The Liar:
I am a liar. This, in itself, is such a simple parse, but to finally say it, to have it out there for all the word to know, to hear, mean’s that it’s now been liberated from myself and that I may be seen as…just me. Now I may be able to just be myself an s, I guess, I’ll see who stays by my side through it all and who runs away and heads for the hills, so to speak.
Actually I haven’t even been honest with myself for so long that now…I don’t even know who I am anymore. I have become such a good liar that I have not only fooled everyone around me, I’ve also fooled myself. The people who I love, or say I love, I feel they truly love me back…but I’m not really sure if it’s me they love, or just the web of lies I’ve spun. Neither friends nor family are truly safe from my venom.
I have built up this life, this lie, I have so carefully and precisely. I have strung every lie through the rest so that I am completely covered. That I thought I would never be able to fall from my insidious pedestal. I thought that no one would be able see through it all to see the real person I actually am, and so far…no one has.
However, in truly believing this I, again, lied to myself. I truth, if one single story of mine falls through, then I too shall come down with it. I will be within the rubble, undistinguishable from the rest of my lies. My stories.
But now I have a true reason to want to come clean. To admit and accept all of my faults…and my good traits as well. (Even though, these “good traits” I’ve never seen myself…) What could this “great reason” be that would make me give up this entire life that I have so carefully pieced together and made myself be? What could it be that would make me willingly let it all shatter around my feet? What could possibly make me want to stand here, just as I am and let the world see me totally nude of all my lies, just I am.
Actually “who?” would be a better question in this case. So who is it, you may be asking…
Well this person I has been there for me for me my whole life. Through everything, from the highest highs to the lowest lows, they’ve seen me through. So, now, the only right thing I can do is to finally tell the truth, the whole truth, the real truth to this person. And pray that in the end they can still see me and love me the same way they always have.
I’m sure that you’re still probably wondering who this great person is. Who on earth could be this special? And by now you’re assuming that it’s the “next great love” in my life. And, in a way, you’re right…but in the way that it really counts, you’re oh so wrong. Actually this person is none other then…me.
But, in the end, isn’t honesty to yourself what really counts? Then again, I could be totally wrong in thinking and believing this.
Who knows really? I mean, this whole letter could just be a show, a scam. Maybe I’m lying now…we all know that I could be. I guess ya never really know, huh…?
2007-09-16
15:44:34
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3 answers
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asked by
♥femme fatale♥
2