Anger , hurt and resentment were all I could feel as walked down the dim lighted hallway in my dorm room apartment. So much animosity was swirling inside of me . It began to swell in my chest and I could feel it began to burn in the pit of my stomach., but I refuse to let the tears fall until I was safely in my room. I couldn’t believe how easy It was to be betrayed by someone you trusted in a matter of hours. What hurt even more was the fact that my roommate was completely oblivious to what she had done. What could I do? Should I confront her? I thought. Though confront her seemed like the best way to go, I strongly began to fear that I would say something that I would eventually end up regretting.
“I trust you,” I remember saying, “I wouldnt be telling you any of this if I didn’t”.
“I know”, she replied . “ Im glad that you trust me , if you can’t even trust your own roommate who else can you trust?”, she then added. I looked at her , thankful that she was my friend. I had just revealed a secret to her that at times I had trouble even admitting to myself, and at that moment it felt liberating to finally have it all out there in the open. Who would have known she’d make me regret every moment of it.
I found it amazing that someone could both surprise and disappoint you at the same time.
I totally expected her to keep what I said to her just between us ,never to be mentioned again. I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. What I didn’t expect was for the my other roommate to ambush me out of nowhere. “So, what ? You don’t trust me or something”, she asked very adamantly. I stood there completely surprised by her question and even more surprised by the tone of her voice. “ what are you talking about?” I asked. “ I’ve known you for how many years and this is what you do to me.” “Why haven’t you let me in on this secret?” At that moment I felt as if I had been slapped in the face. I couldn’t believe that this was happening to me ! I stood there with my mouth hanging open, my mind in a million places. I tried to calm myself down, I tried taking a deep breath and counting to three.
2007-04-04
15:37:05
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carmenclassof06
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