I am very confused right now. I have had a best friend for almost 15 years, he is a guy of course. For a long time it was mostly fun and hanging out. We always flirted in a joking way and really had no REAL attraction to each other. We even wathched each other go from one relationship after another. Recently, there has been a change in our relationship. Around 4 years ago, we became extremely close, hanging out every day all night long with everyone and just us 80 percent of the time. No matter how much I fought it, I found myself falling in love with him (Which I never thought I would with the type of person he is.) He has always been a woman target, and i am the only one he never tried to disrespect or treat wrongly. We started becoming more serious, and it was very evident that HE and I were fighting the feelings. It got so bad that when he brought US up in conversation, I freaked out and told him I didn't want to loose him as a friend..... Then....he met someone else. For a long time I fought my feelings until I finally told him. since then, being that he was still with HER,.. he rarely called me and only seen me once in a while (Like every 6 months to a year) He got her pregnant (and didn't tell me at first until I found out from his brother) He tried to make it work with her(for the baby's sake), but she always cheated on him, and they eventually broke up). During this time..when we DID see each other, we just couldnt hold back our feelings. He IS NOT the type to tell ANYONE his feelings, but he would tell ME. He has gotten jelouse of things and told me I was blind. I been dating another guy for a long time, and he says that the guy doesn't deserve me. Well now... about eight months later, we met again the other night. we both know he's been on and off with that girl for a while, but he always reassures me that they're broke up. he and I never had sex and he hasnt ever really tried (he says I mean more than that to him). Well to get to the point, he always brings up our relationship now, but this time he told me I was too good for HIM. I have been acting not that interested in him (playing hard to get so to speak). It was weird, but he also told me its over, I think, but I was a little too tipsy to be sure for sure. Out of paranoya, I texed him today and told him "Hey Goof! U wr acting really weird the other night. U were acting MAD at me or SOMEthing. I think u told me it was over!lol! I think u were so drunk u though I was (his exes name here)." Any ways, I try to hide my feelings as much as possible and play "friends". Mainly because I am so in love with him that I have no clue how to act, I'm afraid to push him away, because one minute he's jelouse or telling me how special I am, and the next he is saying stuff like that. This feeling I have for him is so weird. Instead of healing as time goes on, year after year, I think of him and he claims the same. Its like we're still fighting our feelings. When we're together it's like we pick up where we left off. What should I do? After that tex, he still didn't call me? How can I get his feelings to switch back for me if he lost them? PLEASE I need your help. I email every site possible about this and no one ever emails me back. What should I do? Should I tex him ONE more time to tell him that I get what he's saying... that him telling me I was too good for him was just letting me down gently, or was he playing games cause I am so confusing as well? There is so much more to this, but I have already overdone this letter. He even SAYS I'm confusing. I even acted like I have a crush on someone else just so he don't scare off and run the other way? Please, what should I do? I am in love with him.
2007-11-30
15:07:18
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18 answers
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Anonymous