Please read these writings and tell me how they sound. Are they uninteresting, does it drag on, is it hard to understand, is it undeveloped, would you read the rest of the novel? Please tell me how it could be better ect… THANK YOU
…….The sun rose with the hint of blood from the broken night. The pieces of the hours prior were lost in the uneasy mist of the morning wind. Nevertheless the people below this first light would remember the past moment every day of there life. They will wait on the hope that maybe the lives of their children would arise once more from the bloodied soil that was once the blocks to their home.
And-
…..The leaves taped around the floor as though mournful dancers flowing movement over movement around the trees. There doleful dance was filled with freedom and beauty. But the steel bars that caged the girl into her cell kept her from the full breeze of this comfort. It left her with a feeling of emptiness.
And-
…..He reached for the pillar above his head, swinging himself from the ground to the roof. He struggled as he reached for the patches of hay and slowly pulled himself to the top making sure his feet were locked onto the beams. A knock came from below him.” Please don’t answer he whimpered.”
2006-12-07
05:39:09
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