If my husband really tries his best to change himself for me, should I need to give him another chance to save our marriage? My husband’s friends and also all my family in China told me that it’s only fair for him if I give him one more chance. But what if I’m unable to love him again? I can’t return love back to him that because my feeling for him is already gone year by year and day by day since I have been tried very hard to work with our marriage for over 20 years. And now also because of my mind and my heart only have my boyfriend – the man who I love, is in Albuquerque, NM. All my family in China told me that I should stay with my husband, because they worry about my husband will kill himself again if I left him. They also worry about me since I have never been an independent woman before. They worry about that I might lost everything in my life in the end if I left my husband and also if my boyfriend will no longer stay with me because he can’t wait for me so long for my divorce matters. What a miserable situation front of me? My boyfriend said that my husband and I are co-dependence; it means that we just can’t be alone to each other. Is that true? My husband said, he can’t live without me, otherwise his life will become meaningless and of cause he evidently loves me in deeply and also because he get use to dependent me for many years (that’s’ include my son), and I always take care of them for cooking and clearing, etc. As of me, I am afraid of being along because I never try it before and I also need a man to take care of me. So, that’s why my boyfriend said, my husband and I are co-dependence. In this kind of situation, I still staying in the marriage which is so ridiculous. I’m unable to love my husband again but I still stay in our marriage. Is this right for me to stay? Please give me some strength, advice and some reasons to let me go and move on to my own life! Is this selfish if I try to find my own happiness that without take care of my son and my husband? Because my husband told me that “You can’t just live for yourself that without the responsibility for your family. If so, I already left you long time ago.” Also in Chinese traditional way, people will consider that you are selfish if you do so. Is this right for our morality?
2006-09-07
02:54:20
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9 answers
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asked by
Marilyn
2
in
Marriage & Divorce