All categories - 28 February 2007

It seems that when the good Lord was making the world, he called Man aside and bestowed upon him 20 years of normal sxx life. Man was horrified, but the Creator refused to budge.

Then the Lord called the Monkey and gave him 20 years. "But I don't need 20 years," said the Monkey. "Ten years is plenty." Man spoke up and said, "May I have the other 10 years?" The Monkey agreed.

The Lord called the Lion next and also gave him 20 good years. The Lion also only wanted 10, so again Man spoke up, "May I have your other ten years?" "Of course," said the Lion.

Then came the Donkey, who was also granted 20 years. Like the others, 10 was more than enough. Man again asked for the spare ten years, and he got them.

This explains why Man has 20 years of normal sxx life, 10 years of monkeying around, 10 years of lion bout it, and 10 years of making an axs out of himself.

2007-02-28 22:11:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

The American Artist Ice T went to the Third World. He said that people in the First World,
"Have it good."
Do you have any idea what it's like to sleep on a
dirt floor at night? Having to smell the manure
and urine from yourself having to use the restroom behind your little shack?
Look around you my freinds! And count your blessings.

Sadeek

2007-02-28 22:11:35 · 9 answers · asked by Sadeek Muhammad 2 in Other - Society & Culture

Ever seen something that you can't explain or felt something near you but nothing is there..........Whoooo! how Scary is this one........dont have nightmares...........................

2007-02-28 22:11:29 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Family & Relationships

why at an alcoholics anonymous do they start by saying

"hi im bill and im an alcoholic"

or whatever their name is.
?????????????????????????????????????????????????

2007-02-28 22:11:20 · 13 answers · asked by Gary F 3 in Beer, Wine & Spirits

2007-02-28 22:11:18 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pain & Pain Management

the problem is quite recent and comes as soon as the climax is reached. its is situated near the ovaries i think??
what's the problem???? help!!!

2007-02-28 22:11:10 · 4 answers · asked by T-spooon 2 in Women's Health

Its had noisey tappets from when i brought it but recently I changed the dizzy cap. Since the change the noise has got louder. is this ok?? do i need to change them. ?? Please help as Im worried it wil mess up my much loved bimmer. :0)

2007-02-28 22:11:03 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Car Makes

thank you for any help

2007-02-28 22:11:02 · 2 answers · asked by oif1983 3 in Mathematics

who knows that your vote is precious enough to back up your team to win the ICC World Cup 2007 for you. Please vote here http://cricket.hedir.com/

2007-02-28 22:10:57 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Cricket

Three guys were driving down a road in the middle of nowhere. the names were Shut Up, Sh*t, and Manners. Well, about a mile down the road, Manners jumps out of the car and streaks out into the desert. A second later, Sh*t jumps out and runs after Manners, yelling "Come back!!!"
Now Shut up is all alone and ponders if he should stop and wait for them to come back. "Nah," he thinks and continues on his journey, speeding up a little. Another mile goes by a cop pulls up behind him with his lights on, and pulls him over.
"Did you know you were speeding back there?" the cop asks.
"I was? I didn't realize." he says.
"Well, what's your name sonny?"the cop asks.
"Shut Up."
"what?!"
"I said Shut Up"
"Excuse Me!?" the cop says incredulous.
"I SAID SHUT UP! Did you get it that time?"
By now the cop is very piss.ed and says, "where are your manners!?"
"He went to pick up Shi*"

2007-02-28 22:10:54 · 2 answers · asked by lynn 5 in Jokes & Riddles

I asked a question earlier on a song by The Beach Boys... the one about the girl driving around in her Dads car... Song called Fun, Fun, Fun....
So.. in it the car is called a T-Bird.... What kind of car is that?
Any pics?

xx

2007-02-28 22:10:47 · 14 answers · asked by *BURNY* 5 in Other - Cars & Transportation

2007-02-28 22:10:43 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

i am moving into a new house that has plasterboard walls (only 5 yrs old) could someone help to tell me the best things to use to put pictures and shelves up? i am used to old house walls and brickwork. Dont want to ruin walls or have shelves fall down and am a novice at the DIY since husband left thanks.

2007-02-28 22:10:38 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Decorating & Remodeling

I've been watching the View a bit ever since the whole Donald Trump/Rosie thing. Anyway, after watching it for awhile I notice that Joy Behar is probably the funniest one of all. Rosie is the 2nd funniest, and basically Barbara Walters and Joy are not the funniest. However, I do notice that Rosie, Joy, and even sometimes Barbara don't treat Elisabeth with too much respect. Personally, I think Elisabeth has a very annoying voice, isn't funny, and I also don't like some of her views. However, on yesterday's show where Rosie says "Calling you young so you don't understand is my way of controlling the rage over your ignorant comments". I was like wow! Joy even accused Elisabeth of name-calling when Elisabeth was only describing people. Rosie and Joy rarely give Elisabeth a chance to say anything and well it's more of an observation on my part more than a complaint because I can't stand Elisabeth's voice anyway. I'm just wondering why these 3 ladies don't really respect Elisabeth.

2007-02-28 22:10:33 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Television

q:1if a,b,c are positive numbers in geometric progression,show that loga,logb and logc are in arithmetic progression
q:2 the functions f is given by f:x=log(1+x) where x belongs to real no and x greater than -1.express the definition of f inverse in a similar form.
q:3jacques is saving for a new car which will cost $29000.he saves by putting $400 a month into saving account which gives 0.1% interest per month.after how many months will he be able to buy his car.assume it doesnot increase in price
note down:
answer for q3 is 71
answer for 2 is ex-1
plz solve them for me

2007-02-28 22:10:31 · 2 answers · asked by ghulamalimurtaza 3 in Mathematics

2007-02-28 22:10:29 · 14 answers · asked by lee w 2 in Law Enforcement & Police

1) Please give me the equation whose graph is all vertical and horizontal lines whose intercepts are integers (e.g. x = 1, y = 2, x = -5, etc.)

2) Please give me the equation whose graph is all integers points in the cartesian plane, e.g. (1,2), (3,-4), (0,33), etc.

^_^

thanks

^_^

2007-02-28 22:10:07 · 3 answers · asked by kevin! 5 in Mathematics

2007-02-28 22:10:03 · 3 answers · asked by hellowl 1 in Horoscopes

2007-02-28 22:09:55 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Golf

or is that just a purely animalistic thing?

2007-02-28 22:09:53 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-02-28 22:09:39 · 13 answers · asked by mrugz 1 in Friends

To drive from France to Spain

2007-02-28 22:09:32 · 5 answers · asked by WOLF 1 in Other - Europe

a diet coke please teehee Oh yeah and an apple pie to. BONG!!!!

2007-02-28 22:09:28 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-02-28 22:09:16 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in History

I went to a meeting this morning at 10am. My truck started fine,
drove perfect...even told me I needed to get more fuel. I come out of my meeting an hour later and it won't start. Won't even turn over. Tried jumping it, no dice. I came home to read about the PATS and it mentioned if the THEFT light flashes, you got a bad key/bad ignition ring connection. So naturally, I go back to my truck, which is sitting at a pizza place, and looked for symptoms of PATS malfunction. Nothing, nothing is/was wrong with my truck. The lights work, all of the diagnostics come on, fuel pump comes on, it even dims the lights when I try to start it. I'm so mad I'm shaking.

What do I do? It seems so easy to fix, but everything I have tried hasn't worked.

Regards,

Sean

2007-02-28 22:09:11 · 11 answers · asked by Sean 1 in Maintenance & Repairs

Its had noisey tappets from when i brought it but recently I changed the dizzy cap. Since the change the noise has got louder. is this ok?? do i need to change them. ??

2007-02-28 22:08:50 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Car Makes

im on a diet,yet again,has any one got any recipes for low fat/low calorie meals,getting really bored with jacket potaoes lol
thanks

2007-02-28 22:08:47 · 39 answers · asked by tammy4177 1 in Cooking & Recipes

i'm a fiipina married to an american citizen for almost 10 months already,my husband filed the k-3 and k-4 visa petition last august and he got an immigration lawyer to speed up and to help us with the process. unfortunately,the USCIS informed us that they just received the papers last dec. until now our papers are still on pending status. does anyone can tell me on how long do we still have to wait after the first step in the USCIS.

2007-02-28 22:08:44 · 3 answers · asked by Shelly Ann C 1 in Immigration

We all know that J.K.Rowling is the writer of Harry Potter Series.
I want to share sumthings with u . . . . . . .
Firstly some facts related to J.K.Rowling and her Harry Potter Series . . . . .
1) The first story written by Rowling was 'A Rabbit' when she was just 5-6 years old.
2) Her nick name is jo as her friends called her.
3) Rowling started writin The Harry potter series in 1993.
4) Rowling created the child wizard harry potter while travelling in a train from manchester to london.
5) It took 5 years for rowling to complete the 1st harry potter book of the series.
6) Harry potter was 11 years old in the 1st book and the series will end when he is 17.
7) The original title of 'Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's stone' which is the 1st part of Harry Potter series was 'Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone'.
8) Rowling got all the interesting names and words for the Harry potter book from her sister,from places in her travels and from stories in history.
That's all i know.
Secondly an information on its next release . . . . . . . .
The 5th part of the Harry Potter Series i.e 'Harry Potter and The Order of Phoenix' is goin to b released on June 21,2007.
Thirdly a few Questions for ur sake . . . . . .
1) What if u got admission in Hogwarts,the wizardy school ?
2) What if u got a chance to act in the next Harry Potter film ?
3) What if u get a chance 2 meet the heroes and heroines of the Harry Potter film ?
4) For boys :
If u were given d role of Harry Potter in d film then . . .
For girls :
If u were given d role of Herminie in d film then . . .
5) Would u stop writin Harry Potter stories if u were J.K.Rowling ?

Lets see who does the best job.
Dont forget 2 star . . . . .

2007-02-28 22:08:42 · 8 answers · asked by SE7EN 3 in Movies