101 ways to annoy people....(FUNNY)?

Question

if u can read this to the end, then u really need to visit Yaba Psychiatric hospital because you're loco, like the goon that sent me this stuff.

please enjoy:

1. Sing the Simpsons theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip, "

5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".

10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.

11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

12. Sniffle incessantly.

13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

14. Name your dog "Dog." 15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."

18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".

19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."

20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.

21. Practice making fax and modem noises.

22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.

23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."

26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."

27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.

28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.

32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

34. Drum on every available surface.

35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.

36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.

37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.

38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks.

39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

41. Set alarms for random times.

42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.

43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.

44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

45. Honk and wave to strangers.

46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.

47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.

49. Wear your pants backwards.

50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.

51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"

52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

53. only type in lowercase.

54. don't use any punctuation either

55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.

57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.

60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.

61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."

62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.

63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.

65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."

66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.

68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."

69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

73. Drive half a block.

74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

75. Ask people what gender they are.

76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.

77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.

78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".

79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.

80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.

81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."

84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

86. Wear a LOT of cologne.

87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."

88. Sing along at the opera.

89. Mow your lawn with scissors.

90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"

91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."

92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."

94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."

95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

96. Never make eye contact.

97. Never break eye contact.

98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.

99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.

100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.

101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

102: Make VERY long lists of stupid things.

Answer 1

You forgot one....posting very long lists.

Answer 2

my 25 ways to anoy someone.
1.watch lots of recordings of naruto and says it helps you with you'r social isues.
2.patch tape on someones arm and say it was leaking.
3.while someones watching a drama show always brake the mood.
4.when someones watching a drama show fake cry REALY loud so they can't hear.
5.act like you'r pulling something across the road and make the cars stop then after theres a big line pretend to let it go then fake cry acting like they ran it over.
6.go in someones sock drew and change the socks so they don't match and if they come in say they did't match.
7.hide and throw peices of paper at someone when they come to see who it is go to the other side of where you were hideing and leave,but leave a stickey paper saying we will be back,(reapeat).
8.steel money while playing manonopaly and say there is no where in the rule book that it says you can't steel money.
9.keep asking someone if they want somthing till they get so anoyed they say yes then give them the wrong thing.
10.hit someone when you win.
11.in a steam room keep repeating it's to cold.
12.when siting down pretend your driving a racecar and make realy loud noises when they try to talk get even louder.
13.put holes in all of another persons cloth pockets and if they ask say it's the newest fashion.
14.say in the daytime you can't see anything and at night say its wwwaaayyy to bright.
15.stab holes in all of someones soda cans and acuse the guy you just sawl walk bi,if they see you doing it say you'r hand slipped.
16.stomp on someones toe and say it was a bunny under your pants sleeve.
17.drive someone to there house and keep driving around it and keep asking "wheres your house again".
18.sing the spoungebob squarepants song over and over.
19.keep asking in a parking lot sticking half your body out the open door"are there any chicken people in the parking lot!?!"
20.keep saying you want something and when someone says the'll get you one say you hate those things and never wanted one.
21.spill all of another persons drinks on the flour and say it is a reteral for all you wishes to become true.when they talk say they just ruined the retiral and know have bad luck.
22.dress up as a rober and brake down someones door and say you'r stelling all of there air then fart.
23.invite someone to your house.invite them to you'r room.when they come out keep inviting them in and makung them go.then the last time he comes out slam the door and run.
24.say you know all the words in the dictonary and if someone chalenges you sing the alphobet.
25.put a fake ticket on someones car and make it say "traffic ticket for being in trafik.

Answer 3

u forgot one : 102. tell some one to read 101 things to annoy people.

Answer 4

Long but funny! 10!

Answer 5

Those were hilrious I read all in 10 minutes

Answer 6

50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register THIS CRACKED ME UP! LOL!

Answer 7

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaoh wow. aaaaaaaaaaaai cant believe i read the whole thing aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa HOW MANY THINGS AM I DOING ON THE LIST TODAY IS NOVEMBER 14 2028

Answer 8

I can't believe I read all of that , it was funny though,haha, my eyes hurt.lol, I guess ..

Answer 9

103. In a restraunt , with a serious face, ask for a "diet water"

Answer 10

wow, that was a waste of my time...

jkjkjk

it was pretty funny!

i like the crop circle idea =]


heres another one:

when at a restaurant && they ask you what you want to drink, tell them "diet water, please, im trying to watch my figure"

haha well i think its funny!