Entertainment & Music - 26 November 2007

A guy walks into a bar and orders 12 tequilas.
The bartender asked, "what's wrong," and the guy says that he just found out that his younger son is gay. The bartender says, "he's sorry about it."
After a couple of days the guy comes back and orders 15 tequilas. The bartender asked, "What's wrong now," to which the guy responds That he found out that his older son was gay, too. The bartender says that he's sorry.
The guy returned a few days later and ordered 20 tequilas. The bartender burst out, "Isn't anyone in your family gettin' any p***y?!"
The guy gets really pissed and says, "Yeah, my wife!!!!!"

2007-11-26 23:36:02 · 23 answers · asked by BRIAN M 5 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-11-26 23:35:33 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

is there a website that you can watch harry potter and the order of the phoenix? at least half of the movie...not the traliers. Thanks for your help

2007-11-26 23:34:04 · 8 answers · asked by minx7♪♫ 3 in Movies

2007-11-26 23:33:18 · 24 answers · asked by Buddy Hodor 7 in Polls & Surveys

*groggily raises hand and sips coffee with the free hand*

2007-11-26 23:31:39 · 19 answers · asked by MamiZ-Notorious Faithful Freak 5 in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-26 23:29:35 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

and do you think those are good differences or not?

Why?

2007-11-26 23:29:11 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Peace in Yarholia for the whole month of December...
No reporting, or violations for a month.
Lets see what happens.
Everybody be good and funny and love thy neighbor.
If you don't like a question, don't answer...who's in?

2007-11-26 23:28:39 · 23 answers · asked by Leepal 5 in Polls & Surveys

1. Two peanuts were walking down a spooky road at night... One was assaulted.


2. A termite walks into a bar room and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"


3. "Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud."
"Yes sir, it's fresh ground."


4. What's brown and sticky? A stick.


5. Why was the Tomato blushing? Because he saw the salad dressing


6. Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he had no guts!


7. What did the apple say to the orange?
Nothing stupid, apples don't talk.


8. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb into a tree and act like a nut...


9. Why can't a chicken coop have more than 2 doors?
Because if it had 4 doors it would be a chicken sedan.


10. Famous last words of a mafia hitman: "Who put the violin in the violin case?"


And the winner is......

Did you hear about the dyslexic who sold his soul to Santa?

2007-11-26 23:25:49 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

A husband and wife want to take golf lessons from a pro at a local country club. The man and woman meet the pro and head onto the driving range. The man goes up to hit first. He swings and hits the ball 100 yards.
The golf pro says not bad. "Now hold the club as firm as you hold your wife's breasts". The man follows instructions and hits the ball 300 yards. The golf pro says "Excellent!"

Now the woman takes her turn. Her ball goes 30 yards. The golf pro said, "Not bad, but try holding the club like you hold your husbands d*ck." She swings and the ball goes 10 yards.
The golf pro said, "Not bad, but now try taking the club out of your mouth and then hit the ball."

2007-11-26 23:24:54 · 14 answers · asked by BRIAN M 5 in Jokes & Riddles

And why? And what is it like on your planet?

2007-11-26 23:24:50 · 7 answers · asked by ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 2 in Polls & Surveys

Thumbs up for all your answers. Love you All. Thanks.

2007-11-26 23:24:22 · 8 answers · asked by rene c 4 in Polls & Surveys

Who do you realy rate music-wise and for what reason? Some of my fave bands are Rose Tattoo, Type O Negative, AC/DC, Metallica and (early) Black Sabbath. Love the energy and bluesey feel of AC/DC and Rose Tattoo and the heavy, doomy sound of Sabbath and Type O and Metallica are (or where) a great band. But I like literally hundereds of bands and singers for different reasons. I have different music for different moods.
How about everyone else? Be as specific as you can, I like to know other peoples opinions.

2007-11-26 23:24:09 · 9 answers · asked by Witch 4 in Polls & Surveys

As a result of the reduction of money budgeted for the Department areas, we are forced to cut our number of personnel.

Under the new plan, older employees will be asked to accept early retirement, thus permitting the retention of younger people who represent our future plans.

Therefore, a program to phase out older personnel by the end of the current fiscal year, via retirement, will be placed in effect immediately. The program will be known as R.A.P.E. (Retire Aged Personnel Early).

Employees who are R.A.P.E.D. will be given the opportunity to look for other employment outside the company. Provided they are being R.A.P.E.D., they can request a review of the employment records before actual retirement takes place. This phase of the operation will be called S.C.R.E.W. (Survey of Capabilities of retired Early Workers).

All employees who have been R.A.P.E.D. or S.C.R.E.W.E.D. may file an appeal with upper management. This will be called S.H.A.F.T. (Study by Higher Authority Following Termination). Under the terms of the new policies, employees may be R.A.P.E.D. once, S.C.R.E.W.E.D. twice, but may be S.H.A.F.T.E.D. as many times as the company deems appropriate.

If any employee follows the above procedure, he or she will be entitled to get H.E.R.P.E.S. (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel's Early Severance). As H.E.R.P.E.S. is considered a benefit plan. any employee who has received H.E.R.P.E.S. will no longer be R.A.P.E.D. or S.C.R.E.W.E.D. by the company

2007-11-26 23:22:57 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

I Had A Summer Job At "Dimillo's" And I Had So Many Chicks Ask Me Out

2007-11-26 23:20:18 · 47 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Teeny and toasty?
OR
Roomy and breezy?

2007-11-26 23:20:17 · 27 answers · asked by oh geez 6 in Polls & Surveys

Mrs. Smith has three daughters who are all getting married within the same month. She tells each one of her daughters to write back about their married life. To avoid possible embarrassment to their new husbands by openly discussing their love lives, the mother and daughters agree to using newspaper advertisements as a "code" to let the mother know how their love lives are going.
The first one gets married and the second day a telegram arrives with a single message, simply: "MAXWELL COFFEE HOUSE." Mrs. Smith gets the newspaper and checks the Maxwell Coffee House advertisement, and it says: "Good to the last drop..." So, Mrs. Smith is happy.
Then the second daughter gets married. After a week, there is a postcard that reads: "ROTHMAN'S MATTRESSES." So, Mrs. Smith looks at the Rothman's Mattresses ad, and it says: "FULL SIZE, KING SIZE." And Mrs. Smith is happy.
Then it is the third one's wedding. Mrs. Smith is anxious because two weeks have passed and still no message from the third daughter. Finally, after four weeks, comes a letter with the message: "BRITISH AIRWAYS." And Mrs. Smith looks in the newspaper for the British Airways ad, but this time she faints. The ad reads: "THREE TIMES A DAY, SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, BOTH WAYS."

2007-11-26 23:20:08 · 20 answers · asked by BRIAN M 5 in Jokes & Riddles

in writing/communicating/brfriending a Child Murderer?
if so WHY??????

2007-11-26 23:18:25 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

One morning a husband took a pair of underwear out of the drawer
"What the hell?" he said to himself as a little "dust" cloud appeared when he shook them out.
"April," he hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?"
She shot back: "It's not talcum powder. It's 'Miracle Grow'

2007-11-26 23:18:01 · 13 answers · asked by BRIAN M 5 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-11-26 23:17:01 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

has joined Facebook, says his hobbies are socialising, footie, x-box, says he lives in Lincolnshire and is looking for friends! Should this be allowed?
He also has a lot of admirers that write to and visit him??

2007-11-26 23:16:17 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

A mouse was setting in a bar having a drink when a beautiful female giraffe came in and sat down at the end of the bar. The mouse looked over at her and ordered her a drink. Soon he had moved down beside her and ordered her another drink.

After a third round, the bartender looked up and they were leaving the bar together.

The next day the mouse limped into the bar, barely crawled up on the barstool and sat there gasping for air. His whiskers were bent and broken, tail was crooked and patches of hair were falling out.

The bartender took one look and said, "How did it go last night?"

The mouse said, "Man, that was the best sex I ever had."
The bartender asked, "Why do you look so bad?"

The mouse replied, "Hey between the kissing and the screwing I must have run 10 miles!"

2007-11-26 23:15:52 · 14 answers · asked by BRIAN M 5 in Jokes & Riddles

spending xmas?

Ill be spending it at home with my parent! Its the first year spending it without my sister so it will be sad!

2007-11-26 23:13:58 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-26 23:13:50 · 41 answers · asked by BLUE ROCK 1 in Polls & Surveys

how can I shop my music in a way i could get distribution rather than a record deal ?

2007-11-26 23:13:15 · 1 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Music

draw, snip, tarp... these words can be read backward as proper words can you come up with more.....

2007-11-26 23:12:53 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Yahoo : answer stupid questions for meaningless, useless points....for no reason at all!!
;-)
;-)

2007-11-26 23:12:44 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-26 23:11:46 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-26 23:11:41 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Come on take a guess ,, What do you have to loose?

2007-11-26 23:11:14 · 20 answers · asked by BLUE ROCK 1 in Polls & Surveys