It's called 'Drowning.' Any comments would be appreciated, thanks. Esp constructive ones.
We watched from the edge of the water,
And when it got too deep, we swam.
Marble waves tossed us, fragile,
But still we could not waver, not look away for a second.
Set in the concrete spell of it all.
Yellows turned to reds turned to blues.
Soon blackness was a second eyelid to us both.
Scooping over the once distinct waters.
I said, maybe, mate, maybe we should get back.
But the inky waves did not answer me.
I clawed to shore, and
it was suddenly thick as scrambled eggs,
handfuls of sea slipping and sloshing,
filling up my clothes, heavy.
Far off, you screamed something.
Something important.
I was young and
I couldn’t find you in the layers of black.
I wasn’t to know and
I did not understand that time mattered.
And the moon was still up there, watching us.
2006-11-14
09:23:19
·
4 answers
·
asked by
lady_s_hazy
3