky.
2- i'm pretty (like i said, no: i'm not fishing 4 compliments)
3- the guy i like likes me back & she has no chance with the guy she likes.
4- she's never had a real bf b4 but i have.

what should i do? this whole thing w/ her being jealous of me is turning her into a b*tch & i can't stand being around her anymore! thanks!

2007-10-21 07:36:56 · 21 answers · asked by bella♥ 5 in Singles & Dating

A legalized form of murder?

2007-10-21 07:36:52 · 63 answers · asked by 6-Pack? 2 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 07:36:51 · 16 answers · asked by legacyroadsideguy 1 in Cats

I almost never wear make up and cannot imagine what a fuss it would be to spend hours in front of the mirror on a daily basis!

2007-10-21 07:36:47 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 07:36:47 · 46 answers · asked by Buddie 7 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 07:36:46 · 11 answers · asked by Sage 6 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 07:36:44 · 11 answers · asked by mvarv82 1 in Words & Wordplay

why do we enjoy that feeling that someone loves you and you feel special.Can we be happy without having a special someone to make us feel good about ourselves.

2007-10-21 07:36:41 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

2007-10-21 07:36:39 · 18 answers · asked by ? 5 in Polls & Surveys

I love them! One of my favorite bands of all time. I love Jim Morrison, I love his voice and he's a great songwriter. Do you like them?

2007-10-21 07:36:37 · 12 answers · asked by BeatlesChick(♥'s music) 6 in Polls & Surveys

my newborn has a sunken soft spot on top of the head but he is having wet diapers and no diarrhea. hes been vomittin but only like once every two days, but i think the vomitting might be from not burping him or overfeeding but i really dont know. . i just want to know is the sunken fontanelles on my baby's head are normal

2007-10-21 07:36:32 · 8 answers · asked by cingo 1 in Newborn & Baby

where did he get all those wonderful toys

2007-10-21 07:36:32 · 5 answers · asked by David 6 in Movies

Ahhh! i cant stand it anymore, i have always wanted to get married and start a family, but it seems that everyone else is getting their deams met but me. i've been to five weddings in the last two years and none of them mine. And just this week one of my cousin's announces she's having a baby. dont get me wrong, i'm realy happy for her, but i've been bit by a major jealousy bug. three of my best friends have found there match and now two of my cousins! How do i find the right guy for me? how do i deal with my feelings of being the lonely singel girl?

2007-10-21 07:36:29 · 14 answers · asked by purplefairy49 2 in Weddings

How long has this show been on? I started watching last year and I love it. Do you think the teacher (cab't remember his name) is in love with melinda?

2007-10-21 07:36:28 · 3 answers · asked by pma 1 in Drama

Boot camp teenager deaths shock US

Aaron's bloody and battered journal contained an unbelievable account of torture, abuse and neglect.

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,10117,22577605-401,00.html?from=public_rss

"The report was published as a court in Florida began a manslaughter (WTF?!?) trial into the death of a 14-year-old boy who was filmed being beaten by camp guards minutes before he died.

Other xamples of abuse include youth being forced to eat their own vomit, denied adequate food, being forced to lie in urine or faeces, being kicked, beaten and thrown to the ground," investigator Gregory Kutz told a congressional education committee.

2007-10-21 07:36:15 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Law & Ethics

I cant figure any of these out!!
1)Find dy/dx if y=sin(x+y)
2)differentiate: y=csc^2(x)+cot^2(x)
3)differentiate: y=sin^2(t)-cos^2(t)
4)Find dy/dx if (x^2)-(y^2)=2xy
5)Find dy/dx for the equation (x^3)-(2(x^2)y)+3xy^2=38
6)Find dy/dx, then evaluate the derivative at the point (0,2): (x^2)-(2xy)=(y^2)-4
7)Find an equation for the tangent line to the graph of f(x)=√(x+1) at the point where x=3.8)
8)Find f '(x) for f(x)=2(x^2+5)^7

2007-10-21 07:36:09 · 1 answers · asked by Carolina 2 in Mathematics