One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me,"What
setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."
And they say blondes are dumb...
_______________________
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the
happiest woman in the world"
The woman says, "I'll miss you..."
_______________________
"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he steps out of the
shower. Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the
lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
_______________________
He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I have wanted to make love to you
really badly.
She said - Well, you succeeded.
______________________
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said - That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I
Sit on the sofa and fart.
_______________________
He said - What have you been doing with all the grocery money I give you?
She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror
______________________
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
_______________________
A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th >wedding
anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that
because they had been such a devoted couple she would grant each of them a
very special wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.
Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger...
Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!!
Gotta love that fairy!
__________________
2006-08-26
23:41:30
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13 answers
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asked by
Sangy .
4
in
Jokes & Riddles