Entertainment & Music - 4 December 2006

1. Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

2. Aren't you the guy from the villiage people?

3. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job.

4. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.

5. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

6. You're not going to check the trunk, are you?

7. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on cops?

8. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?

9. I pay your salary

10. So uh, you on the take or what?

11. Gee officer, that's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning.

12. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

13. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of me.

14. Officer, could you hold my beer so I can get my lisence out.

2006-12-04 06:31:58 · 17 answers · asked by eeyoree rocks2003 7 in Jokes & Riddles

i'm looking for a lyric for the song, can u feel it by bob sinclair?

2006-12-04 06:31:47 · 3 answers · asked by ceg2581 4 in Music

2006-12-04 06:31:26 · 11 answers · asked by clara m 1 in Celebrities

Do you guys like Greys Anatomy ??? If you do who is your favorite character and why ??? what was the saddest episode ??? what was the best episode ???

2006-12-04 06:31:09 · 10 answers · asked by talkative_57 2 in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-04 06:31:08 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

A blonde walks into a bar and goes straight into the toilets. She comes out and starts flirting with the barman. First she runs her hand's down his shirt, then she gently caresses his hair and beard, then she puts two of her fingers in the barman's mouth to suck.
She then walks out of the bar and calls back
"pass on a message to the manager, the ladies is out of toilet roll"

2006-12-04 06:30:34 · 17 answers · asked by Rubber * Duckie 4 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-12-04 06:30:24 · 2 answers · asked by MAINEMONEY H 1 in Music

Walking through the woods a man comes up to another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly against the tree. Seeing this he inquires, "Just out of curiosity, what are you doing?"

"I'm listening to the music of the tree."

"You gotta be kiddin' me."

"No, would you like to give it a try?"

"Well, OK..." So he wraps his arms around the tree and presses his ear up against the tree. With this the other guy slaps a set of handcuffs on him, takes his wallet, jewelry, car keys, then strips him naked and leaves.

Two hours later another nature lover strolls by, sees this guy handcuffed to the tree, stark naked, and asks, "What happened to you?"

He tells the guy the whole story about how he got there. While he was telling his story, the other guy shakes his head in sympathy, walks around behind him, kisses him behind the ear and says, "This just ain't gonna be your day."

2006-12-04 06:30:06 · 18 answers · asked by mefussa 2 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-12-04 06:30:02 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-04 06:29:57 · 4 answers · asked by Hello 1 in Polls & Surveys

and what caused is to get struck by lightning and to couse it to rain, any ideas?

2006-12-04 06:29:47 · 9 answers · asked by Bruza 17/uk 3 in Television

What are all the things I can learn from my sign? Is there a website I can see all the signs and the characteristics? and lol What does the future hold? Is there anyway to know who I will be married to?

2006-12-04 06:29:38 · 17 answers · asked by ηєvєrmorє 6 in Horoscopes

2006-12-04 06:29:38 · 15 answers · asked by Atheist 4 Jesus 2 in Jokes & Riddles

MacGuyver or Chuck Norris?

2006-12-04 06:29:21 · 18 answers · asked by Masta Batang Dollar Billz 5 in Polls & Surveys

or for that matter where i can learn chords?

2006-12-04 06:29:08 · 1 answers · asked by zlkxn 1 in Music

for me it has to be its a wonderful life.
are you reading this dear relatives big kisses to you.
sorry that was a huge hint to my kids and hubby, but really what film or song really makes christmas for you?

2006-12-04 06:28:51 · 20 answers · asked by cheekkkychik 2 in Movies

2006-12-04 06:28:49 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead and one's a blonde.

The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says no and the executioner shouts, ''Ready! Aim!'' Suddenly the brunette yells, ''EARTHQUAKE!!!'' Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.

The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no and the executioner shouts, ''Ready! Aim!'' Suddenly the redhead yells, ''TORNADO!!!'' Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.

By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, Ready! Aim!'' and the blonde yells, ''FIRE!!!'''

2006-12-04 06:28:20 · 10 answers · asked by Cowboy 4 in Jokes & Riddles

♥

2006-12-04 06:28:11 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-04 06:27:28 · 29 answers · asked by DENNIS 3 in Polls & Surveys

does anyone know of any films which have psychopaths in them (you need to have remembered the word psychopath being mentioned somewhere in the film tho please).

Also any films which have psychological profilers in them (ie ppl who say they know the characteristics and background of psychopaths). i have 'along came a spider' and 'silence of the lambs'.

Am trying to write an introduction to an essay...about psychopths.
Thanks

2006-12-04 06:26:49 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

The ambitious coach of a girls track team gives the squad steroids. The team's performance soars. They win the county and state championship until one day they are favored to win nationals easily. Penelope, a sixteen-year-old hurdler visits her coach and says,

"Coach, I have a problem. Hair is starting to grow on my chest."

"What!" the coach says in a panic, "How far down does it go?"

She replies, "Down to my balls. That's something else I want to talk to you about."

2006-12-04 06:26:45 · 15 answers · asked by ploppy pants 3 in Jokes & Riddles

traditional
contemporary
Old fashion
Other

2006-12-04 06:26:36 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-04 06:26:24 · 13 answers · asked by holmegirl 3 in Polls & Surveys

No, neither has he!

2006-12-04 06:25:32 · 15 answers · asked by First Ascent 4 Thistle 7 in Jokes & Riddles

I know this is old but it still makes me laugh..

Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat!"

Little Johnny replied. "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

The man asked, "Well sonny, did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"

Little Johnny answered, "No, he minded his own f*cking business!"

2006-12-04 06:25:15 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2006-12-04 06:24:58 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

A man is out drinking all night and finally comes home, three sheets to the wind, holding a sheep under his arm. He can't even let himself in, so he starts pounding on the door. His wife, very furious at him, answers the door and demands to know where he's been all night.

The drunk man says, "I just wanted you to see the pig that I've been sleeping with!"

His wife says, "You idiot, you're so drunk that you don't even know that thats a sheep"

The man says "I was talking to the sheep!"

2006-12-04 06:24:56 · 4 answers · asked by thuglife 5 in Jokes & Riddles

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-*** guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

2006-12-04 06:24:09 · 13 answers · asked by Cowboy 4 in Jokes & Riddles

Are you embarrassed about some of the questions you asked when you first started using Yahoo Answers, not knowing they will always be in your Answers History?

2006-12-04 06:24:00 · 16 answers · asked by My Other Identity 1 in Polls & Surveys