Entertainment & Music - 6 January 2007

This bloke's ram dies just before lambing season. So he phones his neighbour who also is a famer and asks him how much would it cost him to buy a ram from him. He reply's 3000 pounds the bloke say's he can't afford that type of money. His neighbour say's make love to them yourself.

So the next morning the bloke take's his Landrover and put 6 sheep into it and drives off to a place were he makes love to them and he then returns to the farmhouse.

The following morning he looks out the farmhouse window and the sheep are still standing and not lying on the belly's a pregnant sheep do.

So once again 6 sheep go into the Landrover for a seeing to?

The next morning his wife is getting up and he asks her to look out the window as he's knackered. His wife looks out and reply's there not standing up or on their belly's?

What are they up to said the bloke.

Oh there sheep jumping into the Landrover and one is tooting the horn!

2007-01-06 23:27:30 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Or is it more normal to send in pre-master mixes?

2007-01-06 23:26:58 · 4 answers · asked by spindoctor 2 in Music

Stevie Wonder is playing his first gig in Tokyo and the place is absolutely packed to the rafters.
In a bid to break the ice with his new audience he asks if anyone would like him to play a request.
A little old Japanese man jumps out of his seat in the first row and shouts at the top of his voice "Play a Jazz chord ! Play a jazz chord!".
Amazed that this guy knows about the jazz influences in Stevie's varied career, the blind impresario starts to play an E minor scale and then
goes into a difficult jazz melody for about 10 minutes.
When he finishes the whole place goes wild. The little old man jumps up again and shouts "No, no, play a Jazz chord, play a Jazz chord". A bit
pissed off by this, Stevie, being the professional that he is, dives straight into a jazz improvisation with his band around the B flat minor
chord and really tears the place apart. The crowd goes wild with this impromptu show of his technical expertise.
The little old man jumps up again.
"No, no. Play a Jazz chord, play a jazz chord". Well and truly p’d off that this little guy doesn't seem to appreciate his playing ability
Stevie says to him from the stage "OK smart ***. You get up here and do it!"
The little old man climbs up onto the stage, takes hold of the mike... and starts to sing .....
"A jazz chord to say I ruv you..."

2007-01-06 23:26:50 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

2007-01-06 23:26:44 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-01-06 23:26:23 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

All we can remember is the punchline; "The man came home and found a person dead outside his front door. He opened the front door and said to his bird WHO WAS THAT MAN? The bird answered; IT WAS DA PLUMBER!" Any takers?

2007-01-06 23:25:59 · 4 answers · asked by Wendy 5 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-01-06 23:25:50 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

4 men were captured and buried up to their necks in the sand. They're placed in this order A, B, C wall D. There's a wall placed between C and D. They were all buried facing only 1 direction, so each can only see the person in front. Their captors put on each of their heads a skull cap, A, B, C and D were told that on their heads is either a white or black cap (there are 2 white caps and 2 black caps).

These men were told that anyone who got the correct cap colour on their heads, they will all be set free. So question is, which of them will get it right, A, B, C or D.
(Hint: Definitely not D as he can't see anything but the horizon, and the answer is logical)

First person getting it right gets 10 points =)

2007-01-06 23:25:31 · 11 answers · asked by sugarscamp 5 in Jokes & Riddles

in America???

2007-01-06 23:25:20 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-01-06 23:24:41 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Would you like to be friends with an indonesian person?

2007-01-06 23:23:41 · 4 answers · asked by Shopaholic Pwincess 3 in Celebrities

2007-01-06 23:23:06 · 8 answers · asked by jdhayman 5 in Polls & Surveys

I was born in 27th of May in 1993 sooo what will my sign be.

2007-01-06 23:22:23 · 11 answers · asked by kabir_fiona 2 in Horoscopes

It doesnt matter how many bottles of wine I drink on a saturday night I always wake up thirsty, surely 4 bottles is enough to quench anybodys thirst??

2007-01-06 23:22:13 · 13 answers · asked by ♥Tallulah♥ 4 in Polls & Surveys

Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a want ad for an accountant. Now he was being interviewed by a highly agitated, arrogant little man who ran a small business that he had started from scratch.

"I need someone with an accounting degree," the man said. "But mainly, I'm looking for someone to do my worrying for me."

"How's that?" the would be accountant asked.

"I worry about a lot of things," the man said. "But I don't want to have to worry about money. Your job will be to take all the money worries off my back."

"I see," the accountant said. "And how much will my position pay?"

"I'll start you at eighty five thousand," responded the owner decisively.

"Eighty five thousand dollars!" the accountant exclaimed. "How can such a small business afford a sum like that?"

"That," the owner said, "is your first worry. Now get to fuckin' work!"

2007-01-06 23:21:20 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Would you stay up with my kid so I could go saw logs with the hubby?

2007-01-06 23:19:06 · 27 answers · asked by Jennifer F 6 in Polls & Surveys

In recent photos we have seen Angelina Jolie's adopted children missing fingers and I am reliably informed they are missing toes as well (of course we won't be able to confirm this unless they wear sandals).

The rumour mill is saying that the Hollywood A-lister is seeking to adopt children from around the world so she can taste human meat from every continent. Can anyone confirm this? If it is true, how does she get away with it? Once again, it looks like one rule for Movie stars and one rule for everyone else!

2007-01-06 23:18:25 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Celebrities

Mine is probably James Morrison's "You Give Me Something" or "Build Me Up Buttercup"! They're fab! :)

2007-01-06 23:18:10 · 30 answers · asked by Little Miss Helellena 3 in Music

2007-01-06 23:16:29 · 8 answers · asked by JaCk SpArOw FaN 1 in Movies

Whats the best brand for an electric fender and Italia guitar?

2007-01-06 23:15:58 · 12 answers · asked by Enzo 2 in Music

A man and a woman were on a nude beach when a wasp flew into the woman's vagina. In a rush the guy pulled on his shorts, wrapped a towel around the woman, and ran to the hospital.

When they got there the doctor said, "The only way I can think to get the wasp out is to slather some honey on my penis and lure it out."

The doctor then offered his services for a mere $50. After a long pause, the couple agreed. The doctor happily slathered on some honey and went in. After a couple of thrusts the husband said, "Hey, what the hell is going on?"

The doctor says, "Change of plans -- I'm going to drown the bastard."

2007-01-06 23:13:48 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

of your year at school.....

A (****) at our school was the toughest guy of the year and we used to have a (****) of the whole school...

**** been the term used for somebody who knew how to take care of themselves that nobody would dare pick on ie: the toughest hardest person

2007-01-06 23:13:25 · 17 answers · asked by . 6 in Polls & Surveys

2007-01-06 23:13:20 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Television

what is ur favorite song they do?

2007-01-06 23:13:06 · 13 answers · asked by shelbo. 2 in Music

2007-01-06 23:12:38 · 30 answers · asked by Jennifer F 6 in Polls & Surveys

2007-01-06 23:12:20 · 1 answers · asked by Curious 1 in Celebrities

It has to start with Ms....can you help me? If you don't know what a Gypsy Queen is, here is their myspace~

http://www.myspace.com/scorpiontattoochick

this is my myspce, to kinda see who I am~

http://www.myspace.com/courtneylynnbauer

2007-01-06 23:12:11 · 2 answers · asked by Courtney 3 in Polls & Surveys

Was having this debate with friends just last night

2007-01-06 23:11:09 · 35 answers · asked by Sarah P 1 in Television

a riddle

2007-01-06 23:10:45 · 11 answers · asked by subby 1 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-01-06 23:10:45 · 9 answers · asked by DefenderOfTheMeek22 4 in Polls & Surveys