Entertainment & Music - 16 October 2007

The phone rings
The baby cries
The tap is dripping
The doorbell rings

2007-10-16 22:28:49 · 34 answers · asked by Mad Irish Momma 4 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-16 22:28:12 · 18 answers · asked by mao ying 3 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-16 22:27:52 · 25 answers · asked by wolflady 6 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-16 22:26:48 · 24 answers · asked by      7 in Polls & Surveys

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?"

She calls on little Johnny. He replies, "None, they all fly away with the first gun shot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."

Then Little Johnny says "I have a question for YOU. There are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone"

To which Little Johnny replied, "The correct answer is the one with the wedding ring on......... but I like your thinking."

2007-10-16 22:24:35 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-10-16 22:24:13 · 21 answers · asked by The Unknown Soldier 6 in Polls & Surveys

get suspended???? :-( eg: Martha B, Novella, Bekz, Zaddi

2007-10-16 22:24:06 · 16 answers · asked by ßỰŦŤΣЯ§! Guess who's back...for now! 6 in Polls & Surveys

Man : "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

Man : "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized !"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy."
Woman: "You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?"

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."

Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?"

2007-10-16 22:23:01 · 18 answers · asked by Sparky 5 in Jokes & Riddles

A man and a woman are sitting next to each other in first class on a plane. The woman sneezes, then takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs.

The man isn't sure he saw what she did, and decides he is probably hallucinating.

A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs.

The man is about to go nuts. He can't believe that he's seeing what he's seeing.

A few more minutes pass. The woman sneezes yet again. She takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs yet again.

The man has finally had all he can handle.

He turns to the woman and says, "Three times you've sneezed, and three times you've taken a tissue and wiped it between your legs! What kind of signals are you sending me, or are you just trying to drive me crazy?"

The woman replies, "I am sorry to have disturbed you, sir. I have a rare condition such that when I sneeze, I have an orgasm."

The man, now feeling bad, says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What are you taking for it?"

The woman looks at him and says, "Pepper

2007-10-16 22:21:58 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-10-16 22:20:36 · 16 answers · asked by ele 5 in Polls & Surveys

The Alabama preacher said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask Forgiveness from God and this Christian family."

No one moved.

The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression."

Again all was quiet.

Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop taffic rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered a she spoke, "Reverend there has been a terrible has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets."

2007-10-16 22:19:31 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Good Communication Skills - Spends lots of time on phone

Average Employee - Not too bright

Exceptionally Well Qualified - Made no major blunders yet

Work Is First Priority - Too ugly to get a date

Active Socially - Drinks a lot

Family Is Active Socially - Spouse drinks, too

Independent Worker - Nobody knows what he/she does

Quick Thinking - Offers plausible excuses

Careful Thinker - Won't make a decision

Aggressive - Obnoxious

Uses Logic On Difficult Jobs - Gets someone else to do it

Expresses Themselves Well - Speaks English

Meticulous Attention To Detail - A nit picker

Has Leadership Qualities - Is tall or has a loud voice

Exceptionally Good Judgment - Lucky

Keen Sense Of Humor - Knows a lot of dirty jokes

Career Minded - Back Stabber

Loyal - Can't get a job anywhere else

2007-10-16 22:16:15 · 20 answers · asked by Sparky 5 in Jokes & Riddles

are you happy with your weight?

2007-10-16 22:15:51 · 30 answers · asked by mojo569 4 in Polls & Surveys

If so how many years is it? How, why where and when?

2007-10-16 22:15:28 · 7 answers · asked by acendedindividual 3 in Other - Music

to howl when you see a full moon ??

I feel like l'm going to turn into a werewolf...

2007-10-16 22:14:49 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house and, after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one says: "Last night we went out to a new restaurant, and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly."

The other man says: "What's the name of the restaurant?" The first man knits his brow in obvious concentration, and finally says to his companion: "Aahh, what is the name of that red flower you give to someone you love?"

His friend replies: "A carnation?" "No, no. The other one," the man says. His friend offers another suggestion: "The poppy?" "Nahhhh," growls the man.

"You know - the one that is red and has thorns." His friend says: "Do you mean a rose?" "Yes! Thank you!" the first man says. He then turns toward the kitchen and yells: "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

2007-10-16 22:11:29 · 21 answers · asked by Sparky 5 in Jokes & Riddles

my surname's wagner.

2007-10-16 22:10:25 · 19 answers · asked by Da PiMp KiD xD 1 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-16 22:10:15 · 5 answers · asked by ishkruby 2 in Polls & Surveys

between a Giraffe and a spider

2007-10-16 22:09:29 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Two days back it was alright. The player was working and I have watched movies. But now it is not working. What would be the reason?

2007-10-16 22:09:00 · 3 answers · asked by Raja 7 in Movies

If you dont know let me show you how
haha

2007-10-16 22:08:18 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-16 22:06:45 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-16 22:06:14 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

im usually at work but it my day off and just turned it on.......this fat chav has a baby and she dont know who the dad is and it could be one of 5 blokes!!!!!!!!!!!!!! come on! what kind of life does that kid have to look forward to with a mum like that and the dad is 17!!!!!! my god dont these people have any morals !!!!!!

2007-10-16 22:05:08 · 12 answers · asked by ral 4 in Talk Shows

2007-10-16 22:04:41 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

im addicted to hooka, starbucks and the tv show degrassi.. and you?

2007-10-16 22:02:32 · 29 answers · asked by I Dream of Best Answer 4 in Polls & Surveys

and it actually worked out?

2007-10-16 21:58:22 · 18 answers · asked by ßỰŦŤΣЯ§! Guess who's back...for now! 6 in Polls & Surveys

Im 12st and eat 3500-4000cal a day, how much should i eat to get to 13 stone?

2007-10-16 21:57:54 · 4 answers · asked by hello 1 in Polls & Surveys

..it's pouring here in the rainy city.. :(

2007-10-16 21:57:49 · 17 answers · asked by Basket-santa 6 in Polls & Surveys

~ feels like crumbling down on you?

(NOT happening to me but to someone I love dearly)

2007-10-16 21:55:25 · 14 answers · asked by Marinella Melinda 2 in Polls & Surveys