Entertainment & Music - 14 October 2006

A young couple on their wedding night were in their honeymoon suite.
As they were undressing for bed, the husband, a big burly man, tossed his trousers to his new bride. He said, "Here, put these on."

She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body.

"I can't wear your trousers." she said.

"That's right,'' said the husband, "and don't you ever forget it. I'm the man who wears the pants in this family."

With that she flipped him her panties and said, "Try these on."

He tried them on and found he could only get them on as far as his kneecaps.

"Hell," he said. ''I can't get into your panties!"

She replied, "That's right...and that's the way it is going to stay until your attitude changes."

2006-10-14 03:47:06 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2006-10-14 03:46:38 · 27 answers · asked by MissChatea 4 in Polls & Surveys

can't buy me love no you just got to wait they say love will come easy it's just the chance you got to take-

2006-10-14 03:46:04 · 6 answers · asked by QuestionableKisses 1 in Music

ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE:
Warning keep out of children.
ON A HAIR DRYER:
Do not use while sleeping.
ON A BAG OF FRITOS:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
ON A FROZEN DINNER:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP:
Fits one head.
ON TESCO''S TIRAMISU DESERT:
Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)
ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING:
Product will be hot after heating.
ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON:
Do not iron clothes on body.
ON BOOTS CHILDRENS'' COUGH MEDICINE:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID):
Warning: may cause drowsiness.

ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR:
Not to be used for the other use.
ON SAINSBURY''S PEANUTS:
Warning: contains nuts.
ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

2006-10-14 03:44:10 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

(by searching the name of the star)

2006-10-14 03:43:46 · 3 answers · asked by alina . 1 in Celebrities

can anyone please give me pictures of nicole sherzinger from the pussycat dolls lookalikes!
PLEASE!
i really really need it.
thanks

2006-10-14 03:43:42 · 2 answers · asked by sarah s 2 in Music

2006-10-14 03:43:05 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-10-14 03:42:48 · 3 answers · asked by fragle2c 5 in Music

Mine's Lynette !

2006-10-14 03:42:39 · 14 answers · asked by yunalescax2 2 in Television

A wealthy business man and his wife are looking through a marriage-help book when his husband turns to his wife. ''It says here that the most important thing in a marriage is honesty. So let's come to grips here. Honey... have you ever cheated on me? I've never cheated on you.''
He saw the twisted look on his wife's face, and trying to supress his anger, he asked: ''How many times? And when?''

The wife responded, ''Well... you know that time when your company was broke, and you couldn't get the landlord to let his pay slide for another month?''

The husband stared. ''You mean you're the one who got him to?''

His wife knodded. The husband thought it over, then sighed. ''I guess that's okay. Any other times?''

''Well... when you had that heart attack, and the doctor refused to give a heart transplant for the ammount of money we had at the time... I kinda...''

''Ah, you're the one who made it possible.''

The husband looked honestly relieved. ''Well, that's understandable, you saved my life. Any others?''

She nodded. ''One more.''

The husband leaned forward. ''Well... you remember the time when you were running for president of your company, and you were short by 17 votes...?''

2006-10-14 03:42:01 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

I LOVE Panic! at the disco I have there cd. I'm just wondering who else loves it!

2006-10-14 03:40:19 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

2006-10-14 03:39:01 · 25 answers · asked by firefly 4 in Polls & Surveys

in the 50 cent albums which is the best.

2006-10-14 03:38:36 · 10 answers · asked by Nitin mk 2 in Music

I would be both I guess, but once I took a volunteer job at the HHS*Houston Humane Society* and I couldn't stand being in a room full of cats due to the smell....

2006-10-14 03:37:29 · 20 answers · asked by Rachelle 2 in Polls & Surveys

One day, at a bus stop there was a girl who was wearing a skintight miniskirt. When the bus arrived and it was her turn to get on, she realized that her skirt was so tight she couldn't get her foot high enough to reach to step.
Thinking it would give her enough slack to raise her leg, she reached back and unzipped her skirt a little. She still could not reach the step. Embarrassed, she reached back once again to unzip it a little more. Still, she couldn't reach the step.

So, with her skirt zipper halfway down, she reached back and unzipped her skirt all the way. Thinking that she could get on the step now, she lifted up her leg only to realize that she still couldn't reach the step.

So, seeing how embarrassed the girl was, the man standing behind her put his hands around her waist and lifted her up on to the first step of the bus. The girl turned around furiously and said, "How dare you touch my body that way, I don't even know you!"

Shocked, the man says, "Well, ma'am, after you reached around and unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we were friends."

2006-10-14 03:36:43 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

What do you think of her comment about Mel Gibson deserving death for an anti-semetic remark while drunk? Wow, if we had the death penalty for every jew who made an anti-gentile remark about us, we'd have to kill most of them.

2006-10-14 03:35:57 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Celebrities

can anyone please give me pictures of nicole sherzinger from the pussycat dolls lookalikes!
PLEASE!
i really really need it.
thanks

2006-10-14 03:35:42 · 3 answers · asked by sarah s 2 in Celebrities

TASTEMAKER-

Make words with the above words as many as u can

2006-10-14 03:35:27 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

my weekend plans have been ruined coz i have no money. i have no way of getting any money.

i cant afford to go out and all my friends are busy.
i only have terestrial tv, i dont have a computer at my flat and i cant afford cerdit for my phone.

what can i do?
how can i stop feeling so lonely?

2006-10-14 03:34:43 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Entertainment

'You are In Love when _________ '

^_^

2006-10-14 03:34:07 · 29 answers · asked by RAINGIRL 6 in Polls & Surveys

I play the flute and I really want some peices of Disney Music (Eg. Cinderella, Mulan, Little Mermaid).

Do I have to buy this music from a book or is there anywhere on the internet where I can print / copy it?

2006-10-14 03:33:37 · 6 answers · asked by x_Super_Social_Superstar_x 3 in Music

It came out early 90's. The chorus goes "oooooh lady, won't you take it easy, push me down, mother america is brandishing her weapons, she keeps me safe and warm by threats and misconceptions

2006-10-14 03:32:07 · 2 answers · asked by williamsunderwater 1 in Music

when he entered the bath he expanded till he got out and dried his self then went back to his normal size

2006-10-14 03:32:05 · 20 answers · asked by Big hands 3 in Television

please help me get out of here says the flamingo but neither the lion or the panther can reach far enough to drag the flamingo out. just then a horse passes by and the lion asks can he help the flamingo. the horse says the only thing he has long enough to reach is his dick, so he whips it out and the flamingo grabs hold and pulls itself free. the following week the lion and panther are out walking again and once again they find the flamingo stuck in the mud hole. we cant help you today says the lion, for we know the horse has gone on holiday. the panther thinks for a second and says maybe the mongoose can help, he's just bought a new ferrarri. we could tie a rope to it and pull the flamingo out. great idea says the lion and off he dashes to get the mongoose. 10 minutes later they are back, tie a rope to the bumper and pull the flamingo free.....and the moral of this little story is that you dont have to be hung like a horse to pull a bird if you drive a ferrarri.

2006-10-14 03:31:58 · 11 answers · asked by mine of useless information 1 in Jokes & Riddles

i personally prefer the original version, The Infernal Affairs! heheh.. those who had watched the departed, do you have any idea what is in the envelope leonardo passed to the doctor before he died??

2006-10-14 03:31:15 · 8 answers · asked by Samantha T 2 in Movies

Please name at least two and...
if you can, please e-mail them to me at richard22msn@yahoo.com
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!

2006-10-14 03:29:23 · 7 answers · asked by Richard 1 in Music

and, if you have time, can you check out my lyrics? www.patsimone.blogspot.com

2006-10-14 03:28:23 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

do u know where can i find/download the chiquititas song or music video?

2006-10-14 03:28:04 · 2 answers · asked by fifi 2 in Music

On grave-yard or somewhere else?

2006-10-14 03:27:32 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

I love technology. But feel that if we had to work hard, plant our own food, that sort of thing, we wouldnt have the emotional problems that we have today...what about you?

If I could I think I would choose late 1800s to ealry 1900s America

2006-10-14 03:27:24 · 8 answers · asked by heresyhunter@sbcglobal.net 4 in Polls & Surveys