Entertainment & Music - 20 October 2007

AFTER BEING MARRIED FOR 44 YEARS, JIM TOOK A CAREFUL LOOK AT HIS WIFE ONE
DAY AND SAID, "HONEY, 44 YEARS AGO WE HAD A CHEAP APARTMENT, A CHEAP
CAR, SLEPT ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHED A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV, BUT I
GOT TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT WITH A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GAL."

HE CONTINUED, "NOW I HAVE A $500,000 HOME, A $45,000 CAR, NICE BIG BED AND PLASMA
SCREEN TV, BUT I'M SLEEPING WITH A 65-YEAR-OLD WOMAN. IT SEEMS TO ME
THAT YOU'RE NOT HOLDING UP YOUR SIDE OF THINGS."

HIS WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN. SHE TOLD HIM, "GO OUT AND FIND A HOT
25-YEAR-OLD GAL, AND SHE WOULD MAKE SURE THAT I WOULD ONCE AGAIN BE
LIVING IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A CHEAP CAR, SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED
AND WATCHING A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV."

AREN'T OLDER WOMEN GREAT? THEY REALLY KNOW HOW TO SOLVE YOUR MID-LIFE
CRISES.

2007-10-20 12:50:51 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

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What do you get when you fall in love .... ????

2007-10-20 12:50:22 · 36 answers · asked by Joe 6 in Polls & Surveys

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Golf on a Desert Island?

A guy who was shipwrecked on a desert island. He'd been there for some months when, as he sat on the beach, a figure appeared in the surf.

As he watched, it turned out to be a beautiful woman in a wetsuit, walking out of the surf.

She approached him and said, "I'd bet you'd like a Cold One."

"You've got beer?" he asked, and she nodded as she unzipped a compartment in her wetsuit and pulled out a frosty can, cracked it open, and handed it to him.

"I bet you'd like a nice smoke."

"You've got cigars in there?" he asked.

She nodded and opened another zipper and pulled out an Opus X, snipped the end off, lit it for him in her sultry mouth, and handed it to him.

She stepped up close to him, and whispered, "I bet you'd like to play around...."

"You mean," he panted, "you have a set of golf clubs in there?"

2007-10-20 12:47:52 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

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Don't you think Buk could sue Yahoo for unconstitutionally depriving him his freedom of speech .?

As far as I know it used to be one of the mainstays ( and worldwide admired ) of American Democracy.
I know things have changed recently ( for security's reason ).
But still I've seen questions posed and answers given which would make the Marquis de Sade blanch.
Yet, they get away with it, Buk never does !!
Could he sue. or is Yahoo above the law !

2007-10-20 12:47:46 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

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Why do I miss you so much?

2007-10-20 12:47:44 · 42 answers · asked by BOBBY B 6 in Polls & Surveys

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Candied apples or Carmel apples......?

Which one would you like to have?

I'll have the candied.

2007-10-20 12:47:36 · 41 answers · asked by ® 7 in Polls & Surveys

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What's the last DVD you bought?

2007-10-20 12:47:13 · 15 answers · asked by Cliff 6 in Polls & Surveys

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Do you want to...?

hold hands and hug something

2007-10-20 12:46:48 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

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Are you with someone that you feel...?

you don't deserve or vice versa?

2007-10-20 12:45:14 · 14 answers · asked by ConstElation 6 in Polls & Surveys

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And The Real Winner Is...?

A fellow is getting ready to tee-off on first hole when a second fellow approaches and asks if he can join him.

The first says that he usually plays alone but agrees to let the second guy join him.

Both are even after the first couple of holes.

The second guy says "Say, we're about evenly matched, what about we play for a five a hole?"

The first fellow says that he usually plays alone and doesn't like to bet but agrees to the terms.

Well, the second guy wins the rest of the holes and as they're walking off of the eighteenth hole, and while counting his $80.00, he confesses that he's the pro at a neighboring course and likes to pick on suckers.

The first fellow reveals that he's the Parish Priest at the local Catholic Church, to which the second fellow gets all flustered and apologetic and offers to give the Priest back his money.

The Priest says, "No, no. You won fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you. You keep your winnings."

The pro says, "Well, is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

The Priest says, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation. Then, if you bring your mother and father by after Mass, I'll marry them for you."

2007-10-20 12:42:55 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

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Do you have exciting news that you would like to share? Are you looking forward to something?

My boyfriend and I will be in Atlantic City on Wednesday and Thursday. I am so excited and looking forward to it! We are going fishing both Wednesday and Thursday nights which I love! Being on the beach, especially at night, it is so relaxing. I am so happy there. We leave Friday morning to go to Baltimore Maryland where we will see Pastor Joel Osteen. I am really happy about that!

I just wanted to know if any of you are feeling this way too because of something in your near future.

2007-10-20 12:41:52 · 13 answers · asked by Missy 5 in Polls & Surveys

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Isn't funny how things work?

Ok this isn't a joke because it really happen but it is at the same time since it's on here! Ok so this is about my sister she was on crushes at the time because she had broken her leg . I was ummm. 14 and she was 18 ! And since i was younger than her she always did evil things to me . So one day we were outside on the porch and she was on the stairs sitting down and i was standing by her . We were talking and everything and she said hey ces come here i kinda knew she had a fart up her sleeve . So i didn't come . And she was like come on come on. I wanna go in help me up i cant move good with this cast on . So i said ok ree and she pull me down beside her and tried to hold me until she got her fart out and all of a sudden i jump up and looked at her and her eyes were bucked and i said ree whats wrong . she said na'll your going to laugh and i said no im not and she said ok . I helped her up and she turn around ......She had crap all over her pants LOL ! I must had fell out laughing

2007-10-20 12:41:41 · 16 answers · asked by ♥Lonelygirl4u♥ 2 in Jokes & Riddles

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