All categories - 1 April 2007

Customer: Waiter! Waiter: Yes Customer: There's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Are you using a a spoon? Customer: YES!!! Waiter: Try using a fork. Customer: A fork. Waiter: Yes, a fork. Customer: That won't work either. Waiter: Are you sure your soup is compatible with the bowl, what kind of bowl are you using? Customer: A SOUP BOWL!!! Waiter: Try updating it to the soup of the day. Customer this is the soup of the day. Waiter: Try updating to the latest soup of the day. Customer You have more than one soup of the day. Waiter: Yes, every hour, the latest soup of the day is chouder. Customer: OK, I'll update to chouder. 30 minutes later... Waiter: Here is your soup. Customer:This is potato soup. Waiter: Well...Uh...we didn't have a compatible bowl. Customer:Just give me my BILL, and I'll go buy some iSoup for $50. bill tomato soup: $10 Upgrade to soup of the day $20 : iSoup $50.

2007-04-01 07:03:08 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-04-01 07:02:50 · 6 answers · asked by "leesh" 1 in Languages

2007-04-01 07:02:12 · 4 answers · asked by Joey D 1 in Dodge

My son, a Junior in High School has very good grades but is failing Spanish. I hate to see it effect his GPA and would like to help him, but I don't know the language. What I am looking for is someone to tell me (someone his age or a parent who has gone through this) HOW can I help him. (He tells me, no tutor) I don't want to ground him, punish him, I just want him to succeed. He's a great teen and will be a wonderful adult. Please help me.

2007-04-01 07:02:12 · 4 answers · asked by Barbara 5 in Primary & Secondary Education

I'm not talking about replacing my tire with the spare,

I have the rim off, and The tire off of the rim, and the new tire on the rim, but I can't get it to seal enough so I can fill it up with air.

Right now I can't get the rubber flush with the metal so the air will stay in. The air just flows out gaps when I try to pump it up.

2007-04-01 07:01:24 · 7 answers · asked by JoeIQ 4 in Maintenance & Repairs

By the way, I agree about the illegality of Nazi symbols.
But Christians has produced more suffering to humanity that can not be even comparable.
Starting from the crusades, the annihilation of American Indians (Incas, Aztec, Mayan, American tribes) the tortures by the Inquisition etc... And the cross should not be illegal?

2007-04-01 07:01:07 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Religion & Spirituality

....when you ride "ROLLER COASTERS?" I TOTALLY AM!!!!!!
(....and get your mind outta the gutter!!!! LOL!) =)

2007-04-01 07:01:06 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Or should we wait for him to leave in disgrace in 2009?

2007-04-01 07:00:50 · 24 answers · asked by Jason 4 in Politics

I know dónde vives means where do I live. But how do I answer in spanish?

2007-04-01 07:00:41 · 3 answers · asked by jewell103 1 in Languages

Shouldn't Marion Barber be starting over Julius Jones, he plays more games in a season than Julius does anyways, considering JJ is ALWAYS HURT.... Marion runs better in the Dallas system anyways... He is power, speed, and agility... JJ is nothing but halfway decent speed and a messed up body... What do you think? Marion Barber or Julius Jones?

2007-04-01 07:00:25 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Football (American)

What do you mean today's our anniversary?


Can we not talk to each other tonight? I'd rather just watch TV.


Ohh, this diamond ring is way too big!!


And for our honeymoon we're going fishing in Alaska!


Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how to get there.


Is that phone for me? Tell 'em I'm not here.


I don't care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer dress.

2007-04-01 07:00:19 · 14 answers · asked by beastman the CEO and president of CRAZY 1 in Other - Beauty & Style

I took a pregancy test on Friday, my period is due today and hasn't come. When I took the test, my boyfriend did it for me, and he stuck the test in his pocket. The test showed up negative, and we broke it open to see if some of the dye got held back or something, and it looked like the vertical (positive) line was there but never moved- should we count the negative or retake one?

2007-04-01 06:59:59 · 7 answers · asked by ? 3 in Pregnancy

PROFESSIONAL ADVICE IS HIGHLY APPRECIATED... I realize that being seated at my desk for 3-4 hours isn't good but at my age is this normal? 35 and otherwise healthy. Not on any medications and my diet is very sodium restrictive and high in fiber. I admit that I don't drink much water perhaps 3 glasses of fluid a day. Could that be it? or is renal insufficiency possible at this age? I don't drink alcohol - perhaps a glass of wine or two bi-monthly. I do smoke about 1/2 pack of cigarettes a day... could that be causing vascular deterioration at this age? I have smoked since I was 20 so my pack history is 7.5 years. I've started to do ankle circles but so far no real notable change... HELP? Any professional advice is appreciated....

2007-04-01 06:59:52 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Heart Diseases

I'm shopping online for an inexpensive table saw. Some of them say, "dado capacity 1/2 inch." Others don't mention a dado blade, but they usually say something like, "arbor size 5/8 inch." If it has an arbor (blade opening?) size listed, does that mean that I will be able to put a dado blade in it?

2007-04-01 06:59:12 · 8 answers · asked by ? 6 in Maintenance & Repairs

Lets see how low people are...

2007-04-01 06:59:11 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

please help me.

2007-04-01 06:59:08 · 5 answers · asked by Jackie <3 1 in Mathematics

I have a 6 page paper on hate crimes against gay men and lesbians. I have no idea what kind of format to write it in, I can't even come up with an outline! I don't know what to do! I have info on hate crimes but I don't know what to make the paragraphs about and put them together in some sort of a logical sequence. Any help is GREATLY appreciated! It is a research paper so it has to be cited and everything, I already have the info.

2007-04-01 06:59:08 · 7 answers · asked by esro 2 in Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender

2007-04-01 06:58:55 · 18 answers · asked by Vibhor 1 in Cricket

Any estimates on how much a repair would cost? I have a 98 Kia.

2007-04-01 06:58:54 · 6 answers · asked by bigkad2002 1 in Maintenance & Repairs

Can anybody please explain to me what adding and decreasing wedge to a race car does? Which tightens a "loose" car?

2007-04-01 06:58:52 · 13 answers · asked by Loki 3 in NASCAR

WHY!!!!????!!!!????!!!!

2007-04-01 06:58:51 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Parenting

2007-04-01 06:58:30 · 5 answers · asked by Jackel 1 in Non-Alcoholic Drinks

Sometimes i awoke up in the dark of night
And in my mind,there is a pic of YOU .
I know someday this dream will come alive .
So 4 now , Ur shadow will do .
I have never seen ur face but i know you are in my HEART.
May be someday some place, i "ll hold u in my arms.
I will safely Keep my memory untill u come 2 me

2007-04-01 06:58:28 · 11 answers · asked by ||| Romeo Boy ||| 4 in Polls & Surveys

I no in some countries u can get a caeserian if u want 1.is it possible here in the UK?

2007-04-01 06:58:23 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy

The battery is completely dead, no lights, can't even get into the trunk, only the driver side door will unlock with a key. Is there anyway I can get into the trunk now where I have jumper cables?

2007-04-01 06:58:11 · 5 answers · asked by CAT LADY LOO 4 in Audi

We never had a woman president before, so who knows... maybe it could help us out...?

2007-04-01 06:57:33 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics

to do what he deeply and whole-heartedly felt was "God's will," and when he died, discovered he was quite wrong in his actions (in god's eyes) would god
A.) Accept him because he did his very best to follow god
or
B.) Send him to hell/purgatory/reincarnation for living a life that was in fact, against what god wants.


Sorry to be so long in my question; I am just curious.
And I suppose to answer the question you will have to pretend you do not know god's exact will.

2007-04-01 06:57:31 · 15 answers · asked by Squirtle 6 in Religion & Spirituality

I used to be able to squeeze through the railings on my back fence, so I didn't have to walk the long way round

2007-04-01 06:57:23 · 11 answers · asked by sarahmoose2000 5 in Polls & Surveys

beside..reading, giving out questions, online presentation.

2007-04-01 06:57:07 · 4 answers · asked by la_ r 1 in Primary & Secondary Education

2007-04-01 06:56:46 · 15 answers · asked by NONAME 4 in Religion & Spirituality