I haven't talked to a girl I missed for 11 months. We were only friends for four months but I really liked her and eventually fell in love with her. Last week I tried to talk to her for the 1st and last time, for if she still didn't want to talk to me anymore. She didn't as she completely ignored me. Five days later-yesterday-a teacher pulled me out of class and took me to an admin(istrator)'s office, explaining that the girl went to her about me that day and told me to please leave her alone. She told me the girl's mom called the school about me. The teacher said "It's not that she doesn't like you, it's that she doesn't like you in that way." If it's not that she doesn't like me, then why was I called out of class behind her and I didn't even do anything to be called out of class for, I used to feel. I couldn't understand why the girl couldn't stand me and/or why she just didn't want to talk to me, or why she told a teacher on me as if I was constantly calling her (I've called once then hung up out of fear) or bothering her.
I was telling the guidance counselor how I felt today, and the admin who went in there who was in the office with me yesterday said the girl wasn't trying to get me in trouble, she just cares about me to not want to hurt my feelings and that's why she had a teacher intervene. Even though I think her ignoring me hurt a lot. I wonder if even though I told her I just want to be friends again (which is all I want because I know she'll never like me) if she could still tell that I still love her. I wonder if she felt that if we were friends, that I would always want more than she could ever give because she just didn't feel the same. I wonder if she felt that by being friends with me and not returning my exact feelings for her, she was hurting me more than just flat-out not wanting to talk to me. The admin said that she does care about me, I guess even if it doesn't seem that way by her ignoring me. I just really care about her, probably more so then some of her friends who didn't realize today is her birthday like I do. I'm just never going to try to talk to her again even though I may never see her again. I feel like she's so close yet so far away. I'm 17 and she's 17 (as of today). I didn't say a word to her today though, and I feel kind of guilty.
However, my friends and parents think that she WAS purposely trying to get me into trouble and that if she cared we'd still be friends. I guess I may never know. I remember defending her to people telling me she's nothing special. Either way, it's because she's special to me that I love her, and it's because I love her that I'm 100% willing to let her go.
2007-03-28
15:25:15
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2 answers
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asked by
Icebox -0: Never Again
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Singles & Dating