>THE PENIS WANTS A RAISE
>
>
>I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following
>reasons:
> >
> >1-------- I do physical labor.
> >
> >2.------- I work at great depths.
> >
> >3.------- I plunge head first into everything I do.
> >
> >4.------- I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
> >
> >5.--------I work in a damp environment.
> >
> >6. -------I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
> >
> >7.------- I work in high temperatures.
> >
> >8. -------My work exposes me to diseases.
> >
> >Reply:
> >
> >Dear Penis,
> >
> >After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have
> >raised,
> >the management denies your request for the following reasons:
> >
> >1. ------You do not work 8 hours straight.
> >
> >2. ------You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH brief work
>
> >period.
> >
> >3. ------You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
> >
> >4. ------You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen
> >visiting other locations.
> >
> >5. ------You do not take initiative -- you need to be pressured and
> >stimulated in order to start working.
> >
> >6. ------You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
> >
> >7. ------You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as
>
> >wearing the correct protective clothing.
> >
> >8. ------You will retire LONG before you are 65.
> >
> >9. ------You are unable to work double shifts.
> >
> >10. ------You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have
>
> >completed the assigned task.
> >
> >11. ------And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen
> >entering
> >and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags.
> >
> >Sincerely, The Management
> >
> >
> >Five reasons not to be a penis:
> >
> >1. ------You're bald your whole life.
> >2. ------You have a hole in your head.
> >3. ------Your neighbors are nuts.
> >4. ------The guy behind you is an asshole and...
> >5. ------Every time you get excited, you throw up and then faint
2007-06-04
22:13:41
·
41 answers
·
asked by
Anonymous
in
Jokes & Riddles