All categories - 12 November 2007

In the human body, which organ is in charge?

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge.

The brain said: "I should be in charge, because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen."

"I should be in charge," said the heart, "because I pump the blood and circulate oxygen all over the body, so without me you'd all waste away."

"I should be in charge," said the stomach, "because I process food and give all of you energy."

"I should be in charge," said the rectum, "because I'm responsible for waste removal."

All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight. Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, and the blood was toxic. Eventually the other organs gave in. They all agreed that the rectum should be the boss.

The moral of the story?

You don't have to be smart or important to be in charge... just an ***hole.

2007-11-12 20:57:03 · 10 answers · asked by jake5282 2 in Jokes & Riddles

surely it is beans on toast

2007-11-12 20:56:52 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-12 20:55:35 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-12 20:54:38 · 5 answers · asked by tim j 1 in Other - Family & Relationships

how do you feel being a smoker knowing that it is a danger to your children?

2007-11-12 20:54:33 · 16 answers · asked by noot 3 in Parenting

2007-11-12 20:54:33 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy

She was in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast.
He walked in; She turned and said,
You've got to make love to me this very moment."
His eyes lit up and he thought,

"This is my lucky day."
Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraced her
and then gave it his all;
right there on the kitchen table.
Afterwards she said,

"Thanks,"
and returned to the stove.
More than a little puzzled, he asked,

"What was that all about?"
She explained,
"The egg timer's broken."

2007-11-12 20:54:13 · 14 answers · asked by jake5282 2 in Jokes & Riddles

Cuz i only left mine in for a week a the bast*rds dead.

2007-11-12 20:54:07 · 9 answers · asked by Deborah C 3 in Jokes & Riddles

i have not so old western digital harddisk,
which only damage at several part of the harddisk and i can still use it not as the primary harddisk but i only use it as secondary harddisk.

But after i low-level-formatted the harddisk (my friend advise me to do so) the harddisk is now officially dead. what went wrong, and how can i revive the harddisk back to life. is it possible to revive it? since its not a physical damage, it just software damaged i think.

2007-11-12 20:53:55 · 2 answers · asked by xc 3 in Other - Hardware

I was talking to a guy the other day, until he started doing this. I told him I didn't want to talk to him anymore because it wasn't cool that he was big, but thought it was ok to make fun of big females, and he got angry!! Then he started to make fun of ME for being fat!! I weigh a whopping 130. At 5'4"! What's wrong with him I wonder? I was thinking he's just mean.

2007-11-12 20:53:47 · 14 answers · asked by Me M 1 in Diet & Fitness

I have a 4 day old baby and I'm trying to breastfeed her. My nipples are VERY sore and cracked although Iam putting on cream etc. Still waiting for midwives visit to advise on correct latching. Last night whilst breast feeding baby started spitting out milk with blood in it, making me very upset for her. I really dont want to use powdered milk but I was thinking for the next 2-3 days until my nipples get better can I use it in addition to pumped milk? will she still latch on if i do this?

2007-11-12 20:53:43 · 15 answers · asked by Sarah 2 in Newborn & Baby

well it is said that records of christs first 30 years are unavailable and hence there is a lot of specualtion as to his whereabouts. some suggest he was in india and received his initial teaching from a budhist monk. there are lot of other things too which i wont mention of fear of hurting emotions but you can look up the topic in wikipedia as lost years of christ!
read it an tell me something else you know about it; or maybe what you feel about it!
personaly speaking i find more on the lines of da vinci code; which by the way has been thrashed by all concerning proffesional in the respective fields!

2007-11-12 20:53:42 · 15 answers · asked by Chanakya M 2 in Mythology & Folklore

...in his eyes? Or her eyes if you're a guy?

2007-11-12 20:53:15 · 12 answers · asked by Skatermomof5 7 in Polls & Surveys

And, just to return the favor, here are a few for you:

Did you know the modern dime has 118 ridges on its edge?
No, Silly! I didn't count 'em! I read it in the following link:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dime_(United_States_coin)

and, one more to share with Thanksgiving dinner guests....
Pilgrims didn't use forks - only spoons, knives, and fingers.
http://www.amusingfacts.com/cgi-bin/search.cgi?query=Pilgrims

So, now you know what you have to do.... if you want your
Thanksgiving to be truly authentic, commemorative.... and messy!

THANKS for your answers, of course.

2007-11-12 20:53:09 · 11 answers · asked by 1staricy2nite 4 in Polls & Surveys

JUST WANT TO BE PREPARED :)

2007-11-12 20:52:53 · 4 answers · asked by oman 2 in Credit

hey i hv one questions...m married jst 4 mnths bk,my periods were regular befr marriage,now thy r irregular,y so???morvr i m feelin bulge in my belly also,can nebdy suggest me reasn

2007-11-12 20:52:47 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Women's Health

Statistics from websites would help. :) Thanks.

2007-11-12 20:52:45 · 5 answers · asked by helpinghand 2 in Philippines

...assuming both cars have approximately equal weight and power and that the race track has a good number of turns. If yes, why? If not, then why do popular motorsports (F-1..etc) only allow RWD?

2007-11-12 20:52:26 · 2 answers · asked by Snowie 6 in Other - Cars & Transportation

On a boeing 747 how long does it take to cover 1 mile?

2007-11-12 20:52:25 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Aircraft

Hello,
my details: DOB: 9th dec. 1974
Time: 12:10 hrs
Place: Pattikonda,India


Can anyone please tell me when does my sade starts and ends? i have already suffered a lot without any peace. How is Saturn in my horoscope? What else should i do to make this period bearable?

Thanking you all
Regards
Praveena

2007-11-12 20:52:14 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Horoscopes

2007-11-12 20:51:58 · 38 answers · asked by just4u_vishal143 1 in Baby Names

The most famous women's player would be Mia Hamm. But how many people would be true-blue fans to this USA player when there are players like Cristiano Ronaldo and Fransesc Fabregas? Please help support women's rights...

2007-11-12 20:51:35 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Women's Football

If a = i - 2k & b = j + k, find a X b

how would i sketch a, b, & a X b as vectors starting at the origin

2007-11-12 20:51:25 · 1 answers · asked by jwang417 1 in Mathematics

thanks!

2007-11-12 20:51:15 · 12 answers · asked by quiteness2007@yahoo.cn 1 in Garden & Landscape

If so, what does it take? Can it be an immediate change or is it a long process?

2007-11-12 20:51:12 · 8 answers · asked by ele 5 in Psychology

Try this bracelet: if it fits you wear it; but if it hurts you, throw it away no matter how shiny.

2007-11-12 20:51:12 · 9 answers · asked by rusalka 3 in Quotations

The Price

In the morning i feel like vanishing
with all the fragments of my undoing
it scares me to feel the price..
the price i will be paying..
as moments of disarray
come into play...
I pull the sheets to cover my eyes
wishing they were all just lies...
last night i prayed for an eternal slumber
but all i am now is just a little half sober

with all the fragments of my undoing
it scares me to feel the price i am paying..

2007-11-12 20:51:05 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Poetry

Let's face it, English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant.
No ham in the hamburger.
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England.
And French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted.
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly,
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing?
If the plural of tooth is teeth,
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth?
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
What the heck does a humanitarian eat?
Why do people recite at a play,
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways?
How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day
And as cold as hell on another?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down.
And in which you fill in a form,
By filling it out.
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers.
And it reflects the creativity of the human race.
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why,
When the stars are out, they are visible
But when the lights are out, they are invisible
And it's why when I wind up my watch,
It starts.
But when I wind up this poem,
It ends.

2007-11-12 20:50:15 · 13 answers · asked by Sparky 5 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-11-12 20:49:47 · 2 answers · asked by jwang417 1 in Mathematics