All categories - 29 July 2007

Briefing on Land Mines ***
A young, freshly minted lieutenant was sent to Bosnia as part of the peace keeping mission. During a briefing on land mines, the captain asked for questions.

Our intrepid solder raised his hand and asked, "If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?"

"Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area."


Stopped by a Cop ****
A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror. He thinks "I can outrun this guy," so he floors it and the race is on. The cars are racing down the highway -- 60, 70, 80, 90 miles an hour. Finally, as his speedometer passes 100, the guy figures "what the heck," and gives up. He pulls over to the curb. The police officer gets out of his cruiser and approaches the car. He leans down and says "Listen mister, I've had a really lousy day, and I just want to go home.Give me a good excuse and I'll let you go."

The man thought for a moment and said, "Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser in my rear view mirror, I thought you were that officer and you were trying to give her back to me!"

The cop let him go.

2007-07-29 23:39:34 · 34 answers · asked by PnkFlr 5 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-07-29 23:39:33 · 6 answers · asked by nikonan21 1 in Netherlands

I am a single mum of two babies. One 13 mnths and one 2 mnths old. The 2 mnth old is still waking at night about evry 4 hrs to feed and the 13 mnth still wakes occassionaly at night. I am so so exhausted all the time and extremely tired. The father never takes them at night and I never get a break. Has anyone had babies this close in age? Does it get easier as they get older? Any advise, please help. Im at breaking point.

2007-07-29 23:39:29 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Newborn & Baby

i wil like to audition

2007-07-29 23:39:13 · 3 answers · asked by *♥♥♥gigglez♥♥♥* 1 in Theater & Acting

2007-07-29 23:38:48 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Society & Culture

are they generally friendlier? polite?

2007-07-29 23:38:44 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Society & Culture

What colour hair do guys prefer on a girl and what colour eyes?

2007-07-29 23:38:32 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Beauty & Style

I have used ant killer on the ones that I see but then more keep turning up. The problems getting so bad that the birds are flying down to eat them. If I block the holes in the wall (they are just below the windowframe) will they find other ways out, I don't want them to start coming from the walls on the inside. Any suggestions ?

2007-07-29 23:37:51 · 14 answers · asked by ANDY T 3 in Garden & Landscape

2007-07-29 23:37:49 · 3 answers · asked by kick it 5 in Community Service

2007-07-29 23:37:05 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Cricket

2007-07-29 23:36:40 · 3 answers · asked by CPUcate 6 in Mathematics

Let me tell first I'm a liberal Indian (Hindu) not anti-Jew!
After reading Anne Frank's diary and watching poignant tales on TV movies, I felt very sorry for the Holocaust survivors and wanted to share my feelings with my grandpa, who's a historian (not that famous) working on the Indus civilization.
I received a shock when he said he believed the whole Holocaust thing is a bluff created by Jews. We debated and argued a lot on it since I'd seen photos and videos showing the suffering of the Jews and could not believe him!
I also said that the Jews, being largely outnumbered by Christians couldn't have staged the whole thing, but the old man didn't change his opinion. Instead he said I was sympathising with Jews who according to him are the richest people because of their cunning tendency.(like John D. Rockefeller)
He too argued back that if Holocaust was true, why would its denial amount to jail in some European countries? Why no freedom of speech?

2007-07-29 23:36:22 · 17 answers · asked by *Felicia* 4 in History

2007-07-29 23:36:14 · 11 answers · asked by louise d 6 in Polls & Surveys

I've been chosen to go to spain with the school, but when i am in the sun, or verry hot temperatures all day, then i begin to get heat/sun stroke. i dont want it to spoil my holiday seeing as im going to be out all day, and into the night time aswell. is there any medication i could get to either avoid this, help this. if not what medication would be good to take when i suffer from it i.e paracetamol

2007-07-29 23:36:11 · 2 answers · asked by ♥ Becky ♥ 2 in Other - General Health Care

2007-07-29 23:35:40 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-07-29 23:35:33 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Optical

For instance, someone is very rude and demanding so miraculously their products take much longer to find? Or you tell them that you are out of what they need when you aren't?
My friend did this to some customers who were very arrogant and I have to admit it was funny to watch, they never figured out what they did cost them good service either.

2007-07-29 23:35:32 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-07-29 23:35:25 · 10 answers · asked by <<<єη¢hαητiηg ¢hασs> 1 in Polls & Surveys

2007-07-29 23:34:50 · 7 answers · asked by <<<єη¢hαητiηg ¢hασs> 1 in Polls & Surveys

2007-07-29 23:34:27 · 4 answers · asked by <<<єη¢hαητiηg ¢hασs> 1 in Polls & Surveys

2007-07-29 23:34:22 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Careers & Employment

2007-07-29 23:33:55 · 17 answers · asked by <<<єη¢hαητiηg ¢hασs> 1 in Polls & Surveys

My uncle wants to do this so he could watch what is happening in his home while he is away....

2007-07-29 23:33:52 · 3 answers · asked by magnifico 2 in Computer Networking

2007-07-29 23:33:11 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Careers & Employment

Yes, in History there is one instance of a trading company conquering a huge country. Can anyone spot this country? Does it mean that something was miserably wrong with the people of that country at that time?

2007-07-29 23:33:04 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in History

No religious explanations please

2007-07-29 23:33:03 · 6 answers · asked by ikaneng m 1 in Earth Sciences & Geology

i'm chinese, i have a nickname in chinese language, it will be "little 2nd" or "little 2" if transfer it to english, because i'm the 2nd son of my parents.
so i want choose "little 2nd" as my english nickname, do you think it's ok? i'm afraid if there is any bad of funny meaning of this nickname? because i don't know english language and culture very well. thank you.

2007-07-29 23:33:02 · 5 answers · asked by coner_in 1 in Languages

Keep having this dream where my teeth shatter in my mouth. Very disturbing. Wat does it mean?

2007-07-29 23:32:49 · 19 answers · asked by namz 1 in Dream Interpretation

2007-07-29 23:31:10 · 2 answers · asked by ? 2 in Home Theater