All categories - 25 December 2006

On the first day, God created the dog and said:

"Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said: "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?"

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said: "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said: "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.

2006-12-25 07:57:53 · 14 answers · asked by a m 4 in Jokes & Riddles

I need to change the fuel pump in my 1992 Toyota Camry and I know it is pretty simple but I would like instructions if possible.

2006-12-25 07:57:45 · 4 answers · asked by superhomer1221 2 in Maintenance & Repairs

Doesn't matter where you're from or where you travelled to.

2006-12-25 07:57:27 · 10 answers · asked by boots&hank 5 in Other - Destinations

...the Sugar Rush, or do my Tastebuds need Upgrading?!?
Sex is great, but Chocolate......wowee zowee!!!

2006-12-25 07:57:22 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Food & Drink

2006-12-25 07:57:08 · 10 answers · asked by wazaaaaaaaaaaaa 1 in Software

Cause she has a man made body.
Cause there jealous.

2006-12-25 07:57:03 · 10 answers · asked by Jady B 1 in Celebrities

Molestation Accusations?
Do anyone else hear of the story of two high school girls who claimed their P.E. teacher was molesting him. He lost his wife, children, and his family. Finally, the girls confessed that they made this up because they were upset about their grades. How ridiculous people are. How could someone say something like that over a grade? I hate to state this but women can call rape on a guy just for revenge. does anyone else think society favors women more? If a girl claims her husband beat up on her the world automatically believes her and on her side. The sadest part is that the people who are really beat up and raped are usually never believed

2006-12-25 07:56:59 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Cultures & Groups

This is my picture: http://tinypic.com/3y5zok7.jpg

this is the girl i loves myspace: www.myspace.com/kirstiex3

So i took everyones advise and i started talking to her, but everytime i go up to her in school she says thats she has to get to class

my friend said i'm too ugly for her, is she too hot for me?

i always have daydreams about her, about her hot body on me and stuff is the normal to?

2006-12-25 07:56:47 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-25 07:56:47 · 2 answers · asked by softball Queen 4 in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-25 07:56:34 · 3 answers · asked by N H K 1 in Diet & Fitness

2006-12-25 07:56:27 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Military

2006-12-25 07:56:26 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Desktops

today we had to get measured for dance... im bigger than the tiny twicks not tatlly fat.. they said my mesurments out loud and everyone laughed... im so embaressed... what do i do

2006-12-25 07:56:23 · 19 answers · asked by im_suuweeet 2 in Dancing

i am pissed off with this internet dating agency i joined, i have met some horrible men on their and i don,t know why bover anymore i wonder how many more men are horrible. its not easy meeting a single man in his forties and fifties.

2006-12-25 07:56:17 · 22 answers · asked by denise g 2 in Marriage & Divorce

Would you rather date someone with a super attractive face, but they're overweight? Or someone with a killer body but a face only a mother could love? I know ultimately this stuff isn't supposed to matter, but if two people like this walked up to you and asked you on a date, who would you most likely pick and why?

2006-12-25 07:56:13 · 11 answers · asked by Quintessa 2 in Singles & Dating

For free if possible? and for reference the call is from the uk to canada...

2006-12-25 07:56:03 · 10 answers · asked by Jim Bean 2 in Other - Computers

1. Today I have a chance to join the human race for a few hours.
2. Aw geez what a bunch that is: A meathead, A dingbat, a woman's lib and a bald headed kid.
3. Sometimes doing something is worse than doing nothing .
4. Nip it! NIP IT IN THE BUD!!
5. A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.
6. His idea of culture is an undershirt with sleeves.

2006-12-25 07:56:00 · 2 answers · asked by I am Sunshine 6 in Television

books on web design , computers,computer programmings etc ??

is it better to buy instead??

which bookshops sell computer books n web design books??


,

2006-12-25 07:55:52 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singapore

I haven't even had a drink yet!

2006-12-25 07:55:51 · 9 answers · asked by CoolLuke 7 in Polls & Surveys

basicly what is CPU and waht does it do?

2006-12-25 07:55:46 · 6 answers · asked by aka shugo 1 in Other - Hardware

Laptops that would be $200.00 - $300.00 after rebate.

2006-12-25 07:55:46 · 7 answers · asked by nali111 2 in Laptops & Notebooks

2006-12-25 07:55:35 · 1 answers · asked by mars19jk2000 1 in Other - Europe

Hooking up a DEH-P680MP to a 2002 honda civic. I took out an old aftermarket stereo and just spliced the new wired to the old ones. All color coded so it should haver been an easy swap, but the stereo doesnt seem to have power. There is one wire on the back that I am not sure if it needs to be hooked up for the stereo to work or if I bought a bad deck. The wire is Orange/White and in the manual sayt "To lighting switch terminal" I DONT KNOW WHAT THE MEANS. PLEASE HELP IF YOU CAN. THANKS!

2006-12-25 07:55:35 · 4 answers · asked by Samuel S 2 in Car Audio

2006-12-25 07:55:29 · 6 answers · asked by old.gringo 1 in United States

he is 13 turning 14 and he is really hot and he is a prep. he wears abercrombie and fitch. u know that kinda thing.... wat should i get him for a late xmas present?

2006-12-25 07:55:28 · 2 answers · asked by music_lover2232 1 in Friends

2006-12-25 07:55:27 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Where can i get the heater without a fan .. i want to use it in the office...and dont want one with the fan to disturb other people + the cubes are not much clean and dont want the dust to fly away and make me sick

2006-12-25 07:55:21 · 3 answers · asked by Inquistive_man 3 in Other - Home & Garden

If so, How do we discover it?
How can this purpose be used to its full potential?
If not, Why?
I think we do but Im not going to say anything in detail I just want to hear some good explanations on why or why not.

2006-12-25 07:54:59 · 16 answers · asked by Sephiroth~The One Winged Angel~ 5 in Psychology

2006-12-25 07:54:57 · 6 answers · asked by Elizabeth 2 in Makeup

2006-12-25 07:54:50 · 3 answers · asked by David B 6 in Other - Electronics