Entertainment & Music - 1 October 2006

1. Clean his underwear.
2. Tolerating any bad smell that is protruding from him.
3. Sex on demand.
4. Try to get along with his friends.

2006-10-01 21:42:16 · 12 answers · asked by gymfreak 2 in Polls & Surveys

I do NOT want the complete joke. (Really) Give me ONLY the puchline from the joke and let us all try to figure out the rest of the joke. This also gives you a lot more freedom as to the jokes content. Some puchlines are so funny...they almost don't even need the joke. The winner can put the whole joke in the comment section AFTER the winner is picked. (Or we can contact each other if we want to hear the whole joke.) I will start it off with the best punchline I have ever heard.

So the dad says: " Son...you may be 'living off love', but you're killing the chickens." (LOL) Let's hear yours now.

2006-10-01 21:39:42 · 7 answers · asked by Smart Dude 6 in Jokes & Riddles

I'm getting by on love and coffee. What is your poison?

2006-10-01 21:39:35 · 26 answers · asked by McAtterie 6 in Polls & Surveys

Who amongst the followind do you find the best.
Please do not give random answers.
Thank you.

2006-10-01 21:36:23 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

Yo mama is soo fat that she was mistaken as a overturned semi when she fell crossing the highway.

2006-10-01 21:34:43 · 10 answers · asked by juju_63670 2 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-10-01 21:32:36 · 16 answers · asked by jemimahardman 1 in Comics & Animation

for boy and for girl respectively

2006-10-01 21:31:59 · 16 answers · asked by kk 1 in Polls & Surveys

At the grand meeting of the jungle, animals decided to accept the rabbit as their new king. Everybody agreed to call the rabbit as ‘Rabbit the Mighty, Rabbit the King’ and be afraid of him. Next morning, the rabbit walks through the jungle and sees the fox sound asleep. He kicks the fox in the butt. Fox wakes up, looks back, and yells ….. Oh, ‘Rabbit the Mighty, Rabbit the King’ and runs into the jungle until disappear. Next, rabbit kicks bear’s butt. Bear also yells….. Oh, ‘Rabbit the Mighty, Rabbit the King’ and runs away. Next is cow’s turn. As the rabbit kicked the cow, cow looks back, sees the rabbit and kicks back so hard that the poor rabbit flies into the air and falls 25 feet away on the ground and curls in pain for several minutes. Then the rabbit stands on his feet, looks around and makes sure no one is around. Finally, the rabbit continues walking into the jungle he whispers to himself: “Damn cow! Never attends the meetings.”

2006-10-01 21:30:46 · 15 answers · asked by sea_vancouver 1 in Jokes & Riddles

PLEASE!

2006-10-01 21:29:41 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas, but there are more Catholic churches there than casinos. Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed.

Since they get chips from so many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to process these offerings. The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan Monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.

This is done by the chip monks

2006-10-01 21:29:35 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

how many word or names can you come up with that start with or have the word jack in them??? for example jack malone, jack-o-lantern, you just got jacked, jack and jill.. you can use these if u most whoever lists the most will get 10 points... have fun

2006-10-01 21:29:34 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

it makes me cry everytime I watch it
(I hope I spelled the actresses name right)

2006-10-01 21:24:35 · 6 answers · asked by Moma 7 in Polls & Surveys

The more you take ...the more you leave behind...

2006-10-01 21:19:16 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Who'd win

2006-10-01 21:17:33 · 1 answers · asked by gerbil31603 5 in Celebrities

i heard this on the radio news but not on the tv news wondered if it was true?

2006-10-01 21:15:15 · 15 answers · asked by brooke h 1 in Movies

The teacher asked the children in the Sunday School class, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would I get into Heaven?"

"NO"! the children all answered.

"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into Heaven"? Again, the answer was "NO"!

"Well," the teacher continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?" In the back of the room, a 5 year old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead 1st!"

2006-10-01 21:15:07 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

to Mike Flowers..................I miss his kick ar*e singing!!

2006-10-01 21:14:47 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

2006-10-01 21:14:12 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

I have a 97 grand am . I burned a cd on a cd-r disc and it wont play in it. It does play nicely in my 98 town and country van. Why? Would buying music cd-r discs help? Is there anything I could do to make burned cd's work in my car? Thanks

2006-10-01 21:13:31 · 5 answers · asked by garrisonjj 1 in Music

2006-10-01 21:13:08 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-10-01 21:09:51 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

2006-10-01 21:08:09 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

A vain forty year old woman decides to have a face lift & with her wallet as large as her ego, gets one of the top plastic surgeons money can buy.
She gets her face done & pays the 200 grand & the doc tells her,
“I put two screws behind each of your ears so you can tighten as needed to keep your fresh young look”

The woman is pleased but after two years have passed, she wakes up & notices bags under her eyes. She furiously storms to the surgeons’ office.
“I paid you 200 grand, what the hell are these under my eyes?!!”
The surgeon replies, “Lady, those aren’t bags under your eyes…they’re your T!TS.”

“…and if you don’t stop turning those screws, you’re going to have a beard & a double chin!”

2006-10-01 21:03:40 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

anyone knows wich is the name of a band/artist that made a very dark and acoustic cover of BeeGee's song Stayin Alive?
its no Ozzy ozbourne i've already listen that one ... i mean there is like 2 guitars one cello and some bongos .... and it sounds like if it was a Deftones version or some band of that style but i cant find it , i have like 80 gigas of music even im musician and is the only song that i've been looking for years , asking everyone , in every p2p program . etc ... but i cant find it

2006-10-01 21:02:37 · 1 answers · asked by DREMONibd 1 in Music

A rich guy in Georgia decided that he wanted to throw a party and invited all of his buddies and neighbors. He also invited Leroy, the only Black guy in the neighborhood.

He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion. Everyone was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating shrimp, oysters and BBQ and flirting with the women.

At the height of the party, the rich dude said, "I have a 10ft man-eating gator in my pool and I'll give a million dollars to anyone who has the guts to jump in."

The words were barely out of the rich dude's mouth when there was a loud splash and everyone turned around and saw Leroy in the pool!

Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its butt! Leroy was jabbing the gator in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, doing all kinds of stuff like head butts and chokeholds, biting the gator on the tail and flipping the gator through the air like some kind of Japanese Judo Instructor. The water was churning and splashing everywhere.

Both Leroy and the gator were screaming. Finally Leroy strangled the gator and let it float to the bottom like a K-mart goldfish. Leroy then slowly climbed out of the pool.

Everybody was just staring at him in disbelief.

Finally the rich guy says, "Well, Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million dollars."

"No, that's okay. I don't want it.", said Leroy.

The rich dude said, "Man, I have to give you something. You won the bet. How about half a million bucks then?"

"No thanks. I don't want it," answered Leroy.

The rich dude said, "Come on, I insist on giving you something. That was amazing. How about a new Porsche and a Rolex and some stock options?"

The Black man said, "No."

The confused rich guy said, "Well, Leroy, then what do you want?"

Leroy said, "I want the name of the man who pushed me in the pool!"

2006-10-01 21:00:33 · 6 answers · asked by Woody 3 in Jokes & Riddles

Have her stomped on by a 60ft tall Rachel Ray
Put landmines in her flower garden
dissolve her in moleculer acid
black mamba in a briefcase of money
woodchipper ever see Fargo?
Stewie's choice
one way ticket to Iran in the nude
other you name

2006-10-01 21:00:29 · 3 answers · asked by gerbil31603 5 in Celebrities

The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex.

Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact the family's status, she consulted the family doctor.

The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion.

He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.

Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the woman told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms.

The girl burst out laughing and reached over to hug her mother saying: "Oh Mom! You don't have to worry about that! I'm dating Susan!"

2006-10-01 20:57:35 · 5 answers · asked by Woody 3 in Jokes & Riddles

my friends and i plan to watch it after homecoming. i watched the commercials and i'm scared as heck to watch it.

2006-10-01 20:55:10 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

2006-10-01 20:54:19 · 2 answers · asked by venkat 5 in Music

I think I hear them now.....

2006-10-01 20:53:40 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys