I acted like I was happy for years, but in the past year I've gotten really screwed up. I get randomly sad or frustrated, and little things set me off (when I'm not PMSing). It got a lot worse last week when one of my friends said he "can't deal with me" and that I "act bipolar when I'm not PMSing." Since then, I can't eat, I avoid my friends, I constantly feel bad, I don't want to do anything, and I just hate everything and most everyone. I have frequent urges to punch random strangers (or friends) and to kick things. People try to comfort me, but I just run away or tell them I don't want to talk about it.
Some of my friends aren't taking my feelings seriously, because I have a reputation for being moody. It seems that, for people who call themselves my friends, they don't like me very much (they complain about things I do a lot).
Something that really disturbs me is that I'm alienating my friends and I barely even care.
(My family has a history of depression.)
2007-03-27
12:40:35
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