How To Shower Like a Woman:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see
husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental
note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth,
long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43
added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner
enhanced with real passion fruit.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10
minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake
body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower and stand on bath mat.
Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom
wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed
areas.
How To Shower Like a Man:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making
the woo-woo' sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ***.
Get in the shower Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them
off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding
area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on
the soap.
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bath mat.
Dry off forearms and butt only.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging
out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again. Shake it to watch
water fly off.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan
on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and
make the woo-woo' sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the
truth behind this, there is something so very wrong with
you.
2007-08-12
12:20:30
·
5 answers
·
asked by
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