Entertainment & Music - 18 January 2007

You are a visitor in an insane asylum and you are being given the tour by the medical team.
After viewing the wards, the kitchen and various other facilities, you are taken to a bathroom.
There's a bath in there and it's filled with water.
Beside the bath are 3 items, a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket.
You enquire as to the purpose of this.
You are told it is the final test to determine whether an inmate can be released or not, the correct answer and you're free.
Incorrect and it's back to the padded cell, the straightjackets, the electric shocks and all the other good things about being crazy.
And the question is, and remember, there's a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket there but just how will you empty the water out of the bath?

2007-01-18 22:46:59 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-01-18 22:45:22 · 11 answers · asked by impasse 2 in Jokes & Riddles

I am obsessed with it.

2007-01-18 22:45:15 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Channel 4 and production firm Endemol will pay cops to escort her out of the house - to protect her from furious crowds.

TV bosses will whisk the mum of two - flanked by police outriders - to a secure location for a WEEK.

She will also be given 24-hour personal security after causing worldwide outrage with four-letter tirades at Shilpz.

She started it so by giving her all this protecting are they saying she is in the right?

2007-01-18 22:44:41 · 17 answers · asked by Puma 4 in Television

2007-01-18 22:44:26 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-01-18 22:44:03 · 14 answers · asked by ANDREW P 1 in Celebrities

For Early June.

2007-01-18 22:43:48 · 17 answers · asked by Two Peas 7 in Polls & Surveys

2007-01-18 22:43:05 · 2 answers · asked by darestobelieve 4 in Television

...is squirty cream a good alternative in coffee?...

2007-01-18 22:42:27 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

~THE 10 COMMANDMENTS OF MANIC-DEPRESSION~

1.Thou shalt not blame everything on chemical imbalance.
2.Thou shalt avoid high places and sharp objects when on eitherextreme of the mood spectrum.
3.Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's shiny trinkets.
4.Thou shalt not trust any shrink who writes thee up a prescriptionafter the first 15 minutes.
5.Thou shalt not beat up anyone while on a manic fit, no matter howmuch ye really want to, or how much they deserve it.
6.Thou shalt indulge in immaturity whenever the urge strikes thee. 7.Thou shalt not break stuff that does not belong to thee.
8.Thou shalt go to bed only when ye feel tired.
9.Thou shalt allow others to occasionally get a word in edgewise. 10.Thou shalt not send people crazy e-mails at odd hours of the night, and if thou does, then thou shalt take full responsibility for thine actions.

and remember,
"Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble plastic is cheap. You choose"

2007-01-18 22:42:08 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

What did you like / dislike about the movie?

2007-01-18 22:41:51 · 11 answers · asked by J C 2 in Movies

2007-01-18 22:40:57 · 15 answers · asked by lucky_boy 3 in Music

2007-01-18 22:40:32 · 2 answers · asked by elmechino 4 in Music

2007-01-18 22:39:44 · 7 answers · asked by A True Gentleman 5 in Television

would you find lyrics of (wall of shame) song by: course of nature and( fever for felava ) song by :hot action cup?
i want (need for speed hot porsuit 2 version songs) there is differencess between ordinary and game songs versions.
thank you...

2007-01-18 22:39:21 · 3 answers · asked by The Love! 1 in Music

Any quotes would be great. I'd also be extremely fascinated to hear what he had to say about any other Bond - especially Roger Moore (that'll get you top answer - I'm a Roger fan!)

2007-01-18 22:38:40 · 1 answers · asked by roskolewis 2 in Television

2007-01-18 22:38:27 · 14 answers · asked by Get away 3 in Polls & Surveys

Do you see me live?
Do you receive my thoughts?
Do YOU or don't YOU?!

2007-01-18 22:38:26 · 18 answers · asked by AxisofOddity 5 in Polls & Surveys

Now I know
That I can't make you stay
But where's your heart?

And I know
There's nothing I could say
To change that part
To change...

So many
Bright lights, they cast a shadow
But can I speak?
Well is it hard understanding
I'm incomplete
A life that's so demanding
I get so weak
A love that's so demanding
I can't speak

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home



who sang it??

2007-01-18 22:38:18 · 7 answers · asked by dd 1 in Music

The following advertisement in the Melbourne Age is reported to have
received numerous calls:

Single Black Female seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I am
a very good-looking girl who loves to play.
I love long walks in the bush, riding in your ute, hunting, camping, and
fishing trips, cosy winter nights lying by the fire.
Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the
right way and watch me respond.

I'll be at the front door when you get home from work wearing only what
nature gave me. Kiss me and I'm yours.

Call xxxxx-xxxx and ask for Daisy.

Over 5,000 men found themselves talking to the RSPCA about an eight
week-old black Labrador Retriever puppy.

Men are so easy.

2007-01-18 22:38:14 · 7 answers · asked by Sangy . 4 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-01-18 22:36:54 · 20 answers · asked by McAtterie 6 in Polls & Surveys

I went to B&Q yesterday and some old boy in an orange suit asked if i wanted decking. Luckily I got the 1st punch in so that was the end of it!!!

2007-01-18 22:36:44 · 20 answers · asked by splandastic 3 in Jokes & Riddles

or stroked it into a trance-like state where the water falls?

2007-01-18 22:36:22 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-01-18 22:36:21 · 8 answers · asked by Get away 3 in Polls & Surveys

2007-01-18 22:35:10 · 50 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink
I feel shame Then I look into the glass and think
about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes
and dreams . If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out
of work and their dreams would be shattered.

Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their
dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack Handy

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra and panties.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they
wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're
going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."
~ Stephen Wright

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk,
we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all
get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Without question, the greatest invention in the
history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the
wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does
not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To some ! it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can!
~ Dave Howell

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers.

One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm.
Here's how it went:

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not

2007-01-18 22:34:19 · 2 answers · asked by Sangy . 4 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-01-18 22:34:12 · 7 answers · asked by Get away 3 in Polls & Surveys

For me it's defently Johnny depp, but who do you think is the sexiest ?

2007-01-18 22:33:33 · 14 answers · asked by xXJohnny Depps Secret LoverXx 1 in Celebrities

by whom..please?


god..I'm posh!!

2007-01-18 22:33:33 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

Oh mighty Arkleseizure, thou gazed from high above. And sneezed from out thy nostrils, a gift of bounteous love. The universe around us emerged from thy nose. Now we await with eager expectation, thy handkerchief, to bring us back to thee.
Bless you.

2007-01-18 22:33:04 · 8 answers · asked by McAtterie 6 in Polls & Surveys